back to article BBC's speak you're branes collapses under Brand-Ross sex outrage

The BBC's "Have Your Say" online comment forum briefly collapsed this afternoon as the entire population of Britain sought to express HOW INCREDIBE ANGRGY it was about those men being mean to Manuel off Fawlty Towers. The forum's perma-outraged denizens are notorious as the inspiration of the Twat-o-Tron and accompanying …


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  1. David H
    Dead Vulture


    Am I the only one who initially thought that The Register's standards of grimmer and spilling had fillen down a lack mole?

    Mine's the jacket previously worn by Officer Crabtree.

  2. Ralph B
    IT Angle

    Damn Indeed

    > a bit pointless, rather like this story.

    Too right. The Reg really should be concentrating on the exciting developments of the Peaches Geldof story.

  3. Steven Jones

    Quite apart for the morality

    Quite apart from the morality or acceptability of their conduct, it is kind of heartwaming to see media-savvy loudmouths like that pair slip up quite so spectacularly in their judgement on what they can get away with.

  4. Mike Crawshaw


    But seriously. If I did what they did, I'd be speaking to policemen in the comfort of a nice pair of bracelets complete with connecting chain to make sure I didn't lose my wrists. It wasn't nice, it wasn't big or clever to leave abusive stuff about his grand-daughter on his voice mail, and it certainly wasn't amusing.

    I suggest, as a punishment, that they are both kept off the tv for the rest of forever. Because they're both shit, mainly, so that's a doubleplusgood bonus (I find Brand, in particular, about as amusing as a kick in the knackersack) - and perhaps they'll both starve from lack of exposure.

    (Though I can understand Brand WANTING to do the lady in question - I'd play Pirates with her anyday!)

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Worthy of Prime Ministerial attention it's not...

    ...but it was a thoroughly nasty thing to do anyway. I don't suppose I can get a discount on the TV license when the pair of them get fired, can I?

  6. Smallbrainfield
    Thumb Down

    *fails to give much of a hoot*

    This story has no merit whatsoever other than it is not about the credit crunch. I don't care much for Ross, and Brand is a buffoon. They don't deserve the shitstorm they're getting for this, though.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Brand Ross sex outrage


    I'll remember that forever, even if my brain is wiped with a mind rubber.

  8. Richard
    Thumb Down

    "Down with this sort of thing!"

    "Careful now!" - UK + Dog*

    *Just so the pitchfork wielding witch hunters don't come after me, let me make myself clear. I mean dogs of the canine variety, and am in no way making insulations that Manuel's granddaughter is a anything but a lovely, vaguely Gothic looking young lady.**

    **The skank.

  9. This post has been deleted by its author

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    are you bored by any chance?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Isn't that insulting?

    I mean Sachs has made it clear he's not bothered by it, but nobodies listening to him. Instead they listen to the newspapers exaggerating his nieces opinion of this! As though he's somehow not able to speak for himself, and their word is more accurate than his on matters relating to him!

    It's very presumptuous of them, to be offended on behalf of someone else. Patronising even.

  12. Jimmy Floyd
    Paris Hilton

    Rupert Murdoch isn't missing out

    At work we have a TV screen which is sometimes set to Sky News, as it was this lunchtime. I notice the Evil Empire is dedicating the sort of coverage to this which is normally reserved for major terrorist attacks, celebutard breast implants and (occasionally) serious news.

    A mite opportunist, one might say?

    Paris, because she may have slept with Russell Brand but no-one cares either (least of all Paris).

  13. Simon Hildreth

    In other news

    In other news, I rang my bank today and upset the automated call handler lady.

    Mines the one with the null point error...

  14. Anonymous Coward

    Let's Boycott the comments page in protest!


  15. Mark

    How would wossie like it?

    I thought about phoning up Wossie on his show and asking about whether his youngest is still going to be wearing the "Halloween Whore" outfit he was describing and whether he could get a photo up on the website of it.

    Or would he figure that's a bit off?

    One defendant said that it was no worse than some workplace shenanigans. Forgetting that Andrew Sachs wasn't part of the BBC Radio 2 team.

    I dare say Wossie isn't hurting too much, he's trousered millions from the BBC already.

  16. Andrew Kelly

    One thing that the interweb has taught me

    There are an awful lot of people out there who can't spell even the most basic words.

    My only comment on the Brand-Ross-Manuel saga is: how can Brand be described as a comedian?

  17. Anthony Allen

    I expect...

    ...Britain to collapse under the shear pressure of the masses not being able to vent their collective spleens. Some people need to grow up and get a life instead of echoing their thoughts to the comments section of a news site.

    (Anyway, it was funny)

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One Reg hack...

    It wasn't Lester then, he's obviously got a thing about celeb's?

  19. Carl


    "The actor, 78, said he would not be reporting the matter to police. "

    Just a hunch, but I don't think that even Ian Blair would be able to miss this glaringly obvious evidence...

  20. Tim Spence

    First-time BBC commenter

    This story (non-story) caused me to write my first ever piece of correspondence to the BBC. And I don't even write stuff at work, for money, so the BBC has a lot to answer for.

    It was a complaint, not about Brand and Ross, but at the BBC for pandering to pitchfork-wielding Daily Mail reading Britain. Honestly, I wish the corporation had some balls and would act a bit more like Channel 4 possibly would in this situation, and issue a statement simply saying "Fuck off".

    I didn't hear the actual show, but from what I have heard in the meeja, it's some people with humour-bypasses who are likely over the age of 60 fuelling the fire. They do like a good moan over a steaming storm in a teacup, don't they.

    As a licence-fee paying person, I also resent the assumption and accusation that I have been offended over this. Mark Thompson: "This gross lapse of taste by the performers and the production team has angered licence payers".

    Mark, I've got news for you; I really don't give a fuck, and actually, neither do most of the licence-fee paying public.

  21. N Silver badge

    Indeed, who gives a f**k

    My comment on the BBC vent-your-spleen-politely-o-tron for the benefit of El Reg readers who cant be arsed to sift through more digital venom than an "I hate Vista" forum:

    Russell Brand & Jonathan Ross are both a refreshing breath of fresh air to a channel fully prepared to ram its own particular brand of political correctness down our throats.

    If I ran an independent TV channel, Id be drafting their contract right now & probably for a lot more money.

    recommended by 8 so far, so probably a record high for me

  22. Andy H

    Sack him

    Chris, how dear you swear in an article on this esteemed and family friendly website. Off to the moderatrix with you, or maybe even the erstwhile Ms Baille here

    and here

    Apologies to all for having to link to the Daily mail and I have to agree who gives a fuck, apart from outraged DM readers (who don't count anyway)

  23. Anonymous Coward

    Pointless story?

    I'll get *your* coat, shall I?

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    It's all a set up

    Look through the horse manure folks, guess who's Georgina Baillie's PR agent is - yes that's right -Max Clifford. In my opinion this is a load of press manipulation to further her career. Money can't buy this sort of publicity and the people who should be being censured are the parasites trying to manipulate the situation for their own personal gain out of my licence fee.

    Don't be sheep folks

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Russell Brand is a talentless tit

    Wait, am I reading this right? Some of you actually think Russell Brand is refreshing? That guy is a talentless cock. I don't agree with the outrage, but I do think the idiot should get off our TV.

    Even Paris Hilton has more intelligent that the idiot.

  26. Bassey


    I think it would be quite funny if their service provider suspended their telephone service - much like they would for any of us who made a series of abusive calls. Not going to happen, obviously, but it would be amusing to see the Beeb try to justify it's phone-centric output as "Entertainment" once the phone part is taken away. It would certainly put an end to that fecking "Children in need" shite and, for that alone, I would have to thank the talentless twosome.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle


    How strange that after the programme in question was broadcast Radio 2 only had a couple of complaints about the swearing.

    But now, since the "story" broke, there's over 20,000 complaints. I would guess 99% of which are from people who didn't even listen to the programme in the first place.

    All these people with nothing better to do than jump on the complaining band-wagon.

    The British love a good moan - even if they don't know what they're moaning about.

  28. Leigh Smith


    What bothers me is that the biggest news story in the country for the last 3 days is that two Radio DJs upset an old man. What the hell?

    This has obviously been stirred up the commercial press to take a swipe at the BBC. Until the likes of ITV, SKY and the tabloids decided this was going to be the world's most important development the BBC had all of two complaints. Once the story broke Sach's received and accepted an apology. Naturally the press successfully stirred up outrage amongst the Daily Mail readers of the world and on seeing a bandwagon rolling on by the politicians couldn't help but throw themselves at it. Brown and Cameron must have been falling over each other to jump on it first.

    Naturally of course it was revealed today by the some of those responsible for starting this shit storm that no lies where told in those answerphone messages. I found it very Interesting how ITN and Sky News initially described her as a dancer and singer and not as a kinky Satan fetish stripper. I'm sure Sach's is already fully aware that he has a depraved tart as a Granddaughter so I doubt it was protect his sensibilities. No it was just to paint the BBC in the worst possible light . Rupert Murdoch must have creamed his pants when he got wind of this news story.

    If this had been on a local commercial radio station nobody would have have cared or noticed. If Sach's hadn't been in Farty Towels nobody would have cared either.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What really gets me

    is that fat f---ing theiving incompetent lying sack of s--- Gordon "Fascist overlord" Brown and equaly s--- filled w----r David "Facist overlord in waiting" Cameron voicing opinions on it, don't you two t---s have anything better to do? Like wrecking another economy, trashing more jobs or making more perfectly innocent things illegal?

    Bunch of f---ing monkeys spunks, but as I said yesterday, the people get the government they deserve.

  30. TimM


    Yes it's on face value OTT, but on the other hand it is a reflection of the true feeling against Ross (in the main).

    This has been an opportunity to voice opinions on how ludicrously highly paid he is and not worth a penny of it.

    More than that though is it is our money paying for him.

    What I never have understood though is why the Beeb backs him, pays his insane salary, and yet struggles so much that they have to flog the iconic BBC TV centre!

    Sack Ross and a lot of money becomes available to sort the Beeb out.

    So yes, it may be OTT, but I like most people don't care, we just want Ross booted out. Let him try and command that kind of salary on a commercial network, not at the taxpayers expense (and yes before you start, it is a tax, not a stupid "licence" fee).

    Brand is a moron who's comedy appeals to juveniles, and fair enough in a way. Let him get his knuckles wrapped and move on. Ross on the other hand is supposed to be the Beeb's top presenter.

  31. blackworx
    Paris Hilton

    Oh yeah...

    Sachs' niece has "cut short" her European tour doing whichever non-celebrated performing activity it is she's been up to thus far, in order to come back to Britain and "deal with the situation".

    "cut short" = gaily abandoned

    "deal with the situation" = get as much free publicity as humanly possible with a view to obtaining (at the very least) a substantial celebrity status-linked salary hike.

    Then again, perhaps I am being a touch over-cynical.

  32. Rat

    As far as I can see...

    ...the only real value to this whole thing is that it might finally expel that tedious twat Brand from our screens. I don't have any real beef with Ross.

  33. Tim Brown
    Paris Hilton

    that's showbiz!

    Bad luck on the old bloke, as if getting repeatedly hit on the head with a spoon by John Cleese wasn't enough humiliation for one lifetime.

    However the granddaughter is doing alright out of this. As they say, there's no such thing as bad publicity in showbiz... and I hear she has no retained that pillar of the community, Max Clifford as her PR agent. Watch out Abi Titmuss is all I can say!

    Paris, cos she knows all about showbiz and scandals!

  34. Ash

    daily mail hysteria

    It was a bad joke, end of story. The fucking Daily Heil inciting pitchfork wielding sheepmobs are pretty scary, its a shame people can't think and judge for themselves and within proportion.

  35. Lloyd
    Thumb Up

    Well I give a fuck

    If only because I want to ostracise Brand so he fucks off to the States and spends the rest of his life playing a twatty British rock star in shit teen comedies (to be fair Forgetting Sarah Marshall was actually quite good).

  36. Anonymous Coward


    What I found far more offensive was flicking over to channel 4 last night to witness 'embarrassing teenage illnesses', and the thrushy penis followed by loose labia brought with it. It put me off kebabs for life.

    When will the Daily Mail come to address these issues and ensure its readership can enjoy a bland and unoffensive schedule of costume dramas??

    Mines the one with the antifungal cream in the pocket.

  37. Alastair

    There's no doubt in my mind...

    That the vast majority of people complaining did not hear it, will not hear it, and are outraged because of a lack of more interesting things to do in their life.

    And punish Ross and Brand? Come on. Brand has already starred in a couple of Hollywood films, and has a load more in the pipeline- if anything this will raise his profile. Ross can just get another gold-plated contract at ITV or Sky or something. In other news, the world will continue to turn this week, as...

  38. Patrick

    Stop using licence fee for funding entertainment

    Whilst I quite enjoy Ross, the way they've behaved here is pretty pathetic. I certainly find it offensive.

    It makes me wonder why we are paying £140/year in licence fees to fund "entertainment" on radio/tv? We've got hundreds of entertain radio/tv channels now - with thousands to come in the future via the internet.

    Surely the private sector's perfectly capable of doing this without resorting to public funding?

    They should either get rid of the licence or just have it for public interest programmes that won't be produced by the private sector.

    Alternatively levy UK broadcasters to fund public interest programmes. I wouldn't support government funding as that's too susceptible to political influence.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Cheap PR stunt... promote the career of a Dita von Teese wannabe.

    Cynical, me?

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Well hopefully some have learnt

    Push the boundaries to the sewer, as seems to be BBC comedy's current plan, and you might just fall into the excrement

  41. Matt Kimber


    I note with some despair that not only have we gone completely over-the-top on a celebrity-centred non-story while there's actual, real news going on in the world (complete with token weighing in by the politicos!), but that the BBC have even gone ahead and thrown in their favourite old tat of calling it a "perfect storm", two words vying for what has to be possibly the most over-used journalistic phrase of 2008.

  42. Sceptical Bastard

    Damn indeed!

    I just *knew* El Reg would succumb to this story. But well done for holding out so long :)

    Anyway, I added my sixpen'th to the Beeb's complaints page (not, I hasten to add, to the Twat-O-Tron itself).

    Why? Is it because dear old Grandad Sachs is a nash'nul trezz? Nope. Is it because a fair young maid was defiled and betrayed by a bounder? Nope. Is it because there is an issue of great national importance here? Nope. Is it because I'm a Mail reader? Good god no!

    It is because I'd do anything within reason to wipe the smug self-satisfied grins off the fatuous faces of those two talentless unfunny puerile pricks.

    Never mind Andrew Sachs, never mind his comely grand-daughter (I mean, you *would*, wouldn't you?), never mind the lack of judgement by the producers - the fact remains that Brand and Ross are stomach-churning wankstains who deserve a timely and massive cut in their payslips, if not actually burning at the stake.

    Other people have put these two fuckers in the pillory so I'm jumping on the bandwagon to hurl rotten fruit at them (and let that fruit be smeared with dog turd).

    Phew! Thanks for sharing. Nurse!

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    May I suggest the sex offenders register

    Aren't we all enlightened and radical? Yeah, or maybe not. I would say you're all about as radical as the Rik character out the Young Ones.

    Making abusive phone calls containing sexual innuendo would get any non-celeb straight on the sex offenders register. Whether you thought it funny or beyond the pale is irrelevant. The pair should be duly taken down.

  44. Steve

    I bought Jonathan Ross's dog

    It died

  45. Jeff Rowse Silver badge

    And in other news..?

    Wonder what Gordon and fiends are sneaking out while the idiots in the mass media go overboard on a complete non-issue... New databases? More lost CDs/DVDs/Laptops?

    So Wossy and Brand played silly beggars - big fracking deal. Anyone else find it amusing how long it took for "people" to notice what thye'd done? What was it, nearly TWO WHOLE WEEKS(!) before The Masses noticed they'd been a little bit rude...

    I always thought "freedom of speech" could be interpreted as the right to be insulted by, or to insult, anybody but obviously I was wrong. Can anyone recommend a good lawyer so I can sue all those mean and nasty people who ever called me a nasty name?

    Last one out, please turn off the lights.

  46. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    I'll just say that

    I have opinions on this but I am staying well out of it except to say, I bet you don't really care about any aspect of this as much as you think you do, and nor does anyone else.

    I'll be glad when it's over, one way or another, it's just depressing.

  47. Juillen
    Thumb Down

    @Tim Spence et. al.

    Course you don't care. It's not happened to you, right? Therefore, it's ok. You're not offended. No problem.

    Mr. Sachs isn't calling in the cops, so good on him, I say. Just shows he's actually a worthwhile chap who has a lot of backbone (who knows Ross and Brand are going to get a kicking anyway), and just wants to get on with life, without all the fuss.

    Really, Ross & Brand were just bullying. Same thing you see on school playground the world over. None of the kids give a damn about the one being bullied there either; because it's not them, it's ok.

    Was I arsed to write a letter of condemnation to the beeb? No. Do I think Ross and Brand need a kicking for being bullies, and breaking the BBCs own rules of conduct? Damn straight. So does the person who signed off on it.

  48. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Shirley this incident falls within Ofcom's definition of a nuisance phone call? And isn't the standard punishment for such trangression disconnection? If so I think they should cut off all the Beeb's phone lines, especially the voting lines for shows like Strictly Come Dancing.

    Seriously it matters not whether listeners were offended, there's always the off button and even Daily Mail readers can find that. Standard in broadcasting can be controlled by the listener, if enough

    If we're talking nuisance phone calls what does matter however is whether the recipient of the phone calls was offended. And of course nuisance phone calls can cross the line into criminal offence. Could be interesting if Sachs complains to DCI Knacker.

  49. Red Bren
    Thumb Down

    BBC iFlayer

    This isn't the first time a wave of moral outrage has swept through a vocal minority of the population that never actually witnessed the event that provoked their vitriol.

    The BBC needs to review its complaints procedure and put a time-limit on complaint submissions. Something like 8 days after the original broadcast (to allow for iPlayer availability) or the appearance of a shock-horror story in the gutter press, whichever happens sooner.

    That way, only people who actually tuned in to the broadcast and were genuinely offended can complain and not the daily-hate-mail reading morons who would have us watching nothing but endless repeats of Dad's Army.

  50. Anonymous Coward

    aah finally..

    The UK is standing up for the abuse of Satanic goths..

    It's heart-warming to see, after the abuse we've had over ..

    oh wait..

    /the one with the !Wumpscut! logo ...

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Tim Spence

    "It was a complaint, not about Brand and Ross, but at the BBC for pandering to pitchfork-wielding Daily Mail reading Britain"

    Ditto - total over reaction - especially getting to PM's question, great way to jump on the band-wagon to divert real issues though.

    I did listen to it ( it's on youtube ), maybe a little juvenile, but hardly grossly offensive - Russel Brand DID fuck his daughter.

    ( And I thought Russel Brand's Ponderland was ace ).

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    What I want to know

    Is whether Russell Brand has fucked Paris Hilton?

  53. David Arno

    Who's Ross?

    When did this happen then? First time I've heard about it.

  54. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    No punishment great enough

    for any man who refers to his cock as his 'winky'.

    But the truly funny bit was seeing the people who had commented on this national outrage on completely unrelated forums.

  55. david

    Guess what...'ve all gone rushing over to SYB and broke it...

  56. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Brand has already had his punishment

    Looking at the pictures of said pseudoactress wannabee which is the center of the scandal, Brand quite clearly has already had his punishment. In fact he has probably had an extra dose of it. He probably hates certain portions of his anatomy now and this is a extenuating circumstance for his behaviour.

    This leaves Ross, and frankly, his removal off the airwaves is nothing but a reason to celebrate.

  57. Anonymous Coward

    One question...

    who the f**k is this brand guy? Never heard of him before, I suspect it has something to do with me leaving my TV permanently turned off, the blank screen is far more entertaining than any of the crap the bbc pumps out.

  58. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @May I suggest the sex offenders register

    Tells you alot about the value of that particular register doesn't it.

  59. Gordon Matson
    Thumb Down

    it actually was very funny

    ok, it went a bit far and now they've apologised. If you want to see how OTT it really is, head over to the bbc news page where there are seven or so articles about the incident and the report detailing thescores of people that have died in an earthquake in Pakistan is buried in the "other news" section.

    is a little perspective too much to ask?

  60. Matt Bradley


    Have you actually HEARD the broadcast? Actually Ross and Brand were being extremely complimentary to Sachs. but then Ross got carried away in a rather tasteless joke, and said something he shouldn't

    In fact, you can hear it in their voices that they knew they had gone too far.

    To characterise this as" bullying" seems a bit odd. I don't think that you've heard the broadcast. Was that the word they used in the Daily Mail?

  61. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    She slept with Russell Brand

    Fact is shes admitted she had a "relationship" with Brand. Anyone stupid enough to do that is asking for anything they get, I mean come on. Its the same as a footballer sleeping with a page 3 model and then being stunned when she writes a "kiss and tell" story for the Daily Star.

    Why on earth did it make into the commons?? Don't they have other things to be worrying about, such as the economy, kids shooting each other and other small matters like that? Hasn't this all gotten a tad out of hand??

    You'd think they'd exhumed Princess Dianas body and had woopee with it the way some folk are going on about it.

    I've got 3 words for ya... GET A GRIP.

  62. Lloyd

    Brand has already starred in a couple of Hollywood films

    "Brand has already starred in a couple of Hollywood films, and has a load more in the pipeline- if anything this will raise his profile"

    Bahhahahahaha, "starred in" ????? Surely you mean appeared in? He got no billing in either Penelope (bombed) or Forgetting Sarah Marshall (enjoyable even with him in it). As for the 2 forthcoming films, in one he's playing the same character as Forgetting Sarah Marshall (not that anyone would typecast him as a vain, egotisitical prick of a rock star wannabe) and the other he'll be blown out of the water by the rest of the cast (but getting superb actors to act in contemporary version of the Tempest and changing Prospero to a female just sounds awful).

  63. Anonymous Hero

    @Red Bren

    "This isn't the first time a wave of moral outrage has swept through a vocal minority of the population that never actually witnessed the event that provoked their vitriol."

    Reminds me of the Stallman/Freetard crowd that threw their toys out the pram when the beeb beta'd iplayer. They must all read the same paper.

    Mine's the one with the obfuscator, dongles and activation keys in the pockets.

  64. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Good. Ish.

    Who cares about the pitchfork-wielding illiterates, surely anything that pillories that useless tit Brand has to be a good thing, tedious gobshite that he is.

    Though the innumerable "Outraged of Suburbia" being outraged isn't a pretty sight.

    Paris, because I haven't a clue which icon to use and neither has she.

  65. Brian
    Thumb Up

    I commented

    I signed up to the BBC to comment on this story simply because I hate the pair of talentless fops - why should twats like that trouser multi-million pound (Ross) or even multi-hundreds of thousands of pounds in salary for their puerile and tasteless attempts at humour?

    Mind you, when I pointed out on the economics blog that Mandelson's Russian chum is likely to get a favourable restructuring agreement on his 5.4 billion quid loan from HBOS, it was removed as 'potentially defamatory'.


  66. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hang on ...

    I found the comments rude, obnoxious and unnecessary. If I had heard this on commercial radio I wouldn't give a hoot, would expect OFCOM to prosecute the presenter and radio station for breaking the law and move on.

    That I have to pay a tax for this chav bilge is too much however.

  67. blackworx

    Multiple choice time

    This article is not pointless because it is the first one on the subject which...

    A) Has not forced a picture of Russell "I'm a lovely chap whose libel suit the Moderatrix is very wise to avert and not a very silly man at all" Brand into my eyes, my eyes, my beautiful eyes.

    B) Does not make me want to stab myself repeatedly in the head with a fork.

    C) Has made me laugh

    D) All of the above

  68. The Fuzzy Wotnot
    Dead Vulture


    For someone so outraged, Miss Ballie seems to be doing rather well out of all this? Top of all search engines, selling story to the papers, pictures of her in her pants all over the gutter press.

  69. Anonymous John
    IT Angle

    Never mind

    The US election will replace it next week.


  70. Alex C


    I listened to that pod cast - it's usually pretty funny, and this was no exception, though fairly tacky. I assumed at the end that they had recorded his voicemail and were playing spoofs.

    Jonathan Ross was definitely the tackier of the two, both have apologised (and did so frequently during the show). Andrew Sachs later accepted - presumably because he already knew what she's about, and just wants a quiet life. So far, so what?

    Tarantara - Enter the Daily Mail (stage right) roundly dissing the pair of them as a evil pariahs, fair enough, and using the article as an excuse to show off as many pics as they could fit on the page of a 23 year old in full battle-webbing. A masterful stroke as it lets the curtain-twitchers rear in moral indignation whilst slavering all over the photos. (Which are great if you go in for over made-up slightly plump strumpets, by the way).

    Net result - fine them both £humungous for breaching the broadcasting guidelines to teach them not to do it again, and let them get on with it, tell the politicians to mind their own business - this couldn't have anything less to do with politics if it tried, and believe exactly the same of Ross, Brand and the Daily mail as you already did.

  71. Nick


    They're not the BBC's Messiah's - THEY'RE VERY NAUGHTY BOYS!!!

  72. Bill Cumming
    Thumb Up

    Erm... I Blame Sachs..

    This was a *RECORDED* show. Andrew had time to submit a complaint to the BBC and stop it being broadcast. But he didn't, his fault.


    Latest news is Brand has quit the BBC and is off to the US.

    On second thoughts... Good work Sachs :D:D

  73. Pete

    The only explanation left...

    ... this species is amusing itself to death.

  74. MarkMac

    Funny - not

    I'm sure all the people claiming it was hilarious would be similarly rolling with laughter if it had been their grannie receiving the call, and their sister who was the subject of Brand's delightful advances. After all its always amusing hearing people brag about their conquests, especially when they claim to have shagged your family.

    On second thoughts, they probably /would/ think it was funny - but then they all have a mental age of 12 don't they?

    As for the BBC website, I'm unsurprised it collapsed. If I'd phoned a client's answering machine and made similar comments about his or her family I'd have been fired on the spot, and I strongly suspect most normal rational adults take the same view.

  75. JimC

    > Never witnessed (@Red Bren etc)

    Yeah, but the major problem with this particular incident isn't that they broadcast it: anyone with the requisite sense of "humour" to listen to that show probably wouldn't be offended.

    The major problem is that the pair of ****wits did it in the first place.

    Its also a significant problem that the idiot manager who approved it didn't have the sense to cut the thing either, which is a serious misjudgement.

    But its all about acceptable behaviour, not about offending that audience. An audience of convicted paedophiles problem wouldn't be offended by a show of the kind of thing that got them their convictions, but it still wouldn't be right to put that show on!

  76. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Dear God...

    I'm stunned at the outrage this has caused, and the sheer amount of band-wagon jumping that's subsequently happened.

    Let's be clear, it took over a WEEK for the Mail to run the story after it was broadcast, and Sachs was asked if he was ok for it to be broadcast or not. I listened to the show (podcast form) as I normally do and thought it was a bit OTT but rather amusing. As for "crank call", he was expecting a call from them to do an interview - so he invited the calls, just not the content (and who ever does?).

    The only thing worth complaining about is the use of the word "f*ck" - and IIRC there is a disclaimer at the start of the show/podcast "warning, the following broadcast may contain strong language".

    And now Brand has resigned. All because Ross swore (allowed) and said Brand had been involved in carnal relations (if that's the term) with Sachs' granddaughter, truthfully it seems, as she has now come out and accepted (despite at first denying).

    What's the world coming to?

  77. The Mighty Spang

    i fink

    thank anybody who pronounces "think" as "fink" shouldn't be allowed anywhere near a microphone.

  78. Pierre

    The real question...

    Apparently, Sachs contacted the producer before the broadcast and was told that the answerphone messages wouldn't be broadcast. Then the broadcast was approved by the very same person (Philps). Though the prank was lame, the prankster are actually paid big money to do exactly that, because it amuses the brainless masses. This time the brainless masses were bamboozled into finding it offensive, but he fact is, the two mercenary buffoon did exactly what they are (over)paid to do. The slimy producer should be the one taking the heat here.

    That's how the mass media work... and that's how corrupt politicians can get away with anything while pitchfork mobs build cardboard idols only to burn them a couple month later. Keeps them busy I guess.

  79. Dean Ayers
    Thumb Down


    No ones doubting it should have been edited, but the facts are simple...

    1) It was an interview set up with both parts and manuel didnt pick up the phone, it dont condone what was said but its not like they were randomly ringing care homes and insulting people.

    2) His grandaughter is part of the girl group " The Satanic Sluts" and does glamor modeling, how can he, or she be upset with somthing as trivial as this given her day job(s)?

    3) Brand is a comedian, hes said and done far worse and at the time of the show going out 2 people complained, since the daily mail had a slow news day/week and heard about the interview 2nd hand 20.000 have so far, and its a very safe bet most of those wont have even tuned in to his show, or maybe even the 5min soundbyte

    The thing that really gets me is, a lot of people dont understand him, or get his comedy and this has helped thing mess snowball in to what it has and it wouldnt suprise me if he ended up geting the sack, One of the very few services/shows I use on the bbc is going to be taken away

    So can I stop paying my Tv licence? oh wait no I cant, So efectivly im losing out.

    I dont like the proms, I dont like opera or eastenders, but you know what? If I dont like it, I turn off, The mindless sheep and the moronic PC brigade should do the same and report and worry about real news.

  80. Fred Dibnah

    @Tim Spence

    So, Tim, you resent other people assuming you've been offended. Well, as a fellow licence fee payer, I resent *you* assuming that *I* don't give a fuck.

  81. FreeTard
    Paris Hilton

    @Sarah Bee

    Oh go On Miss Bee, speak yer mind. Everyone else does on El Reg.

    Personally I think Brand's a twat, but I do like Ross. He is so un-pc that I just fucking love him.

    This is why I also love El Reg, you know, I LOL's when I found out it was "moderated".

  82. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Russell Brand, never heard of him,

    although he does sound like a company that makes cheap toasters. Jonny Ross, isn't he the one with the lisp or other such speach impediment that makes him sound as though he is a nine year old girl? Now he is behaving like a nine year old girl and leaving people nasty phone messages. Oh well, I suppose that the TV tax is so low that the BBC cannot afford real men.

    The icon reminds me of wankers.

  83. Anonymous Coward

    Anybody else notice...

    That within 24 hours of the said "incident" only 2 complaints had been received, and that it took a "shock horror surely this kinda thing is illegal because it encourages paedophiles/terrorists/other" story in the Fail on Sunday for people to notice... and nearly a full week after that to get 3000 complaints.

    So, if it's ok to complain a week after something happened that you then most likely haven't actually heard, I would hereby like to express my disgust at the way Mr D Frost treated someone on That Was The Week That Was.

    /I'll leave my coat for Mr Brand, as it has a ticket for a foot trip to Yemen in the pocket.

  84. Anonymous Coward

    in that case

    I'll rest my brane and not comment!


  85. Sceptical Bastard

    @ Sarah

    You're partly right, Sarah - I don't care much either way about Russell Brand (although I'm relieved that there'll be a bit less of him on radio and TV now).

    However, my longstanding dislike of Ross is as strong as my comment suggests. After this furore I look forward to seeing a lot less of the egregious overpaid smug git on TV.

    Yes, the story has been relentlessly hyped and yes, the media coverage has been febrile. But if Ross goes, it will have been worth it.

    Perhaps one reason why this seemingly trivial story has struck such a chord with the middle-aged middle class is that both "comedians" are paid huge amounts of money while lesser mortals face crumbling pensions, rocketing fuel bills and the spectre of unemployment. Or perhaps harrumphing to the Beeb is displacement activity, a distraction from the gloom of the real world.

  86. James Pickett


    "They don't deserve the shitstorm they're getting for this"

    Oh yes they do. I rather hope they get fired and move to Sky, where the Sun (prop. The Dirty Digger) will have to report their arrival in glowing terms and Rebekah (sic) Wade will again dodge the microphones.

  87. RogueElement
    Thumb Down

    on a scale of 1-10, I award the following points:

    Respect for Andrew Sachs 10

    cuteness of innocent victim 7

    spelling 5

    reason for putting this lame ass story in ElReg 0

    comedic value of Jonathan Ross 0

    comedic value of Russell Brand -50

    Good riddance you fucks.

  88. Anonymous Coward

    Don't change the bbc

    @Stop using licence fee for funding entertainment

    Don't you fucking dare, if we take away the BBC, good bad and indifferent though it is, the independent programs will only get worse, no competition from the BBC will mean that TV will be a far shittier thing.

    Go and watch broadcast television in the USA for a really crap experience, if you can keep up with the story when the breaks for ads happen every 5 minutes.

    What was the purpose of this stupid story? to get Cameron and his money grabbing cronies out of the Greek boat story shit.

  89. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down


    ies damn lies and stistics!... its obvious that pregnant children are going to put us all in death camps because they're rining britain... time to act: go round their houses with a pair of pliers and a can of petrol... great britain is oing to the dogs!!!

  90. Someone

    Re: I'll just say that

    Sarah Bee wrote, “I'll be glad when it's over, one way or another, it's just depressing.”

    I thought for one moment that that was a quote from Mr Sachs himself. All that remains is to shut up Ms Baillie. Georgina, you’ve gone from relative obscurity to being in headline stories across the news media. As other’s have commented, use that fact, progress your career. Don’t come out with any more of that faux indignation, revelling in the suffering of Ross and Brand. It won’t endear you to us.

  91. David Simpson

    lets be honest

    the actress/lady of loose morals has confirmed Brand wasn't lying so what exactly is the problem, oh yes Rupert wants the beeb to sack it's stars so he can put them on sky

  92. Gareth Jones Silver badge

    Thank you!

    "I would say you're all about as radical as the Rik character out the Young Ones."

    Thank you. I've been thinking that about Woss for years. I have actually heard him say things like "I don't know how we get away with it" and "I'm amazed they haven't sacked us yet." Which is exactly like listening to Wik telling everybody how "wadical" he was. It's also like listening to Steve Wright back in the eighties, and I'm told that f*ckwit is still at it. So apart from anything else it would be a delicious irony if the twat did get the sack. And can they sack Wright as well just on the grounds that he's a twat too?

    Woss made it on the back of scripts written for him by his brother, then dumped his brother and the Twistwams at the BBC can't actually tell that it's Paul that's got all the talent in the family (although, admittedly, it's still not that much). Anybody who feels they need to keep telling people they are funny can't be funny.

  93. Chris
    Thumb Up

    It's all good

    I have always disliked Brand + Ross, really I couldn't give a sh*t about their careers. If the whole thing truly was manipulated by Clifford as some tin-foil hat wearers here seem to think, then I commend the man.

  94. Warhelmet

    La-La Land

    As I sit in my motorised reclining armchair (with built-in vibrating massage action) and contemplate retiring to bed via my stannah stairlift and saluting the portraits of Margaret Thatcher and David English on the way...

    A little suck of oxygen via my mask and...

    Go Britain! Go Media! Go Public! Yes, let's see you beat yourself into a frothy masturbatory frenzy over something so incredibly trivial that on the radar front - lower than sea-skimming.

    So, the misbehaviours of two wankers is more important than who gets to press the button to start WWIII? Ditto, like, jobs down the toilet.

    Bah. This is the death-knell of democracy. This is the crack at the end of the whip. Evil forces are at work. The mind rays projected from orbit are shrinking people's brains. We will all end up reading Heat and believing and caring out the celeb shite they peddle.

  95. Schultz Silver badge
    Dead Vulture

    Useless comments

    about a pointless story on people I have never heard of.

    So here is my contribution: !!!

  96. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    sad days, the bbc yet again cowers in the corner afraid of pressure put upon it by hypocrits and idiots. I don't like these t--ts, but then I don't like little britain, or Eastenders, or Merlin or any of that trite c--p but I do like Have I Got News For You (well I used to, that's a bit junk now days) and Mock the Week (to be honest the only two things on TV worth watching imo) and I can see far more that these hypocritical c---- would dislike in those two phenomenal shows then those two wet media whoring wankers could ever come up with.

    What a worthless institution it has become. I wonder how long till those two shows get axed for being a bit too cutting.

  97. stolbart

    How about some quality control

    ok so a pair of purile, overpaid broadcasters make some lame jokes about a satanic stripper whos grandad used to get hit with a spoon and say ...k for a living, features on newsnight before the humaitarian crisis in the democratic republic of the congo.

    If you actually wasted your time listening to the broadcast you will know there is very little to be offended by and even less to laugh at. But what is offensive is how easily a non-story has taken grip of the nation...blah blah...we dont all read the daily mail, most of us dont give a crap, dont censor our media its bad enough already without having less to choose from.

    If ive ever felt that my tax (err license fee) has been misspent its that i tune in too watch a politics show and i get a debate about whether Russel Brand and Jonathan Ross are funny or not....f##k you and your goth stripper grandaughters.

    If it wasn't for torrents I wouldnt get to watch good tv and even then it gets cancelled half way through the second season.


  98. Anonymous Coward

    @ Bill Cumming

    Hey now, no shuffling talentless vapid celebritards from your shores to ours. That's just unfai..... Oh wait you all just got Paris Hilton.


    Fine, fine then. But were even now.

  99. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Tim Spence

    So you actually know most of the lincence payers do you?

    Your comment is as stupid as the DG's - no probably more stupid.

    An to the Assh'le who implied that people over sixty don't have a sense of humour - just come round here and let me insert my sense of humour where it hurts.

  100. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @It's all set up

    "Georgina Baillie's PR agent is - yes that's right -Max Clifford"

    What's the betting she didn't have press agent until this story broke. Max Clifford has just seen the opportunity to make another fast buck.

  101. Clint Sharp
    Paris Hilton

    @ What Gets Me 16:15

    AC, stop for a second and think about it.

    If we can make sure that the BBC continues to employ talentless wankers like Brand (if there was ever someone who deserved a good twatdangling more...) and give them free reign to insult, denigrate and generally offend DM readers then there's a chance that we can take up all of Gordon Bean's time, thereby stopping him from f*cking the country up even further.

    The BBC, public service broadcasting at its very best.

    Paris, because she's got a bit of a history with telephones....

  102. Chris G Silver badge

    Much ado about nothing

    As it is above, so it is here below!

  103. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    There was a happy ending

    My money is no longer wasted on the talent-free Brand and Saturday nights *should* be safe again on R2. Now just George Lamb to go from 6Music. C'mon, George, that phone won't dial itself!

  104. Mr Larrington

    I have long held it to be gospel...

    ...that Jonathan Ross should be made illegal and that Russell Brand is the Anti-Christ. It's nice to have it confirmed. The real broadcasting story of the past few weeks, though, is why those donkey-felching cockwombles at Channel 5 replaced the promised highlights of the Bathurst 1000 with coverage of blokes in stupid trousers playing rounders.

  105. TeeCee Gold badge

    From the article:

    "Which in itself is a bit pointless, rather like this story."

    Immediately beneath that:


    How sad are we? It's all very well to take the piss out of the Daily Heil and the Beeb for making so much fuss about this, but there's an old saying about pots and kettles that applies here.

    (Sad, because I am by being here.)

  106. Tim Spence

    RE: Anonymous Twat @ 00:10

    First things first, it's licence, not lincence.

    Secondly, after doing my own rough poll of people at work and observing comments online, it's obvious that half the people don't give a fuck, and half the people didn't actually hear it but assume from what they've been told that it's an outrage.

    Thirdly, I think I was the asshole who suggested that over 60s don't have senses of humour. So feel free to come round and insert your wrinkly sense of humour where it hurts. If you think you can still get your sense of humour up nowadays.

    PS. Stop being an anonymous coward and post under your real name.

  107. Ron Eve

    @I have long held it to be gospel.

    Mr Larrington: "donkey-felching cockwombles"

    You owe me new keyboard and screen. I intend to use that expression immediately...


  108. Steven Williams

    I thought it was quite funy actually.

    While I do think they stepped ove rhte line. I thought it was quite funny and typical of the RB and JR type of presenting.

    Is this worth all the press. No. Should they be repremanded. Yes. Should anyone loose there jobs over it. Yes but not the presenters. It was pre-recorded and edited.

    the fact that the calls were made was wrong. The fact that it was broadcat is not the presenters fault. There are 2 different issues.

  109. Steve

    I R speke ma branes

    Let's not be hasty

    Ross = baby

    Brand = bathwater (wierdly, I think of Russell Brand whenever I have to clean out all the hair'n'pubes from my plughole; you know, when you pull out about 6 inches of the stuff - yum!)

  110. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    But you've got to admit guys, this grand daughter of Manuel isn't a bit half tasty. I wouldn't say no.

  111. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Tim Spence

    PS. Stop being an anonymous coward and post under your real name.

    But please sir, RotaCyclic is my real name

    Whether AC or not AC, it's not a real name anyway.

    Personally being an ex-electronics engineer, I prefer a bit of DC.

  112. Anthony

    Other than the total ...

    ... ridiculousness of this shitstorm over nothing, I find it quite ironic that people complaining about bullying and "unfunniness" are quite happy to stroll right in with a bit of "humour" about a speech disability. Isn't there a law about that kind of thing?

    The second ironic part? Nobody seems to mention that "Manuel" himself is really only known for acting in a role that, these days, would be considered a racist stereotype.

    Frankly I'm not offended by any of the above, but I guess it just proves the old adage "when BA jets land, you can still hear whining after the engines have been switched off".

  113. Andy G

    @ Someone


    All that remains is to shut up Ms Baillie.


    ZIP, LOB

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh !

  114. VulcanV5

    Biggest pair of cretins ever

    I'm not going to waste time commenting here but I can't let this opportunity pass without saying that the two of them are the biggest, smuggest, talentless, brainless, charmless pair of self-serving, self-promoting brain-dead wastes-of-space I've ever heard of.

    And that's just the two who made the initial complaint.

  115. Sceptical Bastard

    A moniker too far

    I just heard this affair described as 'Manuelgate' on Radio 4. FFS! :)

  116. Tony Rogers
    Thumb Down

    Brand & Ross

    A pair of overpaid, unfunny retards.

    They need all that comes their way, hopefully on some unheard of commercial radio.

    They make "Entertainment" ? sound like bad idea.

    To hell with them

  117. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @It's all set up

    Clifford employs people who simply troll the news for likely customers.

    "Hello, Miss Voluptua? Have you got a PR consultant? No? Would you like one?"

    Of course the game with most press agents is that they don't charge you a penny for their services. They charge the press. That way you get PR and hopefully make some money out of extra sales/appearance fees etc. depending on your line of business and the press agent makes a fortune out of selling you to the papers.

  118. Anonymous Coward


    ..................... *yawn*.........................................



    nope! its pointless making a comment!....

    huh! What? I just did!? - Bugger!

    *\. Getting my coat and leaving.

  119. Why

    Where's Bill Grundy Now?

    I'm told that these broadcasters have received xxxx amounts of pounds of public service broadcast money for their part in leaving offensive messages on a National treasure's ansaphone machine, doesn't that seem slightly opposed to their commitment to being hilarious, good taste, good value and not a blue word to be uttered, comedians?

    No the more the merrier

    Well tell us more then?

    I fuckin' spent din't I?

    Good Lord, on what

    Unfashionable black seditionaries bondage gear. Cos I was a punk and still am, right kids? CHAOS!

    What about you behind.

    You dirty dirty ole man

    No, no I said you behind.

    Ah. Well I'm just heartbroken that my Grandad "A national treasure," has been taken down in such a filthy and underhand way, I hope that Brand and Ross are hung drawn and quartered and then burnt at the stake for saying such outrageous and shocking things.

    And you Russell?

    Well I've got a big knob and have done every drug available and so was bound to be a target for the righteous majority. Also the Internets make it quite cock easy to make a complaint. Plus the organs huh that leapt on this nonstory most were like undoubtedly those owned by the Rupert Murdoch fella with a vested interest in giving the BBC a kicking. Then of course the proles needed a break from the gloomy financial situation and the MP chaps have to be seen to be aware of what the fuck the chattering classes in their media swamped lives are talking about, hence questions in the house being raised.

    Dirty fucker!

    Dirty bastard.

    What a fucking rotter!

    Well that's it for tonight.

  120. Mark

    re: Other than the total ...

    Hey, I'm not slagging off his FAMILY, just him.

    A wee bit of a difference.

  121. Mark

    re: Yummy

    Unfortunately, I wouldn't get the chance.

    And I wouldn't ask her gramps for a piccie.

  122. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    a title is required

    Just because you don't like them or think they have 'no talent' doesn't mean they should get fired. If that was the case, there would be no-one left on tv. I don't like them much but they ARE 2 of the best entertainers these days (out of what's available). If they are both fired over this, that means there can be no more jokes on radio or TV ever. Because humour on TV is equal to this or of the cheesy variety.

    They didn't break any laws. Most if not all of the people complaining are obviously just jealous and are getting their kicks at the downfall of 2 incredibly successful people.

    Complaints are all one of the following:

    1) I don't like them at all! Good riddance, they are talentless, **** ********* ***** !!!11

    2) He gets paid HOW MUCH ??!111 AND I PAY FOR THIS ??

    3) How could you DO this to a poor old man!!! That joke was just not funny. Morals these days!

    4) I didn't hear it, but want to get involved in something important damn it!! Off with their heads!!

    None of those are valid arguments. None of it is illegal. Next.

  123. TimM


    "They didn't break any laws"

    Err, I think you'll find they did. It's just that Sachs didn't complain to the police. Nuisance calls are a criminal offence, and this clearly amounted to a nuisance call, even if it didn't start out as one. If someone did this to me, I'd be calling the police and my phone company. Even if it was someone famous!

    "None of those are valid arguments"

    The argument about how much he's paid, considering WE pay him, is very valid. We have every right to voice our opinions on how our money is spent (far more so than with other taxes).

    It's not about Jealously either. It's about sensible spending of money. If you were to find your local council spends £18m on entertainment rather than local services, you'd be rightly pissed off. In the case of the BBC, why should any employee get £18m whilst they struggle to make ends meet, cut costs and even have to sell the TV centre? The result is a reduction in quality of shows just to keep their prime "star" who doesn't even appeal broadly to the majority of the audience (unlike someone like Wogan who did).

    Brand is gone (though Ross is primarily to blame here for such a stupid outburst), Ross should take a major pay cut, or go find a commercial network that will pay him a similar salary (yeah, good luck. No one will offer anything like the Beeb did. No one with real commercial sense). I'm quite happy for both Ross and Brand to be on TV and radio, just not with Ross taking £18m of our money to do it.

    As for licence fee arguments. Yeah, commercial TV isn't so great and all that, but sorry the BBC has already gone so far downhill that going commercial will really not make much difference.

    P.S. Yes it was illegal. Next.

  124. Maty
    IT Angle

    If it was ...

    Just Wossie and Brand making that sort of comment to each other, I'd see no problem. But Sachs was not part of the show, and did not ask to be called up and have this stuff spouted at him. And when he heard it he asked for it not to be broadcast.

    But it was broadcast - and it was not 'mindless'. It was clever, cruel, sadistic and funny. Just as the worst kind of bullying can be. No doubt there is an audience for this kind of thing. It's just that most license payers don't want to pay for people who do that. Even if they don't watch it, and don't know its been done until later, they don't want it being done by people, whom, basically, they employ.

    The BBC management had the issue drawn forcibly to its attention, and belatedly took appropriate action. Story over. Can we go back to bitching about Vista please?

    IT angle because phones were involved?

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