back to article iPhones will win the war in Afghanistan, says NATO chief

The head of the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation (NATO), Jaap de Hoop Scheffer, has said that progress is being made in the international community's battle against terror in Afghanistan - and that progress is being made by iPhones. Delivering a speech yesterday at the Brussels-based Security and Defence Agenda thinktank, …


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  1. Jessica Werkz

    ..morale-sapping fanboi contagion spreading any further

    Gimmee a break..................

  2. gjw
    Jobs Horns

    So what he actually wants from Finland is...

    to join the Nato and start spreading Nokia superiority.

  3. Anonymously Deflowered
    Thumb Up

    "morale-sapping fanboi contagion"


  4. SkippyBing

    What contract are they on?

    If it's better than I can get with O2 it might be worth a shopping trip...

  5. Matt D

    Of course...

    Spreading rabid consumerism, that's the answer. Why wasn't that thought of earlier?

  6. Jaap Stoel
    Paris Hilton

    Bloodie cloggies

    Makes me ashamed to be one...

    Paris because De Hoop Scheffer and she are probably related. Or share the same intellect.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The thing to remember is

    the iPhone is actually high-tech over there.

  8. Shaun


    What if it's a cheap chinese knockoff?

  9. Secretgeek

    Two things.

    First, 'Afghan fellow'? Did he at this point twirl a bushy moustache and get his boy to fetch whatever the Finnish equivalent of brandy?

    Second, he does realise all the guy was doing was downloading the Sniper Shot Calculator App recently featured on this here Reg?

  10. David Evans

    @Matt D

    You say that like its a bad thing. I still say the Americans would have won in Vietnam if they'd dropped fridges instead of bombs. And the Berlin Wall only came down because everyone in East Berlin wanted a Mercedes.

  11. theotherone
    Thumb Up


    buying an iphone in Afghanistan would cost a year's wages the dude using it was probably a drug lord .... so much for progress eh?

  12. Seán

    Oho the war crazed bastard

    Why doesn't the shithead do what the people of Europe want which is to get the fuck out of Afghanistan and Iraq and leave the yanks to their own stupid pointless murder spree. Maybe a few explosions on public transport wherever jaap boy is from will settle his cough.

  13. lglethal Silver badge
    Thumb Down

    @ Sean

    You seem to have an incredibly short memory - lets refresh it.

    The entirety of the western world (which includes almost everyone within NATO, so thats you Europeans, the yanks, the canadians, the aussies, the kiwis, and well anyone else you can think of that classifies as "the West") agreed to go into Afghanistan after 9/11. I believe there was even a UN resolution allowing the action. And to be honest i don't think there was that much public dissatisfaction with the idea. So saying you never wanted to be there in the first place is a crock of sh*t!

    Iraq on the other hand is a completely different story...

    But remember the article is about Afghanistan, not Iraq... I know there easy to mix up - just ask George Dubya...

  14. ratfox
    Paris Hilton

    He forgot one little detail

    The only way an Afghan can afford an iPhone is by:

    - corruption,

    - growing opium for heroin, or

    - selling weapons to Talibans.

    Now, which of the three was it?

    PH, I bet she'll win the war too

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    @ sean

    hmm perhaps you can go tell people in london and NYC that their loved ones werent killed by they were disadvantaged, misunderstood freedom fighters from broken homes.

    Or some other handwringing piss like that

    Glad the current crop of handwringers weren't around during WW2....heck we would all be speaking german and Japanese and learning why democracy and Judaism are evil. Though almost happened due the spinelessness of Europe generally, lets appease wonder we have chavs and neds everywhere....appeasement instead of enforcement.

    Yet before 9/11 a lot of you hand wringers were parping on about how we should do something for the poor oppressed afghans, now we do, your upset as we went further than a sing song and a vague petition.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    "What if it's a cheap chinese knockoff?"

    Carpet bombing.

  17. Mart


    Bet the little bugger stole it of a western soldier, seriously do they even have apple store out there?

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wow 1 Afghan has an iPhone

    Mentioning this one iPhone actually weakens De Hoop Scheffer's point of general progress in Afghanistan.

    And the comparison with his own 5 year old NATO phone shows what an incredible tart he really is.

  19. Rob

    Bless ole Scheffer

    I think it was more his attempt at being hip, trendy, cool, down with the kids, innit?

    (I had a few more, but due to being in my 30's I'm not young enough to know how to spell them).

    Mine's the one that looks Emo enough to wear ;)

  20. Jon Pick

    Seduce them with shiny toys

    A cunning plan.

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