back to article Web swoons as Jackson dies

The death of Michael Jackson yesterday brought US websites low as fans old and instant sought to confirm they were indeed experiencing their own JFK moment. Gossip site TMZ is credited with being the first to report that the 50 year old Jackson had been found unconscious at his LA home and had been taken to hospital after …


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  1. Code Monkey


    Sickipedia was also titsup as people look for jokes.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Doctors are still trying to find out whats to blame for Michael Jacksons heart attack. So far they have ruled out sunshine, moonlight and the boogie. Some think it could be hereditary originating from the Billy gene.

  3. Anonymous Coward


    Don't panic: They can now clone people memory-complete. All they need is some tissue from the nose.


  4. Lee Jackson 1


    A prophetic and probably true article unfortunatelly. Its the way it goes when a celebrity dies. I also predict Neverland will become like Graceland, the top 40 will be full of MJ music this week, and all the media that painted him as a sicko, will suddenly love him and make him a saint.

    Personally, loved his music, liked the guy, saddened. :(

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Tickets still for sale on Ticketmaster!!! states:

    Michael Jackson

    Ticketmaster is aware of the news relating to Michael Jackson. Please check here for more news.

    Find Tickets

    (looks better with the site graphics :)

  6. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: Prophetic

    Hello boys - just to let you know I shall be especially strict today (yeah, yeah) so don't bother submitting anything horrible. Lightly offensive is fine, as ever, but try and stick to the point, and if you've got a conspiracy theory or some nasty crap you simply must get off your chest then tell it to Twitter cos it's not getting past me.


  7. Rob
    Dead Vulture

    You forgot to mention...

    ... the inevitable flood of jokes that start circulating, I've already been subjected to at least 2 this morning (one was actually quite amusing and intelligent).

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    What will the O2 Arena do?

    I think they need to find an artist big enough to take on the masses that will flock to London - I think Chas and Dave! Might set them up for opening the London Olympics as well - now that is something I would pay good money to see.

    Paris - because there is no 'wheres the Jacko angle?'

  9. hugo tyson

    Google suspected DDOS attack

    ...apparantly, cos suddenly there were a huge number of searches/hour all for the same subject:

    I expected that to be El Reg's first dead Jacko story.

    Will the public's grief now move on enough that I can bring out my "I shot Lady Di" Tshirts?

  10. Tom 106

    I wonder

    If we will see more of Janet now that Mike has sadly departed?

  11. Anonymous Coward


    He really wasn't well - he had been looking very pale for a long time.

    I heard that he didn't have a heart attack at all - he had a stroke in the kids bedroom...

    Due to his unforseen death, his forthcoming dates have been cancelled. They were Kevin (aged 6) and Billy-Jo (aged 9).

    What a coincidence Micheal Jackson and Farrah Fawcett passing away on the same day - one played with majors, the other with minors.

    Mike's cremation has been cancelled - they wanted an urn full of ashes but someone pointed out to them that they'd have a puddle of plastic.

    I'm already getting my coat.

  12. Efros


    looks like its time to avoid the mainstream media for a fortnight.

    Alien icon looks like him, if you're on the same medication as I am.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture


    Does this mean the "fifty foot Michael Jackson robot" is now not going to be built?

    A tragedy in every way.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    >with its Top Ten bestselling CDs now exclusively made up of Jackson albums.

    Call me a cynic but I reckon this is Amazon pushing the CDs more than actual fact.

    As for spam, don't forget the 419ers wanting help to get his money out of Saudi Arabia, UAE or wherever it was he spent a fair bit of time.

  15. Anonymous John

    I'm waiting

    for the first 419 scam. About his trunkboxes containing several million USD in cash.

  16. Ian Ferguson

    A bit late

    Ironic that everybody's buying his music now he no longer needs the money.

  17. Kent Brockman


    I won't believe it until I see it in Black or White. I suspect the world will be having a good Cry that he's Gone Too Soon, like they did with Dirty Diana

    Anyway, I just rang Ticketmaster to get a refund, they told me to beat it.

  18. Anonymous Coward


    also tagged onto the news were the false deaths of harrison ford and jeff goldblum :)

    when you have the bbc backing you up on MJ and FF it can all seem quite convincing... or suspicious depending on your views.

  19. Neil Barnes Silver badge

    massive 40 gig comeback

    Nah. 40 gig is *so* last decade. We don't even consider less than a tera these days...

    Yes, the one with absolutely no Jackson music on the music player, thanks!

  20. Anonymous Coward

    Innocent all along?

    Only the good die young.....

    The Icon most like MJ of course..

  21. Raspy32


    It's exactly what really annoys me about the press and media in general. Jacko has been out of favour with them for some time, with people looking for any excuse to give him another knock. Now they'll be worshipping every bit of ground he ever walked on, forgetting about all the allegations of kiddy fiddling and whatever else he supposedly got up to.

    I don't like him, never liked him, and that won't change because he died. People are entitled to their opinion whatever it is, but the hypocritical nature of the media just pisses me off.

  22. Tel

    Wall to wall coverage...

    What with the news being unmitigated Jackson, wall to wall coverage, endless talking heads and children who never experienced Jackson's music at the time it was released all emoting into their twitter accounts, I wonder what awful news the Government is going to be sneaking out today....?

  23. adnim

    Michael Jackson dies...

    of suspected cardiac arrest. OK that's enough information can we move on now.

  24. Chris Bradshaw
    IT Angle

    I suppose...

    the IT angle is the '40 gig comeback'. Isn't that a little small nowadays???

    RIP, and thanks for all the music.

  25. Martin H Watson

    Elvis will stop...

    ...the internet too, when he dies.

    Mines the one with a pocket full of Sun 45 rpms.

  26. david 63

    @tom 106

    There's no more to see...

  27. Stephen Gray

    This is the only one that will get past she who must be obeyed :)

    Micheal Jackson's cause of death is believed to be hereditary. Doctors have managed to narrow it down to his billie gene.

  28. Tom 106

    ****Breaking News****

    MJ isn't dead, my mate has just phoned to say that Jackson has been seen buying a pair of moosehide moccasins over in Camden Town.

    Anyone in that area, keep your eyes peeled for him.

  29. Ian Hunter

    There go my pantalones right there

    I think I'll dust off my Bo Selecta dvds and watch the best of MJ.

    That's how I'll always remember him.

  30. david 63
    Big Brother

    Can't listen to the radio today...

    ...the smaltz is making me puke.

    [nasty stuff removed so Sarah doesn't have to spank me]

    Where's the Big Sister icon?

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Ian Ferguson

    And there's your conspiracy theory #1...

  32. Stephen Gray


    Did you hear the difference between Michael Jackson and Alex Ferguson? Ferguson will be playing Giggs in August...

  33. Anonymous Coward


    You are not kidding, I bet there is some snopping law being passed that if you listen to MJ music you are going to be monitored for your private activities...

    Either that or they are publishing the REAL figures of the MP's expenses!

    £1m on a Michael Jackson look a like costume for one MP I hear...

    RIP MJ

  34. Scott 9

    In the old days.....

    I remember when his music was the hottest thing on the chart and he was one of the early stars of MTV. I had just started college when the weirdness began with Bubbles the chimp and the rumors about sleeping in an oxygen chamber.

    Was anything about him real? Did he ever tell the truth about anything or what just fit the moment? Did he ever have a single real friend out of his army of yes men and financial backers? Eventually I was only surprised at how he just seemed to keep topping himself in being bizarre. To be honest when I first hear the news I thought it was yet another publicity stunt.

    But it still won't be over, the circus will go on. We'll have the books by anyone remotely connected to him, TV specials, and the inevitable movie. Rumors and conspiracies will continue as long as people remember his name.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Mourn theyselves

    This is where people who didn't care about Jackson when he was alive, then cry their eyes out now he's dead.

    It has more to do with the realization that no matter how rich or powerful you are, you can never cheat death.

    They are really mourning their own future passing.

  36. Tom 7

    Dont tell me this is the webs first

    white out?

  37. Prag Fest

    He's dead


  38. Rob

    Smoke and Mirrors for the BBC

    they can breathe a sigh of relief as the main story would have been BBC expenses and justifying why they pay that twat Jonathon Ross nigh on 6mil a year.

  39. OkKTY8KK5U

    Information delivery

    So, does this mean that Web 2.0 has failed to prove much of an improvement over Kurt Loder interrupting lame music videos and trying to pretend like someone worth paying attention to? In that respect, the parallels between MTV News and Web 2.0sphere are kind of interesting. Still, it's nice to know that we can all rely on the internet as a real-time information source right up until everyone wants to do that at once.

  40. captain veg Silver badge

    Re: Shocking.

    Actually it's a bit hasty to eliminate the boogie. But the good times are in the clear.


  41. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    I had a look to see if there were still many Michael Jackson tickets being resold on Ebay this morning, and a couple of of the auctions had bids for £10,000,000. No one is going to pay that was my first thought, then a colleague at work (who uses ebay) pointed out that if the auction ended with a bid that high, the buyer probably wouldn't pay, but the seller would get a Final Value bill for about £500,000 which would automatically come out of their Paypal account at the next billing point, and could take them 6-8 weeks to get it refunded.

  42. Stephen Gray

    Bored of it all now

    Self obsessed loon dies and the fooking tintarweb falls over, bet you didn't think that would happen Mr Berners-Lee...

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Get real!

    The world mourns?

    No it bloody doesn't! Get real!

  44. MinionZero

    Media feeding frenzy and the crazy surreal insecure world of showbiz...

    "while the web demonstrated that it is not always the best medium for finding out the news that really matters"

    I was watching in real time last night online and on TV as the news broke. It was very evident the TV people were using the Internet news as their main source of initial information. The first mention he died came from TMZ who were them quoted by TV people about the unconfirmed death, and then as soon as the LA Times web site joined TMZ in publishing he had (maybe) died (as yet unconfirmed), then suddenly all TV companies all jumped at the same time onto the bandwagon very evidently desperate not to be left behind in breaking the news. It was like watching a media shark feeding frenzy. They might just as well been shouting, "hey look at us" ... "hey look at us". They were all trying to out do each others news. They wanted to be first to say something new. It was blatant and yet all of them had nothing new to say before any official word was given, yet were desperately filling time asking the most insane questions to anyone they could get on the phone or in front of a camera.

    Watching the news coverage was really kind of surreal. At times the TV interviewers were lacking more than a bit of empathy, but anyway, the Internet was definitely fueling the initial information. It was amazing watching it spread in real time. I think everyone was surprised he died so suddenly and I'm sorry he is gone. The world now feels a bit more boring, without one of its top freaks on the showbiz circus freak show circuit.

    I don't however believe in holding people like him up as some kind of role model as some parts of the media are doing (thankfully The Reg isn't ... I love the comment about "fans old and instant"). He wasn't a role model he was very clearly psychologically seriously messed up and if it wasn't for his money and fame and the power that gave him, he wouldn't have been able to avoid so completely; people seeking to get him professional psychologically help. He is no role model. Endless attention seeking like him is a disorder not a virtue. So however someone like him perfects their ability to gain the attention of others, (in his case music and dance) its still driven by a disorder and still caused by a childhood lack of parental attention as with all people like him, who are usually classified as having Histrionic personality disorder (HPD). In his case, a very extreme example. So its no wonder other people with HPD will look up to someone who can gain so much world attention as a major role model. But that is no reason to emulate them. Plus as they are HPD they give very overly emotional performances on camera as they talk about him. Yes its sad he is gone, and especially so for his family, but come on, some of the fans are so way over the top. Its like they are going for some kind of Oscar performance for best grieving fan. His music was good (back 20 years ago), but I find it some what sick he is being held up by some parts of the media as some kind of top role model. Maybe they seek attention as he did and so also see him as their role model. It makes complete sense, the pattern fits and it also explains why some seek working in celebrate news media as they also want to be part of that crazy surreal insecure world.

    The irony is so often HPD people try to prevent others seeing the real reasons why they behave the way they do (and give any other explanations as cover) and thats stopping everyone else seeing how to help them have a happier life, resulting in them ending up having very unhappy lives no matter how much money and fame they get and that is also Michael Jackson legacy as much as his music, his money and his fame. Yes his music was good, but he was very mixed up and he suffered for it.

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    It's England's fault

    After you got rid of Wacky Jacqui it was only natural that Wacko Jacko had to go too.

  46. Kevin 6
    Thumb Up


    My favorite was the local news talking about his death while showing footage from Thriller when MJ was dancing as a zombie and they kept looping that segment while the reporter kept talking for 2 minutes.

  47. Cap'n wotsit


    never heard of him.

    never mind. the world turns, the sun shines, except for here where it is pi$$ing down, and I am on holiday at 5pm

  48. L 4
    IT Angle

    Michael who?

    ...deny all knowledge, just to infuriate his gushing fans.

  49. Anonymous Coward

    Forever blowing bubbles

    There's already a joke site, up since at least lunchtime, using the death to try and dump some nasty script on people's machines (www.deadmichaeljacksonjokes . c o m - no, don't look!). Quick of the mark, these cybercrim types. (Does this qualify as the most literal use of the 'Joke Alert' icon?)

    On other matters, have any dubious government announcements slipped out today, under cover of the hysteria?

  50. WhatWasThat?
    Paris Hilton


    First off, I have no doubt that "HPD" is a real psychiatric "condition". However, I would like to point out that one person's "serious illness" is another person's way of making a living - ever notice that "ADHD" didn't become "prevelent" until we had TV shows (with adverts) that cut from one thing to another quickly and computers that allowed you to do several things "at once"? If any common office worker could only do one thing at a time with email, IM, paper-shuffling, phones, etc. they would not be working very long...

    But, hysteria was common in the 1700's... It affected mostly women, and could onset on a fairly weekly or bi-weekly basis. The common cure at the time was to let the woman (or man) have an orgasm, and eventually gave way to electric assistance in the 1800's.

    The Paris Angle, because that's one angle I would continously volunteer to help "cure".

  51. Andus McCoatover


    ..has left the building.

    Damn shame, excellent musician, loved his work, and only 3 years younger than me - being AS FIT AS A BUTCHERS DOG!

  52. James O'Brien

    Ya know

    What gets me about this whole thing is not the fact people have 'forgotten' what he has been accused of, not the fact he was more plastic then human (*snickers* White Zombie song parody in the works here, you heard it here first people) but the fact that there are morons out there who are likening his death along the lines of JFK or Challenger:

    "I will always remember I was in Times Square when he died"

    "I will always remember the last time I let him molest me"*

    "Meh hes dead who cares?"*

    *Yeah ok I know only one of those is true but still.

    I am curious about one thing though. . .what do the people who accused (rightly so??) him of kiddie fiddling think about all this?

    *Best officer Barbrady voice* Move along people, there's nothing to see here!

  53. Giles Jones Gold badge

    Six to eight weeks?

    That is the time quoted to establish the cause of death?

    Seems pretty long to me, But then they have conspiracy theorists to please so they have to be thorough.

  54. Anonymous Coward

    Move along nothing to see here

    Former black man who made a fairly good album 25 years ago is dead. Nothing to see here. Move along.

  55. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    I for one did not recognise his genius of the time for the time and hope that this goes some way towards paying my respects.

  56. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    @Cap'n wotsit

    Abso-fuckin-lutely! Who actually gives a shit?

    Holiday-head on, bring on the beers!

  57. Mark Monaghan

    Michael Jackson was a musician?

    You learn something new every day.

    I guess he didn't spend all his time developing JSP and JSD then.

    Watch out for "Principles of Program Design" being re-released.

  58. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture


    As with any naysayers that couldn't care of Jackson's death, we wouldn't care if you died as well. Move along we all will but its sad to see him go so soon despite all his debt and troubles he's gotten himself into. If only he stayed true to the color of skin, he'd be in infamy.

  59. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    have the real news that is being covered up.... brace yourself.....

  60. Trokair 1
    Dead Vulture

    A small showing of couth please.

    Like him or not, please show a smidge of respect for the deceased.

    Personally, he was too strange to like the man. His music however undeniably changed the world. He was a legend in his own time and now that legend is dead. RIP MJ

  61. Jude Bradley

    Michael Jacson search

    I am aware that this is a miss-spelling above but if you seach with the above strings, it

    does reveal that 'xpantyvirus' is up and about again,

    luckily I was able to cancel this installation by clicking on the red x when my partner did a search and thus save having to remove this annoying spyware

  62. skeptical i

    Talented kid who was in the right place at the right time? Check.

    Role model, god on earth, otherwise worth the gushing hagiographies? Probably not. I'll also posit that many of the over- the- top post facto assessments are probably being used by reporters (are there any real journalists anymore?) to try to justify the 24/7 coverage since bosses might look askance at spending airtime on "Talented performer dies unexpectedly just before major concert engagement", but "World grieves sudden and untimely taking of beloved icon" should get a green light and carte blanche to hang out at shopping malls interrogating kids.

    Specific to Michael, I can't imagine that anyone raised in the spotlight since at least 5 years old would grow up WITHOUT issues; once he had enough money to build his own Hermitage, can anyone blame him for doing so? Shame he didn't spend some of that money working through his demons instead of shutting himself off from them in a lavishly appointed echo chamber, but that's hindsight for you.

    In other news, as asked earlier, what are the Gubmint no- good- niks doing now that the media spotlight is shining elsewhere?

  63. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    jesus this country, I

    swear there is a market for an actual news channel...

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