back to article Stray left foot washes up on Vancouver beach

Canadian police are probing a possible link between a left foot which washed up yesterday on a beach near Vancouver and four right feet which have since last year similarly made landfall on the coast of British Columbia, the BBC reports. The mysterious spate of seaborne foot landings began last August when two right feet came …

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  1. Robert Govier
    Coat

    Overheard in a bar in British Columbia last week

    "Any idea why 4 right feet have been washed up recently?"

    "No, but I'd give my left foot to find out...."

  2. Brian
    Joke

    "Grown 5 Feet"

    That's hilarious. What other jokes can we come up with? Let's see...

    Canadian football team gaines 5 fold advantage?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Foothold situation

    I, for one, welcome our new podiatric overlords.

  4. Anonymously Deflowered
    Coat

    I've got a pile of coats here

    Ready to hand out to the inevitable "police think something is afoot" comment makers.

  5. Tom

    Ah yes...

    This will be an evolved sub-species of the Sole.

  6. Maurice Shakeshaft
    Coat

    They'll be able to ...

    fathom it out when they get the 6th foot.

    Sorry!

    Coat, hat, door...

  7. Gianni Straniero
    Coat

    "Bootnotes" indeed

    "We are certainly not discounting the possibility that this may be linked to the other recovered feet"

    One of the other feet at most, surely.

    "... why the coastline of British Columbia has grown five feet since last year"

    Sea levels falling in this part of the world?

    It's OK, I'm leaving.

  8. Steve Mann

    I say

    Something is definitely afoot here.

  9. Will
    IT Angle

    and the IT angle is...

    it was reported in the BBC website...??

  10. Ian Ferguson
    Happy

    Freak?

    Easy crime to solve - all they need to do is ask around for any family that is missing a man with four feet on his left leg that went jogging a few months ago.

  11. foof
    Pirate

    Dexter

    The show was televised on a local channel just before the feet started washing up.

    Coincidence? I think not.

  12. Dale Harrison
    Coat

    Footloose and fancy free?

    I couldn't believe the phrase:- While police say there is "no evidence that the feet were deliberately severed or removed by force",

    Am I allowed to be a teenager and say WTF !

    So feet are falling off now! This will be some Euro crap about feet being an imperial measure or something.

    Mind you, at least I can tell my wife that my willy is now officially improved to a length of... (consults ruler) 15 or something. (For the ladies reading I'm being modest :-) or talking in light years maybe)

    Anyway I'm going to get my 90cm coat now.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well, no

    ...While police say there is "no evidence that the feet were deliberately severed or removed by force"

    You've got to love police understatement and caution when things like this happen. No evidence eh? Well, no, I suppose not. They probably just "fell off", eh?

  14. ImaGnuber

    Where is...

    ...Daniel Day Lewis when you need him?

    Someone had to say it.

    Didn't they?

  15. Eden

    An Invasion? May I be the first to...

    Welcome our moist plantigrade overlords.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sharks don't like trainers?

    Just a thought...

    Or why do people throw their feet into the sea? And how can they walk away?

    EAfH, puzzled

  17. pctechxp

    Grown five feet

    Top class gag there, Mr. Haines as always.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Footloose

    Does the shoe on the left foot match the shoe on any right foot?

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    You found it

    That'll be the one that Daniel Day-Lewis has been looking for since '89...

  20. Tsu Dho Nimh
    Dead Vulture

    Forensics

    "Evidence of deliberate removal" would be tool marks on the bones (saw or knife), or tendons ripped from attachment points.

  21. C
    Dead Vulture

    that's grisly

    My first question would be DNA analysis to see if there are any matches?

    I feel morbid for even reading this article.

  22. Stu
    Alert

    Anybody know if these are human feet?

    ...I mean, come on, not one mention of the supposed owner species!!!

    Bears have feet too you know, they just go by the more traditional name - Paws.

    They are still feet though - I quote the always accurate (???) Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foot.

    There are animals all over that page! ;-)

  23. The Prevaricator

    they'll never make it to trial...

    They don't have a leg to stand on.

    /coat

    /door...

  24. John
    Black Helicopters

    Info is sparse

    They have been reporting on this news for a while here in the northwest. You would think they could give a little more detail, but they aren't. very interesting....

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Basic probability question...

    What's the probability that in a run of random foot tossings four right feet will turn up in a row?

    Mine's the one that's been dragging in the mud on the right hand side.

  26. Alfazed
    IT Angle

    could it be (the IT angle)

    that illegal imigrants have discovered a novel method of sneaking into Canada, having previously gained the assistance of Canadian beach combers via eMail message exchanges on Face Book or whatever .............

    Can't find my coat since my last humiliating exit.

    ALF

  27. Old Man - Grey Fleece
    Go

    Podiatric opinion

    I am glad that these feet were wearing trainers as these are well known to provide excellent support and to enhance the biomechanical function of the foot - good choice. Professional opinion provided by my wife.

  28. Jesse
    Joke

    No Evidence

    "We have no evidence that the feet were deliberately severed or removed by force" the detective was quoted as saying, "The shoelaces were still tied"

  29. Jon Tocker
    Coat

    @ Anonymously Deflowered

    police think something is afoot... I'll take a large in black if you have it - I could do with a new coat.

    So am I to understand that "Going clubbing in Canada" is to be replaced by "Going sole-searching in Canada"?

    Maurice Shakeshaft: If they had another 18,224 they'd be in a completely different league.

  30. heystoopid
    Paris Hilton

    Sounds like

    I was watching a BBC Horizon TV program first aired March 2008 recently about the what had happened to the body of the late Alistair Cooke called "How Much Is Your Dead Body Worth ?" where the report detailed that an illicit trade in body parts from funeral homes is worth big dollars due to the lack of donors and the answer was a surprising USD$261,500-00 !

    Now since one in seven literally die from assorted terminal cancers , these crooks motivated only by greed and lured by the high prices , they literally cut up the bodies in funeral homes to retrieve the wanted items charge the usual high fees and or merely hand wood ashes back to the grieving family and then live the high life on the proceeds from both jobs !

    Hmmm , after viewing that program and seeing these reports , one can suspect that some one in Canada or the US just across the border have been dumping the unsold parts from supposedly cremated bodies from assorted funeral homes at sea but have literally failed to take into account the coastal currents and tide changes !

    Truth can be stranger then fiction as some celebrities well know !

  31. Graham Marsden
    Coat

    If they find one more...

    ... will this mean a new series of Six Feet Under...?

  32. Mr Larrington
    Joke

    The police

    are currently attempting to determine the whereabouts of Jake the Peg's children.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sharks take a dump!

    I reckon that sharks ate some bodies but couldn't digest the trainers which still had the foot inside!

    If there are shark tooth marks on the trainers that might be a good clue...

    S

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    @ Stu - Anybody know if these are human feet

    Last time I looked, animals didn't wear trainers ... at least they don't here in the UK!

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    I don't believe this...

    ...it's just a legend (cough). Or at most a minor footnote in history. In fact, I'm surprised this story has legs, but if it is true, those responsible should tread carefully, since I'm sure the local plod will quickly step up to the mark.

    Bye.

  36. Jon Tocker

    @ heystoopid

    Sounds like a good incentive to arrange in your will that the medical/scientific community can *buy* your body from your heirs for a "mere" $200,000 (saving them $61,500) and your family, instead of being $5,000+ poorer, will have a couple of hundred grand to play with.

    Only people who will lose out are the unscrupulous bastards who'd charge your family > $5,000 and sell your corpse for $261,500.

    BTW, I've also heard of the rogues stripping the coffins of all the fancy extras you bought to send off your beloved in style so they can sell them again to the next poor saps who want a fancy coffin with all the trimmings.

    And do we really believe that that beautiful casket with all the brass on it that you *bought* actually goes into the furnace when the body is cremated?

    Since "vulture" has already been appointed to journos, I propose "buzzard" to refer to funeral directors - they both live off the dead.

  37. Barry Rueger

    Bootnotes?

    Oh, how clever.......

  38. Brad Darwin
    Black Helicopters

    There is an explination

    The story they've been floating around is that these are just the feet of regular old missing/drowned/dead bodies. The bodies sink once they've been in the water long enough, but the ankle joint is fairly weak and breaks as decomposition begins. Since the feet were all encased in trainers (which are buoyant), they float to the surface once free of the body. The foot washes ashore, leaving the rest of the body behind.

    The fact that there have been four left feet is just coincidence.

    Black helicopter because this is what they WANT you to believe.

  39. Bob
    Pirate

    It's a twisted fact but...

    ...where people have attempted or even succeeded in committing suicide by leaping from bridges, cliffs etc it has been documented that from above a certain heights feet have a habit of snapping off on hitting the water.

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hospital waste

    Probably Gangster waste firms dumping hospital waste out at sea.

    Also Christy brown had both feet, how ever his left foot was very dexterous and allowed him to paint and write.

  41. Neil
    Coat

    Foot-sea

    My friend has 2 left feet....he wears flip flips.

    Coat

    Gone.

  42. herman Silver badge
    Dead Vulture

    Sharks won't eat sneakers?

    I wonder what sneaker brand is so stinky that even sharks won't eat them?

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    @Jun Tucker

    "and your family, instead of being $5,000+ poorer, will have a couple of hundred grand to play with"

    You don't seem to have considered the tax implications of the transaction. Death, taxes, coat, door, etc.

  44. Jon Tocker

    @ AC 18/6/08 16:56

    "You don't seem to have considered the tax implications of the transaction. Death, taxes, coat, door, etc."

    Don't post anonymously - I like to know the names of those who brighten my morning with laughter.

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step...

    So, I think it's moderately safe to assume that the victims were within 500 miles of the initial foot sightings?

    Its stories like this that really creep me out as I don't really know if it's an actual tragedy or more of a foot fetish, gone slightly awry… I mean talk about the moral paradox (or in this case podidox)!

    And not to discount any conclusive evidence that may suggest that sharks have a more discriminating palette or smart fashion sense to be seen consuming or caught dead wearing a single "trainer", let alone both, remains to be seen. I've personally seen distant fresh water relatives of sharks consume some things that best not be mentioned in a public forum, the best of which could hardly be more appetizing that a leather clad foot.

    That's it, leaving without any fanfare as this is just wrong on so many different levels...

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hmm

    So if I need an organ I know were to go

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