back to article PETA pronounces on Obama fly-swat

Animal rights outfit PETA has finally pronounced on the matter of Barack Obama's shock fly-swat, following considerable press pressure for clarification if the savage act of executive violence merited comparison with the Armenian Genocide. Well, the result disappointingly lacks an international poster campaign featuring a …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    lol

    This was awsome, I wish we had a PM who could swat flies.

  2. Aaron 3

    Huh.

    That's got to be the sanest thing I've ever heard a PETA representative say.

  3. Nev
    Stop

    PETA: Animal Killers & Terrorist Supporting Scum.

    'PETA's Alisa Mullins simply says of El Prez: "He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being, and human beings have a long way to go before they think before they act."'

    Really? So enlightened human being shouldn't swat flies, kill mosquitoes or any other parasite bearing insect?

    Why does El Reg give voice to these arses?

    I'm wondering what animal derived products this pampered western-world living spokesdroid uses?

    After all they have a VP who is against using animals for medical science, but is unworried about using the resulting medical breakthroughs. Hypocrites.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Phew

    now that that's sorted out I can stop holding my breath.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Arghhh

    Someone PLEASE lockup PETA and trow away the key. Its the biggest collection of psychopaths this sime of alpha centauri.

    PETA turning good principals to shit since 1980.

  6. Stef 4
    IT Angle

    Professional Help.

    Those PETA need professional psychological help, a course of appropriate medication, and (hopefully) a short spell in a rubber room.

    So nobody in PETA drives a vehicle (squashed bugs on front of car), cleans their teeth (bacteria), takes antibiotics, or uses that medicated shampoo when they have nits?

    I realise the article is tongue in cheek, but they are still a bunch of loons.

  7. Dangermouse

    PETA can go fuck themselves

    I'm sure that members of PETA slaughter millions of flys everytime they drive down the freeway.

    Hypocritical fucking idiots.

  8. sath
    Stop

    Why oh why

    I shall resist flaming over the concept of an animal rights group becoming an animal/insect rights group protecting a certain variety of insect that through many years of evolution has gained the ability to breed faster then predators can off them, though i suspect that PETA just want the publicity to try and make themselves appear in the right, as usual, silly peta.

    Killing cattle and such for no reason i can understand, one 1cm large fly in a congress hall is really pushing it for an excuse to cry Blue(bottle) murder

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Where's the "Animal" angle?

    Flies aren't animals, just like PETA isn't IT.

  10. fran 2

    "PETA files"

    Strange name for their blog http://blog.peta.org/

  11. Charles 9
    Joke

    Next thing you know...

    Some organization called the People for the Ethical Treatment of Plants and Vegetation (PETPV--pronounced "Pet Peeve") will start harping on celebrities for eating greens or stepping on the grass ("Let the plants grow in peace," they'll say). Next thing you know, we'll all starve to death because we can't eat without offending or killing *something* along the way.

  12. vegister

    PETA wouldn't like this but...

    it is widely held that mr. buddha ate meat. after all, it is tasty.

  13. Ray0x6
    Dead Vulture

    You are outdoing yourself, today!

    Famous person thwacks insect -> No story generated -> Meeja confusion -> Different famous person asked why no story generated -> Boring response hits Guardian shleb pages -> Cue further meeja confusion over public's yawning face -> Front page meta-article on El Reg -> Profit!

    I see your game, Lester!

  14. Richard Pennington 1
    Coat

    Nobody's made this comment yet, so...

    Should he have called in the SWAT team?

  15. Julian I-Do-Stuff

    Hmmm....

    I wasn't aware that enlightenment had any particular bearing on fly swatting. I thought it was all to do with biscuits.

  16. Anonymous John

    Obama

    I for one, welcome our new fly-killing overlord.

  17. Julian I-Do-Stuff
    Happy

    @Charles9

    Precisely - and the last time I made that point I was told that there are people who only eat things - such as fruit - that exist to be eaten...

    Ah... but do they shit everywhere I ask?

  18. Michael Miller

    Meat is murder

    and murder tastes pretty damn good! (Dennis Leary, No Cure for Cancer)

  19. al 12
    Paris Hilton

    I want to make a movie: PVS.

    PETA vs Scientology.

    Paris, coz she would eat a crab.

  20. disgruntled yank

    quit slacking!

    There should be a photoshopped Silverstone poster or at least Lego reenactment to accompany this story.

  21. Oddbodd
    Thumb Down

    Hmmmm....

    "He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being"

    Correct me if I'm wrong, but Buddha was a human being.

  22. Old Tom

    Re: Flies aren't animals

    Oh yes, they are. Learn your taxonomy.

    Kingdom: Animalia (animals), Phylum: Arthropoda (arthropod), Subphylum: Mandibulata (they've got mandibles), Class: Insecta (insects)

    ...and on down from there, depending on the fly (and whether it was actually a fly).

  23. Bill Fresher

    Everybody Loves Raymond

    He should have caught the fly and eaten it.... like in that EveryBody Loves Raymond episode with the Frog Girl.

  24. Scary

    RE: AC "flies aren't animals"

    Yes, they are.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    What I want to know is.....

    who is President Obama's mentor, Chuck Norris or Mr Myagi? :)

  26. Martin Lyne

    I'm a vegetarian

    I'm a veggie, and I think this is shite.

    Do they propose we don't take antibiotic, to save the bacteria? What about tapeworms, should we just grin and bear them? Parasites are animals too..

    These animals will eolve to learn not to fly in human personal-airspace, those that keep their distance propser. Those that don't. Don't.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    No surprise

    PETA is known for supporting the Liberal progressive movements of the Dems. I am in no way surprised that they would no cry fowl and call for a formal apology from our Socialist, er..... Democratic, president.

  28. Dan Price

    @stef4

    Why only a short spell?

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Be thankful that...

    ...John Prescott isn't president or PM. One good left hook and any annoying insect (or higher annoying life form, protester, journalist etc) will be in trouble.

    IT angle to this story? I'm sure someone will bring out a flash game or fly-swat simulator.

    PETA? Have they already eradicated animal cruelty so they have nothing important left to do other than comment on trivia?

    I swat flies. If they are in the house I give them the chance to leave but if they refuse to comply with the open window, they get bashed. It's acceptable behaviour with police forces, so it must be ok with insects.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re:poster campaign

    Without (playmobil) photos it didn't happen. Oh...

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    David Icke's going to be disappointed

    If his theory's correct, Obama should have zapped the bug with a prehensile tongue.

  32. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge
    Boffin

    Shades of GKC...

    " Some organization called the People for the Ethical Treatment of Plants and Vegetation (PETPV--pronounced "Pet Peeve") will start harping on celebrities for eating greens or stepping on the grass ("Let the plants grow in peace," they'll say). Next thing you know, we'll all starve to death because we can't eat without offending or killing *something* along the way."

    Chesterton (as usual) was prescient in this field. Here is a paragraph from 'The Napoleon of Notting Hill":

    "Then there was the opposite school. There was Mr. Edward Carpenter, who thought we should in a very short time return to Nature, and live simply and slowly as the animals do. And Edward Carpenter was followed by James Pickie, D.D. (of Pocohontas College), who said that men were immensely improved by grazing, or taking their food slowly and continuously, after the manner of cows. And he said that he had, with the most encouraging results, turned city men out on all fours in a field covered with veal cutlets. Then Tolstoy and the Humanitarians said that the world was growing more merciful, and therefore no one would ever desire to kill. And Mr. Mick not only became a vegetarian, but at length declared vegetarianism doomed ("shedding," as he called it finely, "the green blood of the silent animals"), and predicted that men in a better age would live on nothing but salt. And then came the pamphlet from Oregon (where the thing was tried), the pamphlet called "Why should Salt suffer?" and there was more trouble...."

    (the 'technical content' here is English Literature, but still likely to require degree-level education...)

  33. Doug Glass
    Go

    In Support of PETA Principles

    Animals certainly have their place ... right next to the mashed potatoes. Flies and mosquitoes find an "expanded" role on the swatter as usual.

  34. Paul Hates Handles

    PETA are cunts.

    Seriously, wasting time over a fly? Their main purpose is to eat shit and lay larvae. There's millions of the bastards.

    Shit, send him a fucking great big flame-thrower for taking MORE of the little bastards out.

    Once PETA stop killing animals themselves and using products tested on animals... they can still shut the fuck up!

  35. Barry 13
    Joke

    Change of campaign

    Yes, apparently PETA has decided not to repeat the Alicia Silverstone campaign after it led to several incidents of monkeys being spanked.

  36. Lykofos
    Flame

    Sheesh, not again!

    A few years ago, I worked at an outlet of the natural foods chain "Wild Oats" in the US (since swallowed up by Whole Foods). I had to work alongside some PETA members. These idiots (I would use something MUCH stronger but minors maybe reading) tried to get the meat department shut down. They failed. Those of us working the grocery, deli and meat departments used to annoy them endlessly by chowing down on animal based treats (provided by the dead animal department and cooked up by those of us in the deli). All of those PETA members worked as cashiers and wore their little "Meat is Murder" buttons on their company issued shirts.

    Seeing PETA jumping on Obama for using an electric shock fly swatter does not surprise me. They want him to catch the fly and release it somewhere else? What about a mosquito carrying malaria or plague fleas? Sorry PETA, I will stick with the "swap first, ask questions" later method of pest control. To be quite frank, PETA needs to remove themselves from the food chain since they don't understand our part in it (aka pinnacle predator in most areas unless there is something larger and toothier hanging around). I suggest a large fire...

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    @Julian I-Do-Stuff

    "Precisely - and the last time I made that point I was told that there are people who only eat things - such as fruit - that exist to be eaten...

    Ah... but do they shit everywhere I ask?"

    Hmm, interesting point from the tree-huggers. Fortunately, many animals exist to be eaten. How the fuck do you thing predators survive? Ever been to the African Savanna and watched a vast herd of wildebeest get attacked by a predator? Maybe a crocodile or a lion?

    Fuckwits like PETA's Alisa Mullins should be taken out to the Savanna to spend some time explaining to a lion what being at the top of the food chain is all about.

  38. breakfast Silver badge
    Flame

    Hoist

    Oh Petards, how you constantly manage to be the single most irritating pressure group out there.

    Except maybe for the anti-womens-rights "mens rights" people.

    But worse than the denialists and the creationists.

    Nobody likes a bunny fascist.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Next on the agenda..

    stopping Lions from killing innocent antelope!

    PETA = FAIL

  40. A B 3
    Stop

    "He isn't the Buddha,"

    O M Gawd... He just wasted some S E Asian mass murderer by their reckoning.

    I have nothing against flies btw. Think of the poo that is going start piling up, due to them being one man short. Will humanity never learn?

  41. kain preacher

    Hmm

    I what PETA says when and animals eats human?

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    We all kill to eat

    vegetarians just kill stuff that can't run away.

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    People Eating Tasty Animals

    'nuf said.

  44. 3kids2cats1dog
    Flame

    Where was the secret service?

    The secret service protecting the president should all be fired! What if the fiy was an Al Qudia sleeper fly, send to assassinate the Prez! Shame!

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    @AC 10:09

    "PETA turning good principals to shit since 1980."

    My principal in high school actually was pretty shit, but I don't think PETA had anything to do with it.

  46. Jacob Reid
    Coat

    I have a better idea

    We can swat PETA members instead. They are even more annoying than flies, and I bet more satisfying to swat.

    Mine's the one with the PETA member swatter in the pocket.

  47. A B 3
    Black Helicopters

    Black Fly Down

    PETA woman to PETA Man (pun intended): We have a black fly down, we have black fly down.

    Pass the (joke) ammo.

  48. John Savard

    They're Dangerous

    Houseflies spread typhoid fever, so I would think of the humans rather than the flies.

  49. ian 22

    How do you pronounce that?

    Is Obama the Lord of the Flies? Unlike Clinton, who was the Lord of the Fries.

  50. Dave Morris

    Thank goodness...

    That certain breeds of cattle, pigs, and chicken exist for the sole purpose of eating... I'll stick to that diet

  51. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    its only a fly

    Hundreds of thousands of people die every day from torcher, famine, war and these assholes are making a big issue about a fly. I'd like to see any animal rescue these assholes when they're in trouble, not to mention the billions of healthy animals they've killed humainly to end their suffering. Oh and wheres the IT angle on this or did he chuck his blackberry at it to kill it.

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Blake ... says it perfectly.

    Little Fly

    Thy summers play,

    My thoughtless hand

    Has brush'd away.

    Am not I

    A fly like thee?

    Or art not thou

    A man like me?

    For I dance

    And drink and sing

    Till some blind hand

    Shall brush my wing.

    If thought is life

    And strength and breath;

    And the want

    of thought is death;

    Then am I

    A happy fly,

    If I live,

    Or if I die.

  53. Nordrick Framelhammer

    @ian22

    No, Clinton was Lord of the Lowered Flies

  54. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    More Alicia

    Enough of this animal rights stuff, lets fix the link to the Alicia video so that we can all enjoy the beauty of animals,

  55. Rosco

    Clearly not a popular stance but ...

    ... personally, I prefer not to kill insects without a decent reason. I don't go to any great lengths to avoid it but to me anything living is an entity of such wonderful complexity that it's just petty vandalism to snuff it out without decent cause. Pissing me off by repeatedly flying in my face usually feels like decent cause, at least at the time. Also, feasting on my tomato plants is a casus belli.

  56. Fred 18
    Paris Hilton

    PETA

    When are the stupid people going to get a life. Next they will want to ban fly swatters. What about the cock roach's are we allowed to step on one now. Wait I hear a knock on my door, could it be PETA wanting to confiscate my mouse traps.

    Give me a break

  57. Somebody shoot me
    Stop

    Oh please

    PETA... get a life!!!

  58. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    @Next thing you know...

    There's already such a thing.

    They''re called new age retro hippies.

    You know, someone should put those PETA folks on a sealed plane then let loose a box of venomous snakes, malaria-bearing mosquitoes and African Tsetse flies. Let's see how they handle that.

    Skull and crossbones. Because Sportacus from Lazytown just called me a pirate.

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