I can see the souvenirs now...
"Kiss me qvick - or I vil have you shot!"
The reason Hitler didn't do the decent thing and order his Luftwaffe to reduce Blackpool to smouldering rubble has now been revealed: The Fuhrer wanted the resort as his "personal playground", as the Daily Mail puts it. Adolf's chilling plan to watch triumphant troops goosestep down the Golden Mile before hoisting a swastika …
I can only assume this was at a time before they started pumping raw sewage into the sea, and started building row-upon-row or oh so delightful trinket shops? I can how it could work though - the place is like a concentration camp anyway.
And to all those people from Blackpool who are going to complain - It's a dump. Accept it.
...taken apart and shipped back to Germany. as well. He was a closet pie-eater basically.
Blackpool isn't irredeemably shit, it just attracts a lot of people who think they can behave like arseholes just because it's Blackpool. You could say that about anywhere where they allow lots of British people to get horribly drunk.
It is not surprising that the Mail paints Hitler as "almost eccentric and cuddly"; they supported Hitler right up until the 1938 invasion of Prague by the Nazis. Rothermire (the owner) expressing the hope that 'Adolf the Great' would become a popular figure in Britain, (from Wikipedia) and wrote an article entitled: "Hurrah for the Blackshirts," in January, 1934.
Love it. Can I come and work with you lot? It would make my days everso more interesting.
I'm good at making tea and everything... I'll even buy the biscuits. My only demand would be that you seat me well away from that "Ms Bee" as she's just a bit odd and I wouldn't want, by process of osmosis - to catch whatever mental disease she has.
It could explain why the owners of Blackpool pleasure beach tried to call a new coaster 'The Zyklon Loop' a few years ago...
Oh, Ms Bee, most disappointed,although I can see the attraction of Fox's crinkle thingies I had you down as a chocolate hob nob kind of girl.
Paris, I bet she likes a hobnob with her cuppa.
And you give very good subhead too, Ms Bee. Sehr gut. I, for one, celebrate the Register as an environment where punerasts and double-entendrists are permitted, nay encouraged, to express themselves without shame and free from the discrimination and abuse they suffer in the rest of society.
I can't help thinking that a donkey ride on the beach might have seemed a bit tame after waging blitzkrieg across Europe.
>Oh do shut up. The worst bit of Britain is that bit where Brits have gathered in any numbers to live
Hell is other people ?
Have to agree a little tho, peace is only attained at 11pm on a summers evening above 2000ft in the Lake district mountains in my case. If only I could ship the bloody noisy sheep off to Blackpool where they belong ....
Let us not forget how many people died in that war !
I don't mean to berate any of you, and as we all know we have some shithole towns in this country.
The fact of the matter is that horrendous numbers of people were killed in the most evil/inhumane ways. And for what ?
The guys on our side fought for freedom from oppression so we could say what we wanted and do the same. What have we got now ? Anti terror laws which pretty much allow you to be locked up indefinitely without appeal ? Hmmm doesn't seem too far from precisely what our guys fought against ? I don't want to see anyone killed but if we keep on ratcheting up the anti-terror law/response we will all be living in single cages and fed shit until we vote labour, which is now without the cage. Sooner or later it will be an offence to vote anything other than labour. mugabe has been teaching brown a thing or two I will have you know ..... which really does provide an accurate forecast for our economy.
If you want to express a complaint about the current shithole status of your town :-
lodge a complaint with your local council who will express their delight at your feedback
vote 'em out
take them out in a field and have them shot with PFY frozen paintballs (BOFH)
then bury the useless fuckers in one of the many potholes in the roads they are charged to maintain.
Thank you for freedom of speech !
"Blackpool isn't irredeemably shit, it just attracts a lot of people who think they can behave like arseholes just because it's Blackpool. You could say that about anywhere where they allow lots of British people to get horribly drunk."
Yeah, it's commonly known as Great Britain or the UK.
I could take issue with a lot of what Homard says however one burning question stands out - Should the word 'shithole' be hyphenated?
It always looks to my like it has an aspirated 'th' when written as one word and 'shit hole' should be reserved for the Eton-Cambridge-Civil Service set. Surely 'shit-hole' is clearer as far as pronunciation is concerned though where I come from in the glorious Midlands 'shit'ole' might be more appropriate.
Your thoughts please.
"Another fucking awful day! That useless pair of incompetant bastards Speer and Hess have done it to me again. 'We have a great weekend for you Mein Fuhrer. You're going to love it Mein Fuhrer. It'll be the best weekend away ever Mein Fuhrer. It's what you've always wanted Mein Fuhrer.' Sycophantic, snivelling little wankers the pair of them. You know where we went? Fucking Nuremberg. AGAIN! BASTARDS!!
All I want is a weekend by the sea, donkey rides, maybe a rollercoaster. A deckchair on the beach and a glass of warm beer. Full English breakfast and a landlady like Benito Mussolini would be nice. What do I get? Thousands of fucking people carrying fucking torches *and* I have to make a fucking speech! What sort of holiday is that? It's a bloody good thing I don't trust them and packed my best uniform 'just in case'. I felt like a right arsehole changing out of my swimming trunks, flipflops and knotted hanky backstage though, I don't mind saying. Nobody laughed, but I'll bet the miserable fuckers all wanted to.
Note to self: That's it. As nobody else round here can organise a pissup in a sodding brewery I'm planning everything myself from now on.
I wonder what the seaside resorts are like in Poland? I'll have a look at the map tomorrow"........
After watching "The Nazis: A Warning From History", it is really quite frightening how a series of circumstances can lead to an unhinged dictator taking over a modern western democracy.
Even more frightening is that you can see the same conditions starting to be met here and now. We have an incompetent and deeply unpopular government (who are slowly eroding our civil liberties in the name of "security", providing the infrastructure needed for a police state dictatorship). We have a limp wristed and equally incompetent Opposition. We have a worsening economic and employment situation and an extreme right-wing party waiting in the wings (BNP) who are pandering to people's fears regarding jobs and immigration.
Yes, I know its very unlikely, but five years ago I would have said it was was *impossible* that such a thing could happen here. You can actually imagine people standing in a polling booth thinking, "Labour, not again, no way. Conservative, don't make me laugh, bunch of naughty schoolboys. Lib-Dem, too left-wing for me. BNP? Hell, what have I got to lose?"
And its the New Labour eeejits that have brought us to this.
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Nah. Anywhere French Canadian. I've been in them there parts many times and a bigger shit hole(s) you couldn't dream about. Montreal. Pah! Urinating on it would be doing it a favour.
Actually, if you're referring to the gentle folk from the eastern part of our Glorious Capital, you'll find that the glottal stop is, errr, stopped. The 't' is quite pronounced. The aitch may be dropped of course. That most illustrious of gentlemen, Alan Ford, AKA 'Bricktop' from Snatch exemplifies the vernacular, heard to good advantage here:
Fifty years ago I moved into a new house in a town in New Zealand and a Pom moved in next door.
He said that he had moved 12,000 miles to get away from Poms and he had ended up surrounded by them.
True , lots of Poms and Dutchmen left Europe for NZ , as Europe looked like a shit heap at that time, due to Adolf.
A little light googling confounds expectations regarding the Mail's Hitler/Nazi obsession:
Daily Mail - 14,800 occurrences
Telegraph - 15,900 occurrences
Guardian - 21,000 occurrences
D.M. - 33,000
Telegraph - 16,400
Guardian - 33,000
Not sure whether this is a function of the relative sizes of the websites. It's hard to estimate the quantity of Nazi/Hitler material as a percentage of the whole.
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