back to article 'Suspicious comment' provokes LAX terminal evacuation

The FBI yesterday detained an unnamed passenger who provoked a two-hour closure of a terminal at Los Angeles International Airport by making a "suspicious comment". Details are sketchy, but the unnamed man was on Southwest Airlines flight 1182 from El Paso, Texas, when he apparently joked to another passenger that he had …

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  1. Robert Ramsay
    Joke

    obviously...

    He was shouting "The government is barmy!"

    He was fined $50 for a breach of the peace, and sentenced to 20 years for revealing a state secret.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    And the suspicious comment was...

    "My goodness, I'm really impressed with the quality and efficacy of these airport security arrangements... I'm impressed..."

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Comment

    I wonder if he used the coat icon?

  4. Michael Jolly
    Pirate

    so..

    .. you can now be detained if you say something that is "suspicious" i feel that somebody has been a little overzellious there,

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    All your thoughts & comments are belong to us!

    I guess Bin laden/AL Qaida has succeeded beyond his wildest dreams by getting under the American's skin, helped in no small measure by the media Propoganda & frenzy whipped up by the Bush Admin.

    Such paranoid knee jerk reactions are proof enough of that!

    Its more like a war on peoples psche now. All your thoughts are belong (& to be controlled by) to us, even if inappropriate!

  6. James

    What did he say?

    I'd be curious to know what he said that provoked that level of response.

  7. s. pam
    Thumb Down

    Fair Dinkum

    is enough to get you arrested for speaking back to a US flight attendant a few months ago.....wonder what it was this time? Dain Bread?

  8. Mark Ashworth
    Coat

    What a surprise

    I got held at George Bush Intercontinental (Houston) for 45 minutes at gunpoint, to have every item in my laptop bag chemical tested for explosive.

    Then to have the counter assistant say... it was a false positive.... A FALSE POSITIVE.... I was shitting myself surrounded by guys with machine guns pointed at me without explaination...

    Obviously my laptop and a copy of Jackass the movie were going to cause a terrorist incident.. either that or me wearing a green day t-shirt upset them...

    Mine's the coat with the wires hanging out the back.

  9. g e

    hehehehe

    Next time you go to USA, pick a random person you don't like the look of and then say to some security guard 'I heard him saying something like "our glorious brothers"' or something suitably spy-parody-comical

  10. Steve
    Alert

    Terrorism just got easier.

    Al-Qaeda training can now be done by mail as all they will need to disable the transportation system is a group of people distributed around the country making suspicious comments in airports.

  11. Duncan Hothersall
    Heart

    And so we continue to do precisely the opposite of what we should do

    Anyone who remembers the IRA's bombing campaigns in the UK will know that the governmental response at the time, whilst often hugely overblown in its treatment of Irish people, was essentially to ensure "business as usual" for as many people as possible.

    Since 9/11 the US, and by extension the UK because we now apparently take the lead from them in this area, have operated quite the opposite policy, and it is a disaster. They and we now jump at the slightest squeak, talk up every threat, and promote the idea that if one terrorist attack is prevented then this policy is justified.

    No, it isn't.

    We need to say to anyone who wants to change us via terrorism that while we will do our best to stop them, we will not change our lives to achieve that. We need to say that you can continue to blow us up, but you will not change our minds. We need to tell them that they will not make us run scared by threat alone. To make a difference they will have to penetrate our defences every time. A threat, or a failed attempt, should have no impact on our lives.

    It seems cliched and obvious to say it, but terrorists win when we react to them, in any way. Yes we should continue to act to prevent acts of terror when we discover them; but we must get far better and facing down the threat, telling and showing them that we are not scared of them, and that we will not capitulate.

    Otherwise we have already lost.

  12. Karl Lattimer

    thought police

    obviously if he said something suspicious he must be a dissident! its the facial twitch that gives you away, you'll all have to use doublethink and doublespeak from now on!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Watch for the post justification, & 911

    Watch for the post idiocy witchhunt, where, having blow some guys comments out of proportion, they will then attempt to punish him hard for their own idiocy to justify the situation.

    Particularly watch for the mention of 911, that's a dead giveaway that they know they were overreacting.

    Same as the Boston bomb scare when they blew up "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" LED signs then tried to prosecute the ad agency for making this 'terrorist hoax' that existed only in the mind of the Tom Menino mayor of Boston.

  14. Stu
    Pirate

    Under their skin...

    Too true, just reminds me of the student woman who was busted for walking thru an airport with circuit boards stuck to her in various places. Some kind of art stunt. You see circuit boards = Bomb triggers.

    And to a lesser extent the whole Boston Mooninite fiasco a year ago - Some comedy channel publicity stunt involving an LED illuminated cartoon character billboard thing, hung in various places throughout Boston - put the whole city into DEFCON ONE! TERROR ALERT TERROR ALERT TERROR ALERT.

    You see LED illuminated cartoon characters = Bomb.

    The TV and print press, and various government departments all contributed towards it.

    Idiots.

  15. Ferry Boat

    I know what he said

    'Watch me sneak this 105 millilitres of mineral water onto a plane.'

  16. Matthew
    Unhappy

    @ Duncan Hothersall

    If we change the way we do things in response to acts of terror, abandon our principles and crack down on our citizens we lose.

    We have abandoned our principles and cracked down on our citizens.

    Therefore, we have already lost.

    Quad Erat Demonstrandum.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    Probably trying to be "humourous"

    Jokes and (especially US) security people don't mix.

    Few years ago on BBC "airport" series there was as wise-guy with a violin case who when asked by security what was inside thought he'd be funny and said "I come from Chicago and we keep guns in these" ... and was the shocked to find police were called, he was arrested, cautioned and informed that the airline (one of the big US ones) had placed a lifetime ban on him. And this was well before 9/11 etc.

    Similarly I heard someone describing how before flight from US to UK they'd been pulled over for random security screen. After placing all bags, items etc on counter for search she noticed mobile phone was still on so she picked it up saying "I better turn this off before I get on the plane as we don't want it to crash" (meaning she was following rules on no mobiles on in flights) ... however US security interpreted this as a direct threat to the flight (and told other family members travelling with her this) and immediately pulled her off the flight. Fortunately she was travelling with BA so after several hours of grilling by security pilot from next BA flight interviewed her and rapidly concluded there was no problem and was happy to allow her on the plane but added that due to what US security had sad there was still a questionmark as to whether Heathrow would allow a plane carrying her to land ... in the end it was all ok.

    Maybe security do need to take everything seriously but there's a point where some common sense should come into the equation!

  18. Craig Foster

    He said...

    "I watch me sneak a litre of Dioxihydride on board"

  19. Geoff Mackenzie
    Coat

    I think all these comments ...

    ... are pretty suspicious to be honest.

  20. Matt

    @Duncan Hothersal

    Couldn't have put it better myself!

  21. jim

    Muslim

    Apparently he looked like a Muslim. Need I say more ?

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Q. Anything to declare sir?

    A. Yeah baby, I got something explosive in my pants for you.

    Of course, your average terrorist who has spent the best part of a year planning his own fiery death is prone to making stupid mistakes just like this. You'd think that stopping someone who behaves suspiciously would be a waste of limited resources, surely the terrorists are trying extremely hard NOT to draw attention.

    BTW, I use Linux, I roleplay and I listen to 'Heavy Metal' so I am pretty much never getting into the USA (unless I cross the border from Canada).

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Duncan Hothersall

    Here in Spain everytime there is some injustice associated to ETA, or the anniversary of the Madrid train bombings, invariably there are marches the following weekend with people waving white sheets about and ranting on about peace in virtually every major city. If a death was involved then the marches might be on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Also a time will be given for a miuntes silence when everybody except me will pile out into the streets in observation. I sit there alone in the office thinking what better way to show the terrorists that people are taking notice of them, what better way to encourage them to do worse next time and get a bigger reaction. I explain this to my colleagues and though they can see the logic behind this they still go out.

    I was a student in London during a very active time of the IRA and the most reactionary thing I can remember is the police taking away the rubbish bins from the streets. How things have changed...

  24. Omer Ozen
    Joke

    I know

    He probably ticked the box where it reads "Are you or have you ever been a member of a terrorist organisation?"

  25. Steve Taylor

    @Duncan Hothersall

    While I totally agree with the sentiment, I think your memory is a bit suspect. Perhaps you never had to drive into the City of London during the IRA campaigns, past the road blocks, cameras, and armed police. Not really "business as usual".

  26. Bill
    Coat

    Just remember the Foreign Office advice:

    "LOCAL LAWS AND CUSTOMS

    Do not make flippant remarks about bombs or terrorism, especially when passing through US airports."

  27. xjy
    Paris Hilton

    Daleks

    He himself said nothing, it was his dvd with classic Dr Whos and the Daleks were intoning w-e s-h-a-l-l e-x-t-e-r-m-i-n-a-t-e y-o-u . Obviously resonated with the security peeps.

    Anyway, the only way to survive a trip to the land of the brave and home of the free is to switch everything off and go zombie during the journey. Name rank and number is all. No jokes, no smiles, no thinking, no silent insubordination, no emotion. Zombie role: big polished shoes, white socks, an ulcer, and BO.

    Once you're thru the gate, though, way-hay!!

    (Paris, showing us how to think during the trip...)

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: Steve Taylor

    I was a student, the BSM (Blessed Saint Maggie) had just over turned Red Kens' public transport charges and I couldn't afford a bloody bus fare so I had to walk everywhere. So this is very early eighties, the memory might be going but I think the camera stuff came much later.

  29. Luke Wells

    Maybe......

    Maybe he said "If I don't get to the toilet soon I am going to explode"

  30. Laurie

    Re Steve Taylor and AC

    You're referring to the "Ring of Steel". This was a response to the early '90sbombing campaign by the IRA where they blew up the Baltic Exchange and Bishopsgate. Way back in the '70s, and '80s, it was pretty much business as usual.

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: Steve Taylor

    Granted, the armed police and roadblocks were there (much like they're nowadays swarming through airports) but the difference is they werent at the stage of evacuating london and carting you off to a "detention facility" for trying to pass one of the road blocks with a brake light out.

    Nowadays, that'd be a clear indication that obviously your brake light isnt working because you re-wired the electrics for it to the hundred pounds of semtex you clearly have strapped to the underside of the car.

  32. JimS

    Probably...

    ...just said something like "I'd vote for Obama" and it all went smelly from there.

  33. Dalek13
    Joke

    Re: Terrorism just got easier

    No, easier than that. New budget terrorist kit:

    1 x packet of Post-Its

    1 x biro

    Instructions for use:

    1) Write suspicious comment on Post-It

    2) Stick to backs/fronts/sides of random passing people

    3)Errr...that's it.

  34. Gilleain Torrance
    Happy

    Dioxyhydride? Sounds suspicious.

    If you'd said "Dihydrogenmonoxide" I might have let you off with a caution, but O<sub>2</sub>H sounds...expolosive.

    To gitmo with him!

  35. Andy S
    Coat

    I'm surprised

    That you're still allowed to take such a potectially explosive liquid as water onto a plane. Lets face it, if an aeroplane toilet is the equivalent of the sort of chemical lab required to make a liquid explosive, then seperating water into its, highly explosive, components using one shouldn't be too hard.

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    UK and IRA

    I was a policeman during some of this time and a student in London later and, even later, working in the centre of London. Apart from very special cases, I know for a fact fact that in most of life the IRA, despite their successful acts, were widely ignored in that day to day life went on as normal, despite some annoying delays at major stations as I tried to get home. There were even three IRA bomb explosion in the road where I lived as a student.

    I, even as a policeman myself, do not recall seeing armed police evident on streets, stations or airports. Apart from the removal of litter bins and some worry about tartan holdalls (at one time a favoured way of carrying explosives), I recall no fear and no avoidance of Irish people (indeed, some good police colleagues and fellow students were Irish and very much liked as such). I knew people who had been caught up in Birmingham and the Harrods bomb, still no fear and loathing, at least in my circles.

    Of course, a big difference was that the USA was supporting the IRA with money and arms, so that was all right then. Wonder why it took the USA so long to discover "terrorism". Perhaps that is the difference.

    Even English speakers are adopting Americanisms as fast as possible; that affects the way we think. Is that part of the problem? Funny, mainland Europe seems to have less fear, even though far from immune.

    Anonymous for working reasons.

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    That Dihydrogen Monoxide is dangerous stuff

    A container of 100mls is enough to kill someone, even the flight crew. Highly corrosive; almost anything dissolves in it. Can react explosively with metal given the right encouragement.

  38. michael
    Coat

    suspicous

    no no I did not make a suspicous comment no no do not drag me away plese noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

  39. Adrian Bool

    @ xjy...

    ...all you've forgot is the mandatory bible...

  40. David S

    That comment in full:

    "Does anyone here remember Noraid?"

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Airport Security?

    I recently flew from Manchester to Amsterdam via Gatwick. I had the full security check at Manchester and then, even though I went through flight "transfers" at Gatwick I had to go through the security rigmarole again not once but twice, a seperate x-ray of my shoes after having gone through the x-ray / metal detectors the first time.

    Contrast this with my Experience at Amsterdam. I walked into the airport, walked straight to the gate for my flight where I went through a normal x-ray / metal detector. No long queues for everyone in the airport to get through just a simple x-ray machine and a metal detector dedicated to that gate.

    I know I didn't feel any less safe at Amsterdam but I did feel a little more relaxed!

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fearthink

    "Funny, mainland Europe seems to have less fear, even though far from immune."

    I think you're mistaking something else for actual fear amongst the populace.

    I was much more concerned that the IRA might detonate a device in my vicinity than I am that some deluded God-botherer will. The IRA were far more active.

    What you're seeing and identifying as "fear" is the Government's attempts to inculcate Fear as our base mental state. It's working to some extent, but as far as I can tell amongst my friends, colleagues and other associates, it's generating more resentment than fear.

    Everyone knows that the 100ml restriction on liquids in the passenger cabin of aircraft is utter codswallop and resents having to remove their shoes.

    Everyone knows that all the government control measures have nothing to do directly with defeating Terrorism and everything to do with trying to make themselves look good so we'll vote for them next time. This becomes a self-sustaining vicious circle as they have to keep adding to their excesses to maintain the illusion that they a) know what they're doing and b) are acting only in our best interests.

    Another thing that feeds the paranoia-generators is the fear of having not been seen to have done "everything possible" to prevent atrocities. Our *leaders* are *terrified* of the terrorists. Look at Spain. The Spanish Government got blamed for the Madrid train bombings and was, to all intents and purposes, overthrown by it. Or that's the way it looks to the terrorists and to the gutless wonders we've got in charge of us.

    HMG fears an atrocity, not for the deaths that would occur, but for the public relations backlash.

  43. Dennis
    Coat

    He'd just seen his mate ....

    Obviously he had just seen his mate and called across the lounge: "Hi Jack".

    I'm off to delete all Johns from my address book.

  44. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Alot of people mentioned the 'Troubles' so..

    I thought it worth mentioning that the only time there was any headway made in finding a solution was when they all started thinking pragmatically and sitting down to resolve the underlining issues, which there was even the DUP stopped saying 'Never/No'.

    Terrorism just doesn't pop out of thin air after all. The internments, thousands of soldiers and hardline RUC done nothing to curb the problems diplomacy and reconcilary action did.

  45. Charles Manning

    Dihydrogen Monoxide is safe

    In some countries they even add it to your drinking water.

  46. Hollerith

    what was that motto again?

    'Land of the free and the home of the brave'?

    Now, land of the free and home of the weenies, or more accurately, land of the self-suppressed and home of the we-jump-when-a-canary-says-boo.

    I live in London and was here during the busy IRA time in the 80s. There was a real bomb in the tube station just below my building. We were told to stay away from the plate glass windows, and that was that.

    The former stoic courage and plegmatic calm of the British was always admirable. I'm sorry that we now see a rise in the flap-doodle, let's-make-everything-a-drama mentality, presumably shipped over from the States.

  47. J
    Joke

    @ Airport Security

    "I know I didn't feel any less safe at Amsterdam but I did feel a little more relaxed!"

    Hm... Maybe it was something in the air? Airpot security indeed...

  48. Curtis W. Rendon
    Alert

    remark

    He probably said: "security sucks"

  49. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    I was lucky

    Coming back from the US once, I was singled out for a brief pat-down, then I was asked what I had in my pocket. I replied "gum" and took out a mangled packet of chuddy to show him. At the time, being a worn out unit of airline cattle, I wondered why he gave me a funny look. On a later connecting flight when I had chance to think about it, I shat myself.

  50. Graham Marsden
    Thumb Down

    @Just remember the Foreign Office advice:

    "Don't bother visiting America, go somewhere else instead!"

    PS "The Ring of Steel" in London was more commonly known as "The Ring of Tissue Paper" given how easy it was to get through...

  51. Antony Riley
    Thumb Up

    Tourism

    All the fear mongering probably does you a favour when it comes to tourism. I wonder how many would-be-tourists are scared away because of all the bother ?

    Come to London, be harassed by police and be fearful of being blown up!

    Goes doubly for yankland.

    I'm off down the pub to experiment with mixing Ethanol and Dihydrogen Monoxide.

    -Antony

  52. Matt Berg
    Stop

    @Fearthink

    I believe you will find that the "Popular Party" (Partido Popular) were overthrown in Spain for saying that ETA had caused the Madrid train bombings and carried on saying so, despite evidence to the contrary.

  53. Tris Orendorff
    Unhappy

    I'm Surprised

    I'm surprised that this doesn't happen more in the LA airport with all those TV and movie execs constantly jabbering about ratings, starlets, hits and BOMBs.

  54. John A Blackley

    Git

    The guy made a 'joke' about having explosives in his luggage (RTFA) and is, consequently, a brainless git.

    Or perhaps he couldn't read the signs - posted, in at least two languages, all over the approach to the security area - saying "Do not make jokes about potential breaches of security".

  55. Matt Bucknall

    Didn't this happen...

    ...to some British school kid a while back too?

  56. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    perfumes OK, H2O no way

    He probably pointed out the irony that you can't take a bottle of water onto a plane, but you can carry multiple bottles of after shave and a lighter.

  57. Alan Wilkinson
    Unhappy

    The morons are in charge

    We put morons in charge of our lives and they employ idiots to carry out their orders. Why is anyone surprised at the results?

  58. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    There's A Time & A Place For Jokes

    2000: Travelling back to Blighty from New York with three mates. I'd already made several suggestive comments on the way to the airport about how I'd like to get very intimate with some good looking American girls. Especially ones in uniform and how there would be a massive explosion of love... You know the sort of stuff. Think David Coverdale and Whitesnake lyrics and you're on the right track.

    Get to the airport, check in bags, answer all the questions properly and politely. Get through security and on the way to the gate when a small uniformed Hobbit like creature approached me and asked if she (I think) could please check my backpack. She proceeds to open a sachet and wipes it over the bag.

    My three mates are stood off some distance. I try to make conversation with the creature and ask what she (I think) is checking for. Deadpan comes the response:

    "I'm looking for traces of explosives, sir"

    That's it, my mates are on the floor wetting themselves. They're taking bets on whether I've got the gall/cojones/stupidity repeat my comment from earlier. I saw a small diamond shaped scar where the operation to remove the sense of humour had been carried out on the uniformed creature facing me.

    A night in a New York prison did not appeal to me, so I said "Oh." and kept my peace.

    One mate had to change his underwear he had been laughing so hard.

    If I can turn down a chance to make a lewd, suggestive joke because there's at least one night in prison facing me if I do then surely even the meanest intellect can figure out you don't make jokes about bombs at or around airports.

  59. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    To be fair

    Even at my local hick airport (East Midlands) there are plenty of signs up that say things like "do not joke about dangerous / illegal substances in your luggage as these will be taken seriously"

    Now, what fuckwit, in any day and age let alone today's absolute age of paranoia jokes about having explosives in his luggage at an airport and expects the authorities to not do the following:

    (1) point guns at him

    (2) shout a lot

    (3) examine every little item he has in his possession

    (4) examine every orifice where anything can be hidden

    (5) pull him from the flight

    (6) prosecute him

    (7) deport / travel ban him

    (9) place him on the "no flight" list

    Should have just assumed it was a bomb jacket and shot him. SO19 would have shown you how to do it.

  60. Morely Dotes

    @ AC

    "Maybe security do need to take everything seriously but there's a point where some common sense should come into the equation!"

    If they had common sense, they'd be holding down a real, productive job instead of making strangers take of their shoes.

    The US Administration has profited greatly from inculcating the gullible with the "War on Terror" and the UK government has seen that and enviously tried to outdo Bush & Co.

    Only the stupid and the deliberately ignorant can fail to see that the "War on Terror" is in fact a war on the free citizens of both nations, and a bald-faced attempt to abrogate the freedoms guaranteed by the blood of the generations that have gone before, as far back as the Magna Carta.

    There's nothing remotely funny about the modern Schutzstaffel.

  61. Mark
    Unhappy

    "placed a lifetime ban on him"

    His response:

    Well, I'm happy not to fly with a bunch of fucktards.

    Respons: Gitmo.

  62. Nordrick Framelhammer

    He probably said

    "I have just read an explosive story that will blow the entire corrupt Bush regime apart" at which point some looney inbred George Bush fanatic to stupid to get any jobs better than airport security guard decided the guy was clearly a threat not only to the US but the entire universe, After all, isn't the US the centre of everything?

    Seriously though, the guy is a complete lackwit. Anyone that does that deserves to have a full cavity search done by someone with hands the size a xmas ham. But did they need to close the entire airport for 2 hours?

  63. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    metal defector

    with the court's permission, i'll copy and paste an excerpt from an article i posted on my blog a while back, featuring one of my own brief encounters with intellectually challenged airport security:

    mid 1990s - manchester airport

    i am waiting to pass through airport security, on my way to malaga airport in spain, for a college trip to córdoba. when it’s my turn to go through the metal detector, i take off my leather jacket and my bullet belt and hand them to the customs official to check by hand, as i know they’ll set the detector off.

    “what’s this?” she asks, holding up the belt [for lo’ t’was a she this time, proving - if nothing else that fuckwitted stupiditiy is not an entirely male preserve].

    “it’s a belt” i say

    “you can’t take ammunition on an aeroplane!” she almost squeaks in her astonishment

    [at this point i should point - out for those unfamiliar with what a bullet belt is, and who may be tempted to side with the customs officer and chide me for a fool and a knave - that a bullet belt is a belt made by clipping together spent cartridge cases, which the MOD sells on to army surplus shops and the like. they are widely available in such shops [at a considerable markup] and - polished up or chrome plated - from from various punk and alternative clothing ’boutiques’. they are “ammunition” in the same way that an empty beer can is an “alcoholic drink”

    anyway, back to the fun:

    i lift up the belt and show the customs woman that the belt is made from spent cartrdges

    “it’s not ammunition” i say patiently “they’re spent cartridges”

    “yes, well they could be made back into ammunition!” she states firmly

    “on a fucking aeroplane!” this time i’m the one whose voice has gone up an octave in disbelief - my mind filled with the vision of myself sat in my aeroplane seat with a pestle and mortar filled with sulphur and saltpetre on one side of the fold-down table in front of me and a crucible full of molten lead on the other - trying to convert my bullet belt back into some kind of lethal weapon. god knows what i was supposed to be going to fire the fuckers out of tho’. presumably she thought i looked capable of whipping up an automatic rifle from a couple of plastic forks and a complementary hot towel, too!

    “don’t you think someone might notice?” i continue, incredulously

    “you can’t take ammunition on board the aeroplane” repeats the customs woman blankly. falling back, at this point on another of the unwritten rules of the job; “no matter how idiotic and illogical your knee-jerk reaction to a given situation is, you must never, under any circumstances, deviate from that position, no matter what. you are wearing a cap and badge - ergo you are *always* in the right”

    in the end i have to go and find a luggage storage kiosk at the airport, where i hand my belt over, for keeping until i return from my holidays. so i board the plane beltless, but in the company of several people carrying large bottles of duty free vodka, many of whom are no doubt also carrying cigarette lighters or matches. presumably taking your own molotov cocktail components onboard being seen as posing significantly less threat to the aeroplane than a dented brass belt made of old bullet casings!

    -----

    paris, because aiport security staff make even her feel intellectual by comparison

  64. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Osama sends his love

    Did I say Osama? I meant Colin!

  65. David S

    Re: Osama sends his love

    He must be pissing himself right now. Hugging his knees in delight in his little cave, crowing with glee at the extent to which the west is over-reacting...

  66. Paul M

    There's a much simpler, proven way

    After the search etc, as the suspect is just walking away the security guard simply says "Good luck with the jihad" and anyone who turns and says "Thank you -.... d'oh!!!!" is caught!!!

  67. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Terrorists have won...

    It's all the proof you need.

    Even during the blitz when people were being blown up every night there wasn't the fear and paranoia we have today because of a handful of religious nutters.

  68. Andrew Bell
    Unhappy

    Oh dear

    I was planning on going to the US some point soon to visit a good friend of mine. Now I guess I'll be too shit scared to say anything to anyone in the airport, as I'm half Indian...

  69. Ash

    Some tit did this...

    ... in Birmingham Airport once (The only airport in the UK, AFAIK, where security still carry firearms; H&K MP5's for the buffs) at check in. He was asked if he had anything in his baggage he shouldn't, and he replied "Oh, just a bomb!".

    He was promptly greeted by shouts of "On the ground!" while several security staff extended the stocks and hit the safety catches on their guns, and the guy almost pissed himself.

    This isn't about America being thought police, but about aircraft being blown up by morons and the idiots who joke about it INSIDE AN AIRPORT.

    Think you'd say you had a backpack full of explosives on the Tube nowerdays?

  70. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    Lighten up.

    Sure protection is good. But they've got to lighten up. By reacting like this they are giving the terrorists what they want (apart form our deaths) loss of freedom. I doubt a terrorist with explosives would say a thing since they have made it clear they want to kill as well as scare. If they had explosives they would opt for the deaths not the scare. The scare is for when they don't have explosives. See the pattern? I ask, how many terrorist attacks have been prevented by this kind of reaction to spoken word? And how many attacks have been successful where someone has said they have explosives? I doubt there are any...

    Lighten up or others will do the same just to make a point.

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