back to article Twitter is mainly pointless babble and other rubbish

Most of Twitter is pointless babble, spam and self promotion, a bunch of Texas-based marketing analysts with improbable nicknames has declared. The study by Pear Analytics categorised a sample of US Twitter traffic into seven categories: news, spam, self-promotion, pointless babble (what it called the “I am eating a sandwich …


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  1. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Why pick on twitter?

    > Most of Twitter is pointless babble, spam and self promotion,

    he same can be said of the internet in general, TV too, newspapers definitely and probably of the whole of the human race's interactions within itself. The trick is to select the pointless babble that coincides with your points of view - and to discard the rest.

    Don't even get me started on people who talk to their pets

  2. Elmer Phud

    Pope etc.

    Has the bear finished with the loo paper out in the forest, yet?

  3. Timo

    breakthrough research

    I do hope that they posted it to twitter in small chunks so that everyone could ignore it.

    So pray tell how would they classify their own tw@t-feeds? Pointless babble, or "other rubbish"?

  4. Anonymous Coward


    So finally someone else agrees with me Twitter is pointless. It's a fucking waste of good bandwidth. I hope someone takes it down hard in another DOS attack and it stays down for good. I really don't give a crap what people have to say on there, if I want to know what my buddies are doing I'll call them. What makes it worse are the twits/twats who use it think they're cool all of a sudden because they can tell the world what they're doing. Really, who gives a toss?

    To top it all off, now some governmental departments think it's a good way of keeping the population informed about policies etc? Give me a break!

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton


    I am out walking the dog at the moment. Last night I had a curry from the new curry house down the road. It was pretty good to be honest though it was pricey. Cor just seen a lovely woman on the other side of the road.

  6. Anonymous Coward

    No no matter how many times I read that,

    I can't get my brain to read "Bacholar of Science" instead of bovine excrement when I see BS.

  7. James Dunmore
    Dead Vulture

    Similar stats for el reg

    Seriously - I'm sure there will be a theme similar on here :)

  8. Doug Glass


    I am reading this article now.

  9. Michael Downie

    Well Duh...

    Considering the format of Twitter, would it not be obvious that all you would get out of it would be inane banter. I am annoyed by this for two reasons;

    1) there are people in the world who get paid to do this kind of thing

    2) no one will pay me to do that kind of thing

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    And in other announcements from the department of stating the painfully obvious, Asylums are mostly full of lunatics and there are a lot of French people living in France.

  11. Anonymous Coward

    Flawed statistical analysis.

    Who says the categories have to be mutually exclusive? If they redid their figures without that artificial restriction, classifying each tweet into *all* the categories it matched instead of just one, they could have come to the much simpler conclusion that 100% of all tweets are pointless spammy self-promoting newsy pass-along conversational babble. Which sounds like a far more accurate summary.

    Load of old badger's kidneys if you ask me.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Pointless Babble

    "Busy posting a comment on The Register..."

    Clever study that - Humans?, spewing out Pointless Babble? - who on earth woulda thunk it?


    Paris, because 90% of what she says is Pointless Babble.

  13. Steve X


    I'm amazed, I'd never have expected news to be so popular with the tw@ts. It'll never last

  14. Anonymous Coward

    So nothing new here there...

    Twitter is basically the same as the average pub conversation, but without the fun of drinking and being socially interactive with friends.

    Tweet or Drink.... hard choice!

  15. Robert E A Harvey
    Paris Hilton


    "Most of Twitter is pointless babble, spam and self promotion, "

    Sorry? wasn't that self-evident? Who suggested it wasn't?

    It all sounds like Paris to me.

  16. Nic Brough 1


    >Most of Twitter is pointless babble, spam and self promotion, a bunch of Texas-based marketing analysts with improbable nicknames has declared.

    In other shock news, water is wet, bears sometimes relieve themselves in woods, and I like beer.

  17. Marv

    This long.... work that out?! I looked at twitter over 2 years ago, instantly deciding it was a load of pony then and still is now for any sane human....the internet is for better things that I've not thought of yet. Move along twitter, please.

  18. Bod

    So what

    Most of what people write in personal emails and before that letters is pointless babble. What about postcards? People write about what a lovely time they're having and what they had for lunch and send it to people who really don't care.

  19. This post has been deleted by its author

  20. A. Coatsworth

    Mr Metric?

    Are you sure his nickname isn't "Captain Obvious"?

    In any case, he did find the constitutive elements of web 2.0: "pointless babble, spam and self promotion"... It is not badger paws as reported before.

  21. MadonnaC

    2 observations

    1. love the URL ^^ twit research

    2. it is said that an infinite amount of monkeys sitting at an infinite amount of typewriters will produce the works of shakespear - thanks to the interenet, we now know this isn't true

  22. Anonymous Coward

    @AC - RE Pointless

    Yeah, twitter is pointless until you get the point - use it, don't use it, nobody is forcing you to.

    I have educated geek contacts who post very useful links on a regular basis, basically, it's an easy way to share little bits of information with lots of like minded friends and contacts.

    It's similar to phone text messages, but more social.

    If your too stupid to leverage a system for your own purposes, you have no kudos.

  23. Anonymous Coward


    Your tweet has 218 chars. FAIL!

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Did it take more than 5 seconds... determine Twitter is for TWITS?

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture


    News, spam, self-promotion, pointless babble, conversational, and pass-along is six categories, not seven.

  26. Fremma


    Mine was a ham and egg toasted.

  27. Craig 2

    What I want to know is...

    Where the hell do I get one of these (probably) highlt-paid jobs stating the painfully obvious?

  28. petep

    Twatter is utterly pointless babble....

    ...and as far as I'm concerned a sackable offence at work at any rate.

    What happened to having a real life?

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Where are you going for your holidays?

    They are missing a trick though, just need to pop twitter terminals into hair dresser salons, and then hair technicians or barbers can get on with their job, without having to think up mindless patter (that was probably number seven).

  30. gollux

    No, you don't say...

    You seem to have fallen down a 30 foot well, are you all right?

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Eat at Cafe Twitter


    Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, eating my lunch, spam, spam, had a coffee too, spam, spam and spam.

  32. not.known@this.address

    @MadonnaC's 2nd Observation

    I just asked one of my Infinite Monkeys to have a quick play on my keyboard (Slightly better control than the cat) and I think I see your point....



    Ah, but when shall we three meet again? ;lkgjh os ao pfkh] lkj 'poi7ratr 'p/# osho lsq]8- a

    To sleep, perchance to dream, ldgh kjdh otuh s/,jBJY snmgf up;o

    'Tis done, what is done. laijh o;qh jh;'oij #6u ;'[o[';,/m qpopim

  33. Lunatik


    Those who post here to moan about posting to Twitter being pointless and irrelevant...

  34. Anonymous Coward

    @ @AC - RE Pointless

    "If your too stupid to leverage a system for your own purposes, you have no kudos."

    You must be outside the clique of your "educated geek mates" as you are aparently too stupid to know when to use your and you're!

  35. Anonymous Coward

    Re: Pointless

    "Really, who gives a toss?"

    Well, given that you took the time to click on a headline for a news article regarding a service you claim to hate, and then took further time to write a comment on said article, I would say that you give a toss.

    I really don't understand those who spend so much time hating things that have no impact on them if they choose not to engage with such things. Bizarre!

  36. breakfast

    Mr Metric

    Mr Metric is a little known superhero whose powers largely revolve around the ability to convert inches to centimetres really quickly. He's also quite handy between litres and pints.

    His nemesis is The Emperor, whose irrational Imperial System drives him into fits of apoplexy and whose constant taunts about Mr Metric's manliness ( some things will always be measured in inches ) often haunt the superhero as he lies awake through the long hours after midnight, imagining himself heroically opening the eyes of the world to his more rational system of measurement.

  37. Peter Mc Aulay

    Heh, better than I expected

    So that's 12.30% to 49.85% of meaningful traffic (depending on whether you count "conversational" or not); even on the lower end of the scale this is a better signal to noise ratio than e-mail or usenet.

  38. mittfh

    Only 3.75% spam?

    Does that include or exclude the spambots that retweet random messages without attribution between their links to make automatic detection harder?

    Definitely not included would be the spambots that follow given hashtags, and automatically follow anyone using them...

    AC Thurs @ 19:40: "Twitter is for twits" - ITYM -i +a in that last word :) Just don't say it on radio :)

    And what do they mean by "5.85% self promotion"? If they mean promoting websites etc. run by you, then surely some of that figure could be included in the spam count?

    Does "news" include accounts that grab RSS feeds from news sites and tweet them?

    I assume "conversational" is probably @ replies or mentions.

    And talking of pointless babble and self-promotion... :D

    As well as tweeting under my nickname, you'll find me behind a couple of twitterfeeds: @CovWeather and @LonWeather - both of which should be self-explanatory!

    Now to spend an enjoyable evening blocking the 100s of spam accounts that will have read this and decided to start following me as a result...oh, and if you're deluded enough to genuinely want to follow me and read my random incomprehensible gibberish, might be a good idea to let me know so I don't include you in my next purge...

  39. lukewarmdog

    No Title

    "I really don't understand those who spend so much time hating things that have no impact on them if they choose not to engage with such things. Bizarre!"

    Much more fun than hating things that DO have an impact on you and which you DO engage with. Like your wife.

  40. I didn't do IT.


    Oh. My. God.

    That, sir, is brilliant by any measuring system.

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