LOL
Some of the other things they offer look great... Rave and Kangoo for instance!
However, bashing a chav will probably just get you banged up for assault or something :(
London gym floors hoodies with Chav Fighting classes
A London gym is offering decent, hard-working citizens the chance to fight back against the hooded hordes of chavdom by administering alcopop-crazed yoof a righteous thrashing - courtesy of its "Chav Fighting" classes. According to Gymbox's blurb, you'll learn "how to take a Bacardi off a hoodie and turn a grunt into a whine" …
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 15:43 GMT Alain Moran
Thats just too much
I have to take exception to "fire an AK47 at the feet of an immigrant worker who's stolen your job" ... it is racist comments like that which give the BNP a foothold in this country.
One of the greatest strengths of the UK is its ability to adsob other cultures and grow as a result, making racist comments like that and expecting them to be acceptable is undermining the strength of our great nation.
I'm sorry but if you have the attitude that you are better than anybody else in this country then you should track down your ancestry and piss off back to where you came from.
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 15:49 GMT Elmer Phud
Empty Hand
The half-brick at ten paces always beats some posturing twat.
It's something that a martial arts instructor friend has always maintained as he's had to turn away several people who 'want to be protected and feel safe'. Give them a bit of an idea and they are immediate experts who end up in hospital, if they are lucky. They usually last as long as the "So, what do you do if someone with a knife demands your wallet?" they ask. "Give them the wallet, it can be replaced. Break their neck and you end up inside."
That and the first kick in the nuts usually wins.
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 15:49 GMT Sarah Bee
Re: Thats just too much
See, I was going to take pity on you and reject that, but then...
I'll let everyone else explain it to you in words of one non-racist syllable, but suffice to say, it was a satirical play on the quite literally aggressive marketing of the gym. Read it again. See?
Incidentally, the author of this article is an immigrant. You, on the other hand, are a silly boy.
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 16:20 GMT Luis Ogando
@ Alain Moran
Alain. It's people like YOU that have succesfully removed humans' God-given right to laugh at themselves as well as others. Well done. Feel free to languish in you 'holier-than-thou' ambience and enjoy the (very limited) amount of reaction this retort has afforded you.
Glad to be of service.
You twat!
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 23:14 GMT Pierre
How dare you?
"those hospital beds not filled with dying pig plague victims"
There seems to be humongous amounts of irony embedded in this sentence (far more than in a luminous wristwatch I would say). How dare you mock the very serious apocalyptic hyper-pandemic that is going to kill the whole humanity (and then some)? Are you trying to ruin the pharmaceutical industry? Are you a TERRORIST?
On the other hand, I heard this morning from a government-linked source that the number of knife attacks by recombinant bird-swine viral particles is on the rise. A classified document from the US department of Homeland Security reports possible links with islamist killer bananas from Costa Rica. Be vigilant!
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 23:14 GMT Martin
@Thats just too much
>I have to take exception to "fire an AK47 at the feet of an immigrant worker who's stolen your job"
I think it's terrible that we are reduced to using foreign guns to fire at the feet of our immigrants.
In my day we used proper British guns.
Goes off to write to the Telegraph......
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 23:14 GMT Anonymous Coward
It's just an advert...
for the gym, no? How much
It's not an article at all. How much did they pay for this?
Endorsing beating the crap out of poor, ill educated kids is hardly the way forward. Self defence, fine, but... is a `chav` someone who deserves a kicking just for being a `chav`? Yes, we all know the Reg is wonderfully tongue in cheek, ironic, and clever and yada yada but does that mean you can say whatever you like?
Encouraging white collars to bash poor kids is pretty sad.
Oh and yes, I've read the Reg for years thanks, and I do `get it`.
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Tuesday 28th April 2009 23:18 GMT call me scruffy
Shhhh, don't feed the troll.
Moran is quite clearly a wordplay on "Moron". Either that or it's a perl script that unleashes a paragraph of rhetoric whenever it sees a suitable trigger.
To be honest the worst thing about a surveilance society is that the Real Life muppets like that would use it to lock up every risque joker for life.
Mines the one with the copy of children of men in the pocket
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Wednesday 29th April 2009 09:18 GMT storng.bare.durid
Is this gym for real?
Honestly, can anyone confirm this place is real and not satire? lol
And .. what's the IT slant? There ain't even downloadable saucy vids :P
Misc comments.
1, Disappointed I could not see 'Boob Aerobics'. *wonders at what that might entail*
2. Nike-Fu is under-rated. This is real imba if you can pull it off.
3. 'Glaswegian kisses' have been known to backfire. Useful? yeah but last resort technique for sure. Especially for sickly nerdy PFY's who've never taken a hit to their heads before.
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Wednesday 29th April 2009 11:04 GMT Anonymous Coward
Re: Is this gym for real?
Yes, I'm a member there.
I take some of the boxing classes, but not any of the ones mentioned. They exist though. Also, if you go at the right time of day you can get a good vantage point on boob aerobics from the treadmills. I'm not sure they'll let you in under the guise of "I thought it said moob aerobics" though.
This topic is closed for new posts.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
