back to article Google absolved of 'crimes against humanity'

Shuka-shuka-shuka-shuka-shuka. Black helicopters were spotted over Scranton, Pennsylvania last week, as Dylan Stephen Jayne saw his civil rights lawsuit against Google flushed once and for all down the proverbial toilet. As some may recall, Jayne had an epiphany back on September 16th, 2007, after he discovered that his …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Thats right make fun of the mentally ill.

    Whats the matter no starving children, or homeless elderly to taunt. This is about as funny as a crutch only a very mediocre person points out the failings of a diseased mind to make themselves look better. I'm talking about the American Justice system of course though the Plaintiff was pretty loopy as well.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    I'm Offended

    I decry the lack of professional journalism exhibited in this article - everyone knows that Black Helicopters (TM) make a "wokka wokka wokka" sound. Get it right next time!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Disturbed

    Exactly when did mental illness become a spectator sport?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    Actually...

    ...the Idaho panhandle is hip deep + in snow and just a tiny bit chilly right about now.

    Speaking as one who's in comfortable rock-throwing distance from the place, we'd prefer that the nutters remain either on the east coast or in Kalifornia - where they've lots of company and the locals are used to their antics.

    Thanks.

  5. Erik Aamot
    Stop

    @ Anonymous Coward ~ Disturbed

    mental illness, or at least admittedly disturbed behavior, became a spectator sport here with that 4th post of yours

    is your last name Jayne by any chance ?

  6. Charles Manning

    Black helicopter sound

    Please get your paranoia correct. Due to their silenced felt covered rotors black helicopters make a low "pu pu pu pu pu" sound.

  7. Steve Roper
    Black Helicopters

    A quick tute on making Black Helicopter noises

    You can't say "shuka-shuka-shuka" or "wokka-wokka-wokka" fast enough to emulate the high-speed turbine-powered blades of these dreaded machines. The correct onomatopoeia is "digadigadigadiga", uttered as fast as you can move your tongue between the "d" and "g". For a more realistic effect, gradually vary the shape of your mouth from wide to pursed as you make the sound; this creates the doppler-phasing effect as the helicopter flies overhead: "digadigadigadigadogadogadogadogadoogadoogadoogadoogadugadugaduga..." Clinch your lips more tightly as the helicopter fades into the distance (for now!) to replicate the deepening "thudding" note of it getting further away...

    A bit of practice with this and you too can make your co-workers look at you like you ought to be locked up! ;D

  8. Stuart Van Onselen
    Joke

    Effort

    "A bit of practice with this and you too can make your co-workers look at you like you ought to be locked up! ;D"

    Why would I go to all that trouble? They already do...

    (Is there a "I wish I was Joking" icon?)

  9. Andy

    He's a Dubya supporter

    Point 13 of his handwritten complaint reads "Plaintiff and defendant(s) have a responsibility to fight the War on Terrorism"

    So we can see that at least somebody buys the bullshit the American government spews out.

  10. Simon
    Stop

    @ Steve Roper

    Thank you very much, a good laugh but you owe me a new keyboard! ;-)

    Stop: because it probably should!

  11. Sean Ellis
    Go

    Thomas Jefferson said it...

    "Ridicule is the only weapon that can be used against unintelligible propositions. Ideas must be distinct before reason can act upon them."

    (Thanks to Mark Crislip of Quackcast for bringing this wonderful quote to my attention.)

  12. Michael H.F. Wilkinson
    Black Helicopters

    Black helicopters?

    the REALLY scary ones are the completely silent ones, you know, the ones the goverment won't tell us about. They are invisible too. And black.

  13. Andy Worth

    Re:Helicopter sounds....

    Wasn't "Wokka-Wokka" the noise the Fozzy bear made?

    And I have to agree with Steve Roper, you definitely can get looks like you deserve to be locked up for practicing this.....as I got just now when "testing" out the various sounds. I also agree with his interpretation of the noise, and the doppler effect....just ask a 5 year old what a helicopter sounds like.

    As for "pu pu pu pu pu".....sorry but that's the noise my farts make the morning after a Guinness session.

  14. Mark

    Re: Black helicopter sound

    Can you guys please work out how many blades black helicopters have.

    If it's "wokawokawoka" then it has four. "shuf shuf shuf" is two and "digadigadiga" would either be four or five. They won't be using heavy-lift helicopters, so that's "dddddddd" out of the picture...

    Oh, the anorak please.

    Ta.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    phut phut phut phut

    ...is the sound of the black helicopters around my way. Do they have regional accents perhaps?

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Genius

    To all posting about the noises black helicopters make. I haven't laughed so much in ages. Stuff the story about the mental yank, more helicopter noise analysis please.

  17. Mike Morris
    Alert

    Worse yet...

    This loon is eligible to vote in my state.

  18. James
    Alien

    Actually, I'm somewhat impressed

    I looked at his filings, which seriously looks like it was constructed and worded entirely by himself. The filings, while very poorly formated (a hand drawn form?) he does know something about the courts in drawing up his complaint, and actually submitted in the correct format (but the style was poor). He also used some specific legal terms in his arguments that would not be ordinarily known, so he has some intelligence or good research abilities. I would be more impressed if he had come up with case law to support his position. *Getting* case law for encoded SS#s would be difficult, but there are a lot of judgments and ruling that give a lot of leeway in interpretation and scope (and the nastier rulings are well known and most heavily addressed and constrained by higher courts). If he could write that complaint, he could've done the basic research and at least get some case law on his side. It wouldn't have helped, but it would make the filing better.

  19. Lars Silver badge
    Dead Vulture

    Deja vu

    The SCO case comes to mind.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    "wokka-wokka-wokka"

    That's no black helicopter - that's a space-sta^W^W pac-man.

  21. blue
    Dead Vulture

    goddam it

    i was hoping he'd win :(

    *cancels lawsuit*

  22. Erik Aamot

    what you gotta do is ...

    listen, regular phonics just don't cut it for black©opter sounds

    you start with 'tchu.tchu.tchu.tchu ....' like a steam engine sound but faster ..

    then you close, but loosen you lips, relaxing your checks, allowing them to puff out, allowing the initial 't' in each 'tchu' to puff out air through the ends of your lightly closed lips

    very supressored .. errr ... muffled sound ...

    warning: practicing this sound properly may result in small dots of spit being deposited on your monitor

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