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back to article Japanese bloke gets arsey over artificial rectum

A Japanese chap is a bit browned off after a hospital wrongly diagnosed him with rectal cancer, whipped out the offending section of digestive tract and fitted an articial replacement. According to the Mainichi Daily, the poor bloke had surgery back in March at a university hospital in western Miyazaki prefecture to remove a …

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  1. Steve Evans

    Cool!

    A bionic arse!

    Weapon of mass destruction!

    0 0
  2. Chris Bradshaw
    Coat

    Has to be said

    What an a**hole...

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  3. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Well, thats a...

    pain in the arse!

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  4. Alex 32
    Coat

    May I be the first to say that..

    .. this is akin to being up shit creek without a rectum..

    Mine's the one with the Plastic Fantastic in the pocket..

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  5. Marky W
    Stop

    To many puns...

    ...not enough time.

    Must do work. Mortgage to pay. Kids to feed. Aaaaaaaaaaarggggurglewheeeee.....

    Where *are* those dried-frog pills?

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  6. May Contain Nuts
    Coat

    I hope they get to the bottom of this...

    This bloke had high hopes for a career as a farting musician, but the Japanese health service rectum.

    Etc, etc...

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  7. Hermes Conran
    Unhappy

    Poor bloke,

    he really has had his ass handed to him!

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  8. Scott Broukell
    WTF?

    Haven't they heard of biopsy !!!!

    that's another fine hole you've got me in ! ... I've got, .. in, ... you ...whatever

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  9. Jay Castle
    Thumb Up

    He's lucky!

    Oftentimes, having the wrong op can be life threatening. However, in this case it's just a pain in the arse.........

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  10. Hollerith 1

    I have to admire the medical scientists...

    ...who devoted their lives to the creation of an artificial rectum.

    (On a less smirking note: those who have known anyone with colon cancer know it is no joke)

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  11. neb
    WTF?

    with two arseholes....

    just think of the amount of shit i could come out with

    i wonder if gordon brown has had his fitted yet?

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  12. Tea-800
    Coat

    Typical, really.

    Health service in half-arsed diagnosis shocker.

    0 0
  13. Smallbrainfield
    Coat

    Making this guy the butt of these jokes...

    ... is a bit out of order.

    0 0
  14. Christopher Rogers
    Joke

    is it not...

    Weapon of ASS destruction??

    0 0
  15. cookieMonster Silver badge
    Happy

    Bum deal ???

    It's beer o'clock, time to go...

    0 0
  16. dracnoc

    Why bother with court action?

    I'd be fecking furious enough to tear 'em a new a**hole... oh, wait...

    0 0
  17. Anonymous Coward
    Terminator

    Cyborg Arse

    I hear Kevin Warwick is quite jealous!

    Now if they could only incorporate and intelligently link it to those fancy electronic Japanese toilets.

    Seriously: Poor chap nothing worse than when surgeons cause greater damage than the original ailment. Hope he gets his full compensation rights for that one.

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  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    lol

    The news paper name is mildly amusing "everyday daily" that reminds me of a shop called "fappy" because fax makes you happy.

    0 0
  19. LaeMi Qian
    Coat

    He got a little behind...

    ...over the weak-end.

    0 0
  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bummer

    Bummer

    0 0
  21. Jaded.In.Oregon
    Coat

    I'd probably

    Blow an O-ring if I found out about that kind of mistake...... I'll get my coat...

    0 0
  22. dunncha
    Happy

    @ Hermes Conran

    Prize for the best pun goes to Hermes Conran

    Poor Guy

    he really has had his ass handed to him!'

    Laughed out loud to that - thank you

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  23. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    the doctors must be editors...

    ...They unnecessarily replaced a colon with a semicolon.

    0 0
  24. David Beeston
    Thumb Up

    @Smallbrainfield

    Fantastic. Nearly pissed myself.

    0 0
  25. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Wait a minute

    They have ARTIFICIAL assholes now? No wonder SCO no longer needed Darl McBride!

    0 0
  26. Alan B

    That's a bummer, isn't it?

    'nuff said...

    0 0
  27. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Rectum?

    Darn near killed 'im!

    0 0
  28. MadonnaC
    Joke

    Remember... (I'm dating my self with this one)

    Nixon had an Ars*h*le transplant?

    The Ars*h*le rejected him!

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  29. This post has been deleted by its author

  30. gerry 6

    Probe required?

    I trust the Japanese NHS will launch a probe into this.

    0 0
  31. Anonymous Coward
    Coffee/keyboard

    @Gerry 6

    Bastard.

    0 0
  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Neb

    Why would GB need an artificial arsehole? He's got dozens of real ones in his cabinet.

    0 0
  33. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    IT angle?

    This really is scraping the bottom of the odds and sods article barrel.

    On the plus side being the butt of jokes could earn him a living as the straight man in a double act.

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  34. sleepy

    "It's a bum rap"

    said the hospital spokesman, "there's an obvious hole in the patient's argument".

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  35. LuMan
    Joke

    Terrible

    Do we really need all these puns to entert anus?

    0 0
  36. TheRealRoland

    @Legless

    And her name was Eileen?

    0 0
  37. alyn

    Two arseholes?

    Then I could fart in stereo. Bliss!

    0 0
  38. U4eA
    Coat

    £23k...

    ..for a new arsehole? That seems a little excessive in view of the fact there any number of a'holes in my immediate vicinty whom I would have happily donated for free.

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