back to article 73% of Brits too shagged for a shag

A shock survey of 2,000 adult Brits has revealed that 73 per cent are too tired at the end of the day to get their rocks off - the result of a national malaise of bone idleness which has poor old Blighty creaking under the weight of lardy couch potatoes. According to the "alarming" Nuffield Health figures, 58 per cent admit …


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  1. Paul 4

    I still think...

    It is not just lazyness but tiredness. Our long working hours and long comutes meen we are too tired to do anything. Leaving the house at 8.30 and getting home at 5.30 (as they do in alot of europe) means you feel alot better than leaving the house at 7.30 and getting back at 6.30 (and that is on a good day).

  2. LuMan
    Paris Hilton

    Utter twaddle

    I won't run to catch a bus purely because it looks uncool!

    'Sides, I have sex most evenings (not always with someone else, though, unfortunately..!).

    Paris, 'cos, well, I'm off for sex again (by myself)

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I am frequently too shagged for a shag at the end of the day ...

    But sometimes that's because I've been shagging in my lunch hour, a time at which I'm much more likely to be in the mood.

  4. lucky13

    Change in Law

    Time for an efficient and calculated response.

    Convincing the majority of adults that fall into this category that they need to change their life style is difficult/impossible. Getting them to actually implement change is a whole new animal.

    Write them off like a bad debt. I’m not saying remove all support, however I think the focus of any additional resources should be diverted.

    2 points:

    1. Most children don’t really understand nutrition and how what they eat effect’s their body.

    2. Most children have no control over the food they are given.


    1. Improve curriculum based lessons aimed at educating children about the reaction their bodies have to food.

    2. New law: Allowing your child to become obese can be regarded as child abuse (in come social services). – It’s just as bad if not worse than hitting a child. There can be a reporting mechanism in place for teachers to notify the authorities should they feel the need.

    3. Children MUST not skip out on PE lessons. Why is the reaction different for a student skipping a PE lesson compared to a maths lesson. There are great advances being made in the provision of physical activity (rather than the traditional sport). The old arguments are losing any credibility they used to have.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Newcastle (62 per cent)...

    I'm in the other 38 percent then.

    I'm fine at the end of the night - especially for "that". I suppose its evolution in practice if the lazy can't reproduce - leaving us fit people to eventually take over.

    Paris - she's always got the energy...

  6. Paul was already taken
    Paris Hilton

    Lazy or honest

    Did they tell the respondents what a healthy amount of exercise is before asking if they get enough? It could just be that Glaswegians have been bombarded with so many health campaigns recently that that know exactly how much exercise they should be getting. Whereas the Cardifians just don't realise a walk down the pub doesn't count.

    Paris, cause we wouldn't be too tired for her.

  7. Anonymous Coward

    Cardiff fitter than rest?

    I though those sheep were in pens -

    sorry, obligatory welsh joke - too tired and lazy to make joke about others

  8. F Seiler

    simply shocking

    (About on the same track as taken Paul, but anyway)

    All that list at the end of the article says that three out of four people in Glagow have a sports complex while "only" two in three in Cardiff do? I think if anything can be read out of those figures, it's that these people succeded in making everyone unhappy with their sports propaganda.

    Both numbers are WAY too high. If 10% or even 20% felt they should do more,OK. ....but 60% + ...hello??? (How about either do something about it, or just accept your lazy self as your natural form :).

    PS /me is closer to the "no unnecessary moves" end of the spectrum, but then again i'm a programmer, not a construction worker or something.

    Megane-kun sign, because he is not allowed to run or perform any risky movement in the lab. Deliberately ignoring the subtext of the icon, the guy just fits.

  9. Will Godfrey Silver badge

    Then again

    Some people are too tired because they are forced to work 12 hour shifts for peanuts (and don't give me the bullshit about restricted working hours)


    Have neighbours that seem to have about 20 people resident in four rooms (oddly they are seldom all there at once)

  10. SimpleUser

    Could it relate

    to living on an island ? All that fog, sun- lacking climate ? Too much pints ? Not enough pints ?

    Could it relate to the ladies ? Not attractive enough ? Too attractive (the 'werwolves syndrome' ) ?

    Not enough Paris? Phantasies over realities ?

    Look at the French, the Italians, even us Germans, no complains there or here.

    How can we be of assistance ?

    Smile Guys, it's just another nano second in the evolution, all forgotten soon.

  11. Adam Foxton

    Should be retitled

    "Glaswegians are UK's most truthful about health levels"

  12. Anonymous Coward

    Oh heck

    I was going to make a reasoned comment, but I just can't be arsed.

  13. Anonymous Coward

    @Paul 4

    I'm going to have to disagree. Fitness is a big influence to the bodies' ability to cope with long days. For example, if you have a long day, but take a 1/2 hour run or session in the gym at lunchtime you will be much more able to cope with the day's length. Physical exercise not only improves your resilience to fatigue, but also the endorphin rush that follows exercise gives you a lot of additional energy.

  14. Tim Bergel
    Thumb Down

    So lets get this straight -

    - a survey of a rather small number of adults (selection method unspecified) carried out on behalf of a firm that runs health and fitness centres comes up with alarming responses to unknown and probably leading questions.

    i.e. total crap.

  15. Richard 81

    @By lucky13

    It's that kind of well reasoned, logical thinking that will mean you never get in a position to implement those changes. You might hope to become part of the various advisory boards the government turn to for advice. But since the government then does its best to do the exact opposite of what's advised, it may have a serious affect on your mental health.

    I would like to know though, what fraction of 73% is male or female.

  16. Bounty


    How do we know if that is bad? Is there a survey of France that says they screw like rabbits to compare this with? How many Austrailians run to catch a bus? Why the hell would anyone ride a bus anyways? I wouldn't walk to catch a bus, sit to catch one or even allow myself to be lifted onto one. We all know there is nothing on the other channels so why get up to change it? Or we could get lots of exercize like all the farmers back in the 1860's who only lived util they were 40.

  17. Steve Jones 2
    Paris Hilton


    Oh, I can't be bothered.


    Paris, cos she's too shagged already

  18. Anonymous John


    I'm too lazy to post a comment.

  19. Michael 82

    "Our survey said"

    Out of 2000 surveys requested only 85% of the survey came back incomplete...

    "cause we just couldnt be arsed!"


  20. Eddy Ito

    21 Across

    "________ is the mother of invention." Eight letters, starts with an L.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    More of this

    The beach almost got crowded a couple of times in June (you know, when it was summer); hopefully everyone will stay at home from now on and leave it to me.

  22. GeorgeTuk
    Thumb Down

    Surely its long hours not laziness

    I mean look at all the babies chavs have at 16 whilst most workers get babies at about 30.

    Still that wouldn't get any headlines would it.

    Did it actually breakdown any reasons for this tiredness or just blanket laziness. I know it would cost the economy lots but one day I would really love to see the European Working Time Directive enacted here, I really think it would make alot of us alot happier but maybe not richer.

  23. Si 1

    I'm too tired...

    ... to click away from this page. It means moving my hand off the keyboard to the mouse and that requires too much energy. Maybe if I'm lucky I can use the tab key to get me elsewhere....

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Bucking the trend

    Obviously wrong, a quick poll in this Manchester household proves that only 50% of the people are too tired for a shag at the end of the day.

    As for Cardiff, have you ever been there? There's fuck all else to do apart from umm, fuck..

    Fnarrr... Polling....

  25. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Too tired for a shag at night? Simple ...

    ... shag in the morning, instead. You never know, that might even help to lower the number of office affairs, misconduct accusations AND make people happier at work. At least it would make the morning conversations at the coffee machine more interesting.

  26. Charlie Clark Silver badge

    Scrotes getting lazy and fat?

    Any stats on how many gangsters are now dependent on cars and guns or cybercrime?

    I for one welcome our fat-arsed underclass overlords.

  27. Peter Kay

    Now all I need is someone else..

    Kayaking tonight, mountain biking tomorrow night, DIY (no, not that - the hammer and nails type) and housework other nights.

    As to children not skipping out on PE lessons - do fuck off, there's a good chap. One reason children skip PE lessons is because they don't like it. Forcing them to do PE badly with a teacher they can't stand and students they dislike will not lead them to suddenly start liking sport. Quite the reverse, in fact.

    Give them a wide range of sports (not just team sports) and a choice of when to do it and even some of the extremely unsporty kids might start liking it.

    I do wish they'd bring home economics back; I had absolutely zero cookery lessons during school and it's galling that nothing has changed in the last 20+ years. Not everyone likes sport or at least has to hunt around to find something they enjoy, but practically everyone enjoys some type of food that can be easily prepared and is reasonably healthy.

    It would also help combat uninformed viewpoints such as vegan and vegetarian food being boring, and fish turning up most often in batter..

  28. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

    So its got nothing to do with the fact that...

    I'm up at 6AM, commute, do a full days work, try to keep fit by going for a swim and/or martial arts training, spend time with the kids, find some time to eat, find some time for the wife and am then in bed by about 11PM totally knackered trying to summon up the energy to do it all again for the other remaining 4 days in the week.

    Just blaming the couch potato lifestyle is far to lazy a conclusion on this one I'm afraid which makes me believe that this survey, just like all the others that survey a tiny amount of people and then extrapolate the results out to fit the population - is truly suspect.

  29. John 104

    Long Work Day?

    So let me get this straight, leaving at 8:30 and getting home at 5:30 is considered a long work day? No wonder the UK is getting fat! I leave the house at 6AM and get back home at 5PM - And still have the juice for some nookie 2-3 times a work week (not counting the weekend). That being said, there are our fair share of fat MoFos here in the states, but it doesn't seem to stop them from having babies and living off of wellfare!

    WTF, because WTF!

  30. Old Tom

    Too lazy to run for a bus?

    No, I won't run for a bus because:

    a) like LuMan, I don't think it's cool

    b) I don't mind walking all the way

    c) if b) is too much in one go, you can stop off for a pint

    Getting the bus is the lazy option, not failing to run for it.

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Going down...

    >59 per cent "won’t walk up two flights of stairs to reach their office"

    From personal observation there is also a high percentage of lard arses who won't walk down two flights of stairs to leave their offiice even if they have to queue for the lift.

    As a general rule if it's four flights or less I'll walk but you'll never catch me running for a bus as I don't do that public transport thing.

  32. Absent

    Vicious circle?

    Maybe it's a vicious circle, people have become so fat that they don't find the partners sexually appealing any more. Less sex = less exercise = more fat = less sex.

  33. Bobby 1
    Paris Hilton

    I'm sure I'm not the only one

    I love it when people complain about leaving home at 6.30 and getting home at 5.30. Unless they live 5mins from work, this isn't exactly a lot of work... personally I leave at 7.00 at get home at 9.30, and I'm sure a lot of people do a bigger commute than me.

    Either way, people who find computers a better past-time than sex are better out the gene pool, and fat people should be culled either way...

  34. Benny
    Thumb Down

    Oh Im lazy!

    I thought it was getting up at 05:30 and getting back at 21:30-22:00 that meant I had nothing left to give, my bad! I'll make sure I try harder....

  35. Quirkafleeg

    Re: Too lazy to run for a bus?

    You'd run for a bus if you got out a bit later than planned, surely. And why is it the lazy option? It might just be too far to walk or bike, or the weather might be too bad (for biking, consider icy roads in winter; yes, the main roads will be fine, but that's not enough), or there's nowhere to put the bike…

    No, I'll continue to make use of the buses as needed, and bike or walk where & when practical.

  36. elderlybloke

    I got a lot of exersize

    when I worked for a living , surveying type stuff, climbing hills etc. and my knees are now buggered.

    Now I have got a TV in the bedroom and can watch it without even getting out of bed.

    I can however , get stuck in to doing a workout on the computer keyboard with my nice OS.

  37. Vanir


    What API is that? Is it anything to do with coupling and cohesion? Or is it just an abstract concept?

  38. Richard 39

    If your not happy, make some changes

    Reading half these articles about who has it worse (OMG I have to get up at stupid o'clock and come home at stupider o'clock so i'm too tired), people need to remember their life is exactly that... their life.

    If you're moaning for moanings sake or to get one up one everyone else ODFO, If you don't like your life, change it!

    It's not the impossible dream that most people believe. You can work better hours, have time to socialise and enjoy keeping fit and do those things you want to do (be it sit on the sofa on your ass or make something of yourself). All you have to do is engage that lump of grey matter in your skull and make choices then have the balls to implement them.

    It seems to me that most people are stuck in a glass box, too content or lazy or scared or de-motivated to see that they can smash their way out of it on their own.

    so what if people are too tired to have sex at the end of the day, that's their choice. I choose to work easy hours, have a nice commute (in my car), find time for the gym and still spend my evenings with the lovely lady, making the beast with two backs, if people really wanted to have a shag at the end of the day then they would pro-actively do something about it to ensure they could get their end away

  39. N2 Silver badge

    The only excercise I get

    Is walking to the pub & sex

    Thats why Im so fit!

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Weak genes...

    ....just as I always suspected! Most people are just dumb and lazy. Bring on the eugenics! :)

    Me I like to fuck as much as possible, second only to eating and sleeping....and the thought of watching ANYTHING on the idiot lantern let alone something I actively dislike is just so retarded it defies consideration.

  41. Equitas


    Not physically fit? Sadistic PE teachers with a less-than-healthy interest in their pupils certainly don't help on that count.

    Eating unhealthily? A lot of the males in the country have never seen the inside of a Home Ec classroom and most of those who have had home Ec Classes have been on the receiving end of sexist Home Ec teachers bitterly resentful about having to teach males.

    Too tired for sex? We do work longer hours than most nations, but surely it's politically-correct to regard heterosexual activity as somewhat deviant?

  42. Anonymous Coward

    I know..

    people who drive from the office to the supermarket (across the road) for lunch.

    drive to the local garage for cigarettes (10mins walk across the street)

    I have seen people jump on a bus, pay £1.20 and jump off it 10mins later.

    Then when you ask them if they go to a gym "yes once a week for an hour" and turns out all they do is lift a dumbell once, walk and talk on the treadmill and then hit the boozer/fast food joint on the way home.

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Thank You Richard 39!!!!

    I couldn't have put it better.

  44. Anonymous Coward

    Glasgow (75 per cent)

    No surprise there. It would take a lot more than diet & exercise to make even 10% of Glaswegians shaggable...

  45. goggyturk

    Simple solution

    Outsource Glasgow to Ireland. Judging from what they get excited about, most of them want to live there anyway, so now's the time to do it.

    I think we should have a referendum on this issue sometime soon.

  46. John 158

    Flowers in your hair and a P45 in your butt.

    Quote from Richard 39:

    'It's not the impossible dream that most people believe. You can work better hours, have time to socialise and enjoy keeping fit and do those things you want to do (be it sit on the sofa on your ass or make something of yourself). All you have to do is engage that lump of grey matter in your skull and make choices then have the balls to implement them.'

    bloody hippy.

    There is a definite distinction between bravery and stupidity.

    Some of us have sprogs and mortgages and credit cards and all the other government sponsored lifestyle choices we were happy to fall for, in times of plenty.

    So it ain't always a choice, we work long hours because in todays climate, your employer can always find someone cheaper, and In the possible words of Mr T 'I ain't joining no 2 million man queue.'

    So we have to complain until the ruling classes give us all 34 days off a year, and a hopefully a siesta because it ain't going to happen bottom up no mater how many balls I grow.

  47. Richard 39

    @ John 158

    Thanks for the reply.

    For the record I am not a bloody hippy, I'm a metaller, big difference.

    At the risk of starting a flame war, reading your post about Mortgages, Credit card, Kids etc it occured to me that these were choices you made in your life (and I share some of those choices, although I like to think I didn't fall for them as I am not burdened by them). I dont dare guess for one minute you woke up one day and found all those things dumped on your lap. which fits in my original post.

    I don't think it's a case of your employer finding someone cheaper, the whole costs vs quality argument would be relevant here and no employer (stuggling or otherwise) in their right mind would choose cheap, quality compromised employees over normal rate, required quailty workers: if they did, I would walk voluntarily as I refuse to work for someone with that ethic.

    If you want the 34 days off a year and a siesta, move to Spain, it is possible plan ahead, save and be wise with your money. If that philosphy makes you think I'm a hippy then I'll agree to disagree with your opinion

  48. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    I don't believe it

    No matter how knackered I am, I'm never too shagged for _that_. Even if it takes a half hour of begging, whining and cajoling to persuade the missus she ain't too tired.

    Digitally** assisted DIY is all very well, but it can't beat the Real Thing (TM).

    **Digital as in 'internet', of course, what did you perverts think I meant?

    Paris, because - well, do we need a reason?

  49. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    @Richard 39

    "I don't think it's a case of your employer finding someone cheaper, the whole costs vs quality argument would be relevant here and no employer (stuggling or otherwise) in their right mind would choose cheap, quality compromised employees over normal rate, required quailty workers: if they did, I would walk voluntarily as I refuse to work for someone with that ethic."

    Do you actually work for some one else?

    Most employers would gladly sell you and your kids and employ Chinese children if they could.

    I too am one of these who get up at stupid o'clock and commute / work / commute for 14 hours and then help look after a disabled wife. I do this because that is where I found work. I suppose I could have applied at the local supermarket or burger joint, however I trained for years to do a job that I enjoy.

    The charity that did employ me for 12 years, decided that it wanted cheaper workers so made 400 of us redundant. So I moved on to another job.

    I have a mortgage, credit cards etc. I pay bucket loads in tax and am a wealth earner for this country. I could have chosen to make the state pay for my housing, and force benefits into my wallet each week, but I preferred to work for my cash.

    So I don't have any hesitation in saying that those who did make those choices have done more to benefit this country than those who think that an adherence to a musical style to be the best thing in their lives.

    Metaller? In what way has this improved your kids lives?

  50. Richard 39

    @ AC

    Yes I do work for someone else. They are one of the top Companies in the country and the Director, my boss is a stickler for quality, performance and maintaining an excellent company profile. He recognises that to get the required results you have to pay trained and experienced staff well, paying peanuts gets monkeys and is damaging in many ways for a company. I totally agree with his philosophy and it greatly helps my lifestyle. I think its a shame that there are companies out there who choose cost effectiveness over quality, reputation and performance.

    oh and an adherence to a muscial style is a hobby, such like keeping fit and finding time to spent quality moments with the missus (in keeping with the original article topic), it is not the best thing in my life, but sure as hell beats staring at a tv screen with my brain bio-degrading thanks to the likes of Jeremey Kyle. I'll go out on a limb here and suggest you've never been to an adreanline fueled festival or gig - a harmony of thousands of people there to appreciate one thing - the music with no agendas or altercations, it's one of lifes natural highs and a perfectly acceptable past time, millions of rockers/metallers can't be wrong.

    It has been said to me that you gather all of the worst people you would fear to meet in a dark alley, bring them all together in appreciation of the same music and harmony prevails. It is true, I have seen it every year.

    and finally, how does being a metaller improve my kids lives? Seeing as it's my music choice and hobby it does not impact on the way they are raised (much the same as classical music, pop music or dare I say it rap music). My kids are schooled well on right and wrong, ethics and diversity, taught to stick to their convictions and most of all the ability to use their own common sense and intelligence to make informed (but basic - lets face it they cant vote, get credit or drive yet) lifestyle choices such as what music they like to listen to, what instruments they play, what subjects they enjoy and excel at and what sport they indulge in. They are also supported by loving Parents and Grandparents who keep them active and engaged rather than leaving them to fester in front of an LCD or loitering in the streets. In my eyes that is quite a fortunate upbringing.

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