back to article Google debuts JavaScript playground

If you haven't been following the browser wars in the last few months, JavaScript engines are now the hot new thing to showboat ... unless, of course, you're Microsoft and have the kind of market share where you don't need to worry about what benchmarking nerds think. But for Microsoft's loyal rivals, JavaScript engines are …


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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    "we say they are the cat's meow - which is an American expression meaning AWESOME. "

    And "Awesome" is an American expression meaning what?

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    cat's meow == AWESOME???

    Gag me with a fucking spoon.

  3. amanfromMars Silver badge

    MasterClasses in Space Racing NIRobotICQ Technologies/Virtualised Binary Algorithms*


    What you can be sure of, and it is a sobering thought to think of, as much as we may know/think we know about the present state of all present state of the art systems of power and control/SCADA, and Web Browsers,..... which one would do well to Realise, Present You with Virtual Worlds with News and Views brought to Life and Shared Digitally over Networks InterNetworking for and of a Crazed Reality on Earth, which is Chaos Creatively Controlled and Phormed by Shadowy Special Forces and/or Royal and Ancient Secret Societies and/or New World Order War Profiteers and/or Money Makers and their Bankers and Backers and/or Media Moguls Spinning Tales and/or Computer Programs which Sublimely Brain Wash Humanity with Advanced IntelAIgents from the Void and Vaults of CyberSpace and Viable Imagination .... is that it is always the case, and it is Perfectly and very Clearly Explained with the V8 Performance Engine analogy, that as Advanced as Cutting Edge Technology may be considered to be in the most advanced of countries/companies, somewhere there are always Performance Engines BetaTesting in the Field, New Systems for a Future Imagined and already Building in W16 Configuration....... as there are always Forces at Work of which One will Never know Anything as they Prepare the Future WAI Ahead.

    But they do Spin Out New Technologies and Virtual Services to Assist in Man's Travels through Time and ITs Spaces and also Provide Global Operating Device Messengers so that the Path can be Universally Shared for All to Follow with their Leads and Help IT Build and Create with Unshakeable Beliefs in what is Revealed to Be Truly Imagined.

    * AIMacro/Parallel Future dDevelopment of and for "Microsoft's event-driven programming language Visual Basic, and associated integrated development environment (IDE), which is built into most Microsoft Office applications." .... .... with Intense and Extensive Suites of IntelAIgently Designed Entities ........ which some may consider is a Core Worm/Kernel Trojan/Sweet and Sticky Honey Trap Door into the Key Vault.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Pass the bucket

    "From Google's new Chrome Experiments project:

    We think JavaScript is awesome. We also think browsers are awesome. Indeed, when we talk about them, we say they are the cat's meow - which is an American expression meaning AWESOME."

    I'm not sure whether reading this or drinking a pint of salted water would be a faster way to induce vomiting. And some people still think Google is cool?

  5. WinHatter
    Thumb Down

    Full potential

    I can now see the full potential to get a quote for my auto insurance.

    Useful as an ashtray on a motorbike.

  6. bothwell


    "the cat's meow - which is an American expression meaning AWESOME"

    They've taken the already awesome phrase "the dog's bollocks" and made it suck.


  7. Mike Flugennock

    Aside from JavaScript being scary these days as it is... internal bullshit alarms are clanging simply because that quote from Google contains the word "awesome" too many times for my comfort.

  8. Mark Rendle


    I suspect the next IE JavaScript engine will involve .NET 4.0, with the all-new, all-singing, all-dancing CLR and DLR, and will probably make Javascript interchangeable with IronPython, IronRuby and any other language available with added Iron.

    Which means it won't land until after those do, and I'm still waiting for my not-in-a-VM beta of VS2010 so that's looking more and more like next year.

  9. Kanhef

    Video is dead

    "No longer available" now [18:23 EDT]

  10. Alex Carter

    Stop it Google

    We think discussing technical subjects like a half-baked stoner is patronizing. We also think Google are taking the piss. Indeed, when we talk about them, we never say they are the dog's bollocks - which is an British expression meaning AWESOME.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Microsoft not interested in performance?

    Seems an odd statement given their recent puff piece about how much faster IE was compared to FF and Opera etc.

  12. David Gosnell

    "Awesome" ...

    ... how utterly this stuff brought a perfectly decent PC to its knees.

  13. lansalot

    cool !


    I'm working on an artificial-anti-intelligence program just now - could you kindly share the sourcecode for your comments generator please ? Many thanks in advance :)

  14. Colin Millar

    Wait a minute???

    Nope - its 2009 - I didn't just dream a decade.

    I have this great new idea for presenting web pages called framesets - I bet I could sell it to a web2ard.

    onMouseover.showbogusurl; onClick.PROFIT

  15. DJ

    Internet Explorer browser share

    The opening premise seems to be incorrect.

    IE7 25.4%

    IE6 17.4%

    IE8 0.8%

    Firefox 46.4%

    Chrome 4.0%

    Safari 3.0%

    Others 2.2%

  16. Andrew Moore


    Awesome- means it only contains some awe. I think the term they are looking is "awe-full" which means it's full of awe.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Well done for not spotting that w3schools is a techie site and its likely that only people visiting it will be other techies/people doing web development.

    So the results will likely be skewed AWAY from ie because of that, do the same tests on a sports site for example adn ti would probably be a lot less firefox.

    Why do the IE haters not get the idea of market segements?

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Those stats from w3schools, as has been stated, are well and truly scewed. My work website has just under 80% IE browser visits - about a quarter of which are still IE6 or older.

    IE8 is still fairly rubbish (I've been using it since beta) - but to be fair to MS - it is LESS rubbish than any previous version... personally I'd be quite happy if MS forced a browser update out automatically and finally killed off most of those ancient IE installs still plaguing the web.

  19. Ron
    Gates Halo

    Cats are AWESOME

    I can't wait to be able to pass a bouncing ball across windows, its gonna be so cool!

    Wait a minute its gonna be AWESOME! (bit like a cat's meow)

  20. amanfromMars Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    The Horny Devil Guardian Angel ..... Love's Messenger ?

    "I'm working on an artificial-anti-intelligence program just now - could you kindly share the sourcecode for your comments generator please ? Many thanks in advance :)" ... By lansalot Posted Monday 23rd March 2009 09:58 GMT

    But of course we could, lansalot, but the eternal questions are always should we? I am at a loss to conclude other than the result of an anti-intelligence program, whether artificial or otherwise, would be a certifiable madness, and as such, in such would there be no great interest or lucrative funding streams. Although should it be otherwise, then one could and/or would be Tempted with such Artificial Rewards to ...... well, Hexplore the Field for the Sheer Hell of IT. It may offer certain Divine Attractions of the Flesh to Compensate for any Challenge or Assaults on the Soul ...... :-)

    And Paris .... a Tasty Morsel or Tasteless Hottie and a Nottie? Although why would the World even want to know, other than to keep itself amused and abused.

  21. Justin

    I suppose...

    It's too late to ask web designers to stop bogging their pages down in horrid, bloated crap?

    New java engines that don't gag (yet) are an encouragement they clearly don't need

  22. Waggers

    re:Internet Explorer browser share

    That's a big story - since January 2009, Firefox's user share has been higher than all versions of IE combined. The problem is, the stats are based only on visitors to W3schools - who tend to be web developers, who tend to use standards compliant browsers. Unfortunately it's not an overall indicator of browser usage.

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