Haha
Liked that one a lot! Nice work :)
BOFH: Licensing model
So the Boss had sensed a touch of animosity between us and one of our main software vendors after a recent bill and decided to grab the bull by the horns and invite them in to press-the-flesh and explain the new charging model they applied to us - without notice. Apparently, their reasoning ends up being that the new …
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Friday 18th April 2008 11:56 GMT Mats Schuh
Right to the spot
Right on! One of the best BOFH episodes I have been reading in recent times...having to manage different applications that all require intermingling licensing schemes (say, flex-servers, dongles, flex-servers+dongles blah) is definitely one of the most time killing, annoying and superfluous parts of the job.
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Friday 18th April 2008 15:07 GMT Rosuav
Best episode in a while!
Laughed loudly enough to wake my brother.
RE: "It almost seems that the BOFH just sat back" - The BOFH and the PFY work as a team. They have a real partnership. A partnership of mutual respect and cooperation, working together toward a common goal. They always work WITH each other, never against each other - you'd never find the PFY stealing the money that the BOFH had hidden under the false bottom of the fire extinguisher, and you'd certainly never find the BOFH stuck in a darkened basement with a laptop as his only source of light AND his only hammer. Nor will you ever EVER find them electrocuting each other with cattle prods. Oh no. This is a genuine partnership.
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Friday 18th April 2008 15:07 GMT Anonymous Coward
But
You missed out the option of pouring it into a plastic cup ... and the associated licence transfer fee.
I remember in the late 1980s, if you bought a Sun Workstation you had to buy a SunOS "Right To Use" licence. If you then sold it, the new owner had to buy their own "Right To Use" licence, as yours was non transferable. I didn't know there were software vendors out there who could still make these sorts of shenanigans stick.
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Friday 18th April 2008 15:08 GMT Roland Korn
Oops - looks like the Boss let his guard down.
"No," #1 responds. "I was just wondering what your manager will think about this extortion?"
"Not a lot I shouldn't think", I respond. "Given that the muffins he had at the beginning of your presentation was made in a certain porcelain mixing bowl."
So when the muffins hit the fan......
I thought the old guy had a healthy sense of self preservation when dealing with the BOFH? At least he will live and learn from the errors in his reasoning.
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Friday 18th April 2008 15:35 GMT Dennis
porcelain device
I wonder .... is the use of a "porcelain device" sufficiently reliable. Just thinking about it creates nausea. But is this enough. Don't you need a Mocha topping from Exlax trigger the right results? Even better - chocolate chip muffins.
It was on the radio earlier this week, a headmaster was discouraged from nicking the chocolate digestive biscuits. Spent the afternoon in a much smaller office.
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Friday 18th April 2008 17:55 GMT Fluffykins
Simon: Your invoice
Review of BOFH episode #14: £150
Display maintenance : £25 (Well, I did have to wipe the screen where I laughed out loud and spluttered coffee over it)
Display Interface adjustment £10.00 ( My glasses WERE too far down my nose)
HMI usage fees: £5.00 (Well, I DID use the mouse to get here)
So, I reckon you owe me about £180.
Plus VAT.
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Friday 18th April 2008 17:55 GMT A J Stiles
Knew there was a reason
I knew there was a reason why we migrated to 100% Open Source four years ago ..... because of bollocks like this.
The expression on the FAST guy's face [we suspect someone tried to get us busted for the reward money] when we told him that we had no measures in place to prevent staff from copying application software from their workstations (because there was no need to ..... everything on there was Open Source and so quite legal to copy), in fact we would encourage it, was absolutely priceless. (Actually we had one partial, implicit measure in place. None of the machines had floppy drives or CD writers; and in those days, root passwords -- not issued to anyone except the IT department -- were required to mount USB devices.)
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Friday 18th April 2008 19:34 GMT Fred
for those who read such bollocks
READ CAREFULLY.
By reading this email, you agree, on behalf yourself and your employer, to release me from all obligations and waivers arising from any and all NON-NEGOTIATED agreements, licenses, terms-of-service, shrinkwrap, clickwrap, browsewrap, confidentiality, non-disclosure, non-compete and acceptable use policies ("BOGUS AGREEMENTS") that I have (or may have, or might in the future) entered into with your employer, its partners, licensors, agents and assigns, in perpetuity, without prejudice to my ongoing rights and privileges. You further represent that you have the authority to release me from any BOGUS AGREEMENTS on behalf of yourself and your employer.
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Saturday 19th April 2008 03:44 GMT Bill
Yes...but
This may seem like nitpicking ...but... The PFY did not in fact supply a cup of coffee ....he supplied a cup of water with some coffee diluted into it ....which I suppose is a breach of contract ....leading to ......[ you fill in the rest ....I have gone too far ]
Paris would have noticed...
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Sunday 20th April 2008 22:06 GMT Paul
sadly not as made up as you'd think
ok, so who here has bought or sold (or considered) cisco kit on ebay? the IOS licenses are not transferrable, so when you sell you should wipe it clean, and buy you should buy your own IOS (which would cost more than the kit)!
if your company is bought or goes bust, any cisco kit is devalued because the licenses cannot be transferred either!
so, in essence, cisco kit second hand is basically a brick.
this also used to be the case with EMC, but you'd have to check that.
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Monday 21st April 2008 04:41 GMT Jon Tocker
Brilliant episode!
Had me laughing aloud for the first time in a while.
David:
The fact that it was the BOFH who mentioned the muffins, I don't think he was "sitting back". As Dr. Mouse said: "Why have a dog and bark yourself?"
Couldn't happen to a more deserving target.
Got to go now and pay the EULA licencing fee in order to read the copyrighted licence for the copyrighted software, will be going via a certain porcelain bowl and the coffee machine...
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Monday 21st April 2008 09:38 GMT A J Stiles
@ Paul
Unfortunately, the terms and conditions attempting to forbid the resale of software licences with used equipment run afoul of what the Law of the Land calls "the doctrine of Exhaustion of Rights". This is what allows you to resell copyrighted books, CDs, video games &c. There can be no breach of copyright because no copy is made.
If Cisco or a similar vendor ever take you to court for dealing in their used kit, **they will lose** because they are trying to stop you from doing something that you are already allowed to do, and the practice will be stopped.
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Biting the hand that feeds IT
