130,000 inflatable jubs missing at sea

An Australian men's mag has asked beachcombers to keep a sharp eye out for inflatable breasts after 130,000 pneumatic chesticles went awol en route from Beijing to Sydney. Ralph had intended to to distribute the tits free with its January issue, but while the AU$200,000 cargo apparently left China a couple of weeks back, when …

[Dave Ross]

Tip-off?

fails dismally to restrain self from commenting on whether it should really be called a tip-off...

[Simon Neill]

Warning....

Not to be used as a flotation device!

[Anonymous Coward]

Someone, somewhere...

...is satisfying a fetish right now. Scrooge McDuck-like, substitute gold with chesticles. My mind is generating pictures I'd rather not see. Hammer time...

[Anonymous Coward]

I'd like to make a couple of points..

The sea around Oz shouldn't be nippy this time of year.

The loss of these will leave Ralph feeling very deflated.

[Anonymous Coward]

Joke

Thanks for the mammaries, or not in this case

[dervheid]

Please keep us...

abreast of any developments here, whilst I nip out for a moment.

[Matt Smart]

I'm sure...

...that the bloke responsible for this "feels a bit of a tit right now".

Mine's the one with the... meh, I don't have anything in my pockets.

[Paul Murphy]

IF they left China in the first place of course.

After all, just saying you sent them out is a great way of getting paid without doing any work, and it makes your figures look good.

If the Chinese can put melamine into babies milk I doubt there would be any scruples to stop them from lying about sending stuff off.

PH cos her chesticles look good (enough) anyway.

[Anonymous Coward]

thank you for keeping me...

.... abreast of the situation.

mines the one with the nipple clamps.

[Tom]

Sorry,

I've had a melt down with all the available punning and mirth that can be derived from this story, so therefore i can't do the subject matter any justice in this medium. I'm sorry, there will be no word play issued from the buero today.

[James]

Could this really...

.. be the peak (or twin peaks) of human endeavour?

If there's anything needed to convince dolphins that they are actually the most advanced species on the planet this is it.....

[Anonymous Coward]

Boobs on the beach!

Who can/should complain?

[Anonymous Coward]

Anyone trying to grab a couple of these

Ought to be sure to tell them apart from Portugese Men'o'war and other lethal jellyfish species. Perhaps a few tips from Lewis are in order?

[Christoph]

That kind of delivery problem ...

Can really get on your tits.

[Martin Lyne]

This article

is no good without (satellite) pictures.

[Yorkshirepudding]

not a case of

titsup but titsoverboard

[Andus McCoatover]

Lovely Jubbly!

(Title says it all...)

[Anonymous Coward]

Please, please, please, please...

...stop using the word 'chesticles'. It makes you look like frat boys. And what ever happened to Bulgarian Airbags, anyway?

[Rusty Warrior]

titter

ye not!

[Disco-Legend-Zeke]

JUBBIES are NOT BOOBIES

Jubbies are the dinples in the legs now renamed cellulete.

Paris has the latter, newly installed, perhaps, but not the former as far as i can see.

[Marvin the Martian]

A$4.3 billion??

Isn't there a floating-point error there, say 3 places?

[Martin Glenn]

I think I know where some are!

Some have turned up in the UK following a short stint in the outback,

oh sorry appears that these plastic ones were actually attached to Nicola Mclean.

[James]

Basic geography tells the answer

“"Unless Somali pirates have stolen them”

Ok the ship left China and was heading to Sydney – if there is even a remotest possibility of Somali pirates have stolen them the ship would have been going completely the wrong way

[Charles Manning]

Went down

Like the Tit anic.

[Mike Powers]

Endangered species?

This should help with the repopulation of Blue-Footed Boobies...

[Dave]

To the theme to Jaws

Jub jub Jub jub Jub jub Jub jub Jub jub.....

[hexacet]

a disaster of tit-anic proportions?

"a disaster of tit-anic proportions?"

no comment just an idea for a by-line...