Steve Ballmer's head
Balloons look too much like Steve Ballmer's head. That's why they were 'shopped out.
Paris, because she takes her balloons with her everywhere.
Microsoft's mischievous marketing mavens are at it again, this time Photoshopping some of the fun out of its upcoming Windows 7 faux launch parties. As we reported last Friday, Redmond is sponsoring global launch parties for its upcoming operating system, set for release in late October. To enhance the festivities, they'll …
...what the hell are the finding so amusing about the Windows 7 installation process? Is it really just hitler with flashing eyes as observed/made up by xkcd http://xkcd.com/528/ ? Or have some scampish developers replaced some graphics so the inevitable 'Browse the web more securely than ever' actually shows firefox, and the 'Productivity' bit shows openoffice...
Perhaps it was just a simple case of red, blue and orange balloons not being very representative of Europe, or anywhere else outside of America? I'll be honest, the last me and my multicultural friends piled round for a party and crowded round a single laptop, we also drew the line at Red and Blue American style 'party' balloons, they are so passé.
I should point out, savoury nibbles, beverages, lots of people with pointy fingers and laptops do not make good bed fellows.
contain a inhibition reduction gas that when released into the atmosphere, enables us to reach for our credit cards despite the fact we're on a tight budget. Added is some psychotropic dust to allow things to sparkle and buzz so that the bad memories of Windows Vista ("the view before you fall off the edge TM) can be suppressed allowing us to view Windows 7 with giddy joy!!
The region of the images involving the balloons contains a steganographic message for the Technological Evangelism department of M$ in each region. In the USA no evangelism was thought necessary. They are pretty thoroughly locked in. In Germany, the message was too large so they needed a larger region, hence the different image. Munich has finished buying M$'s licences/protection fees so the team was dealt a scathing reminder of the consequences of failure.
hmm.. the pics are called people.jpg & people_noballoons.jpg. Both are available at each site - mebbe they just chose the wrong one on one page..?
More humourously, this Microsoft party page is hosted on Red Hat & Apache (with indexing still on - inquiring minds should probably refrain from browsing through their client list, though you might notice the VAIO logo that was also shopped out of the final pic here: http://www.houseparty.com/img/_clients/windows7test/splash/bg3.jpg )
Looking at the two images, I note that the second one has much more accurate colors; the first one having a green pall over everything. I am therefore assuming that the balloons were removed so that the color balancing would work better and not make everyone look like trolls.
Here in the US we are all either colorblind, or we are trolls, not sure which.
Yeah man, lets all gather around a tiny laptop screen.
But what are they watching?
I think, in the German party, they are watching hardcore porn. The Asian girl, in particular, looks rather excited, possibly pointing at a huge wang. The bloke in the check pink shirt looks a bit worried, possibly he's inadequate in the trouser snake department. The guy sitting down is rather smug, probably because it's not his computer and he's just planted the porn on his flatmates work rig for a laugh.
It's possible the American version also features pornography on screen - certainly the black girl is even more amazed than our German based Asian bird. In this case, our computer operator, the large black guy, is also looking smug, possibly because he's a large black guy.
Then again, it may just be my imagination. Perhaps they are all laughing and/or incredulous over the windows 7 user experience, or maybe they are watching a Disney movie?
Whatever the reason for hi-jinks and photo changes, I reckon the balloons are in the American version as a reference point for "fun", just in case they don't get it.
I'm not being funny or insulting, but I really think the reason for removing the balloons is that the kinds of Americans who would take part in something so cringe worthy, are far dumber than their European counterparts. They might hold a party and drink some cheep beer, but putting up balloons and letting of party poppers like a 7 year old having his first organised birthday party is a step too far. Whereas it doesn't seem to be the case in America.
But come on... a party to celebrate a new version of Windows? That's sad no matter where you're from.
Perhaps this will spawn a flood of Facebook parody parties, with flashmobs turning up outside department stores to 'celebrate' the release of a new Miele washing machine, or a supermarket to 'celebrate' a new improved recipe Robinsons strawberry jam.
I'd go, hell yeah! So would Paris, probably.
... I vote we hold Microsoft exorcism parties.
Game 1: Sit around and laugh as you watch the boot time for any version of windows, or the number of patches released since you last ran Windows Update five minutes ago, or the number of virus signatures uploaded since you ran your last AV update two minutes ago. Winner is the first to throw up or pass out from laughing too much.
Game 2: Everybody get a helium balloon, find your least favourite Microsoft product, put a return address on it with an indelible marker (e.g. "Mr B.Gates, Microsoft, Redmond, USA, reward for safe return") and tie it to the balloon, then release all the balloons in one go. Repeat as necessary or until you've run out of MS discs. Winner is the first to have one of their balloons sucked into the engine of a passing aircraft.
Game 3: Microsoft Top Trumps. If you have any CDs left, get out all the driver CDs you got with your mice, keyboards etc and play Top Trumps with them, using the driver version printed on the disc.
Game 4: If you're still going by now, well done. You have no MS discs left and you're ready to Hackintosh your PC or install Linux...
So how come they can promote DELL laptop in these shots, but in the head-swap piccy they had to remove the Apple logo from the Macbook, which can easily run Windows, though lord alone knows why you bother! Then again, if you're going to get lots of young trendy metro-sexual types round you might install it for a laugh!
> I wouldn't be laughing like that unless I was installing Windows 7 on somebody else's computer.
I can sense a captioning contest:
I Suggest: "This will teach Richard Stallman to not password-protect his accounts!"*
* Last I heard, RMS had ethical issues with password-protecting computers, though that was some years ago.
Speaking as somebody who used to do amateur studio photography I'm less surprised about the balloons being take out than I am about them being included in the first place.
What kind of third rate set designer actually put those balloons? From an aesthetic perspective. The viewers attention is supposed ot be focused on the man in the foreground, but putting the balloons behind his head draws the reader's eye upwards and to the left. Which is not a good thing. You're supposed to focus on the family scene but instead you focus on the shiny spots on the balloons.
Sadly, the T&Cs are locked down so tight on the party site that anything except the logos provided for that particular event aren't allowed. That stuffs several t shirts people might be wearing, too.
Of course, an interesting point is whether 'contains any visible logos, drawings, cartoons, photographs, pictures, phrases or Trademarks (as defined in Section 3.2 below) or other third party materials other than any of the foregoing as featured on materials provided by the sponsor of any Party at which any photographs or video were taken;'
includes plush toys. Cute penguins, daemons and puffer fish ahoy..
If it takes half a dozen people, and by the looks on their faces, several attempts and a long night to install W7 I'm not sure it's worth the effort.
It wouldn't surprise me if it does take a hell of a lot less time and effort but it's the men that have hogged the keyboard and the women have the 'I told you four hours ago, but you had to try and do it the clever way' look on thier faces.
It's a look of relief on the men's faces and 'It's about fucking time, you twat' on the women's faces.
At least in the Euro version they are allowed to drink.
Who cares I am still yet to be convinced of any OS that is in current use. Like all of them slap on some paint but they are still a dog underneath yeah that includes Crapple. I have tried using GNU/Linux as desktop and lost the plot, windows ( hmmmm......) and cheap OS huge hardware cost (OSX). Yes I use both CentOS and FreeBSD as servers (nice). I Just can't all wooshy over desktops.