back to article CSC throws mince pies at diminishing workforce

Outsourcing firm CSC has sprinkled a little bit of Christmas cheer on its thinning UK workforce by sending a mince pie to each of its employees. A source told The Register that "CSC has really gone overboard with a xmas bonus scheme this year". The company, which in recent months has slashed hundreds of jobs, told its staff …


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  1. Anonymous Coward

    No mince pie

    Darn! Being a contractor, I don't qualify for a mince pie! Then again, being a contractor is probably what keeps me (relatively) sane here.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    It's not the only bonus for employees!

    Some of us got boxes of chocolates too! Who said working for CSC has no perks? All the staff i work with are really excited about the bonus, it's the best they've had in years!

    .......oh god, someone please get me out of here................

    AC'd so that i don't get fired for christmas.

  3. Anon

    Not even all CSC staff....

    I thought that only CSC staff who were at a CSC office were getting the mince pies - if you happen to be working at a client site (therefore generating wads of revenue) you got nothing.... still, nice to be nice eh?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down


    whooo hoooo, I too got a box of chocs! They should have sent the money they used to do this to a charity instead, we're not quite charity cases yet!

  5. Anonymous Coward

    Loads of perks

    I worked for CSC for a couple of years. We had loads of perks, the ones I remember were free water, and as many paperclips as you wanted.

  6. Anonymous Coward

    No mince pie...?

    Ha Im a contractor and I got a mince pie....mind you, standing between me and free mince pies would be foolhardy in the extreme...

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    I got mine!

    I got my mince pie! Although, technically it was from a customer and not a CSC bod. Better to be a contracter than a permie. When you get made permenant you get another free perk, a P45.

    P.H. used just to show i'm the AC from earlier.

  8. Anonymous Coward


    Wonderful I got 36 of them!

    But no one likes em.......

    Now looking forward to a redundancy card

    ho ho ho

  9. Dan
    Thumb Up

    Lucky CSCers

    Grrrrr... any jobs going at CSC? Here at EDS we have received nothing at all, just the satisfaction of a job well done.

  10. Barry
    Thumb Down

    @Lucky CSCers

    Trust me, you don't want to work there. I did. Now I don't.

    Never saw a bonus either.

  11. Anonymous Coward Silver badge
    Anonymous Coward

    what's in a pie?

    Did someone send a SIGKILL to the barber daemon?

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down


    Working for CSC sounds just like working for Manpower on the IBM contract.

    Manpowers were paid considerably less than permies, and never got a bonus either. We were the second class slave pool. Sacking them was a glorious moment.

  13. Anonymous Coward

    Well ..........

    I have had several mince pies, coffee and, through the post, a Christmas card with a box of chocolates. Makes me think I'm appreciated .................. (voice off - Niurse time for more of his medication ! )

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm not sure this would be enough!

    As an ex-employee of CSC for many years I'm not sure that just one mince pie would be enough for the fat boys upstairs in Manor Offices - food used to get hoovered up in that place!! Surely CSC could have stretched to 2 or maybe even 3 box fulls to keep their staff alert over the festive period?

  15. Anonymous Coward

    Chocolate/Mince Pie confusion

    Don't confuse the chocolate "gift" with the "come and have a mince pie", they are totally different things... the former was mailed out to employees the latter was available in offices to come and collect.

    Oh and ask your manager if they got the chocolates too....

  16. Anonymous Coward

    Mince Pies

    Look on the back of the mince pie boxes - I bet they were made in India - I heard that CSC outsourced the manufacture of them to India - they had Mr Kipling (apparently a lowely paid under pressure IT techie) doing 'Knowledge Transfer' earlier this year.

    Script is here :

    ......Also now everytime a batch of mince pies is needed, someone in india phones the UK to get a UK person to talk them through the process of making mince pies - as the person that had the knowledge in India left and due to staff turnover the script keeps getting lost apparently.

    ....Rumour has it that despite handing over the knowledge, Mr Kipling is as busy as ever still carrying out the same work.......

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down


    I've heard they are currently flying in 3000 of the guys from India to the UK to collect their mince pies as (in CSCs eyes), this is more cost effective than sending the mince pies to India.

    Whilst in the UK, these Indian employees will be visiting the aforementioned Mr Kipling's "Mince Pie Disaster Recovery Facility" at a hidden location, so that next year's mince pie production can be outsourced.

  18. Bob Tnuc


    It's quite fitting that CSC chose mince pies this year as not only do their staff have to battle endless red tape but once through that they have endless mincers to deal with throughout the company!

    Rumour has it these mince pies were actually due to be delivered last year but in typical Tier 1 fashion they were delayed until this year.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Over engineering mince pies..

    You've heard wrong about flying them in.. what's actually happened thus far is that Elves that normally make the mince pies have been made redundant and 20,000 height challenged indians wearing xmas turbans have been employed to help administer the mince pie 'distribution logistics'.. What's happened so far is that about 1000 various employee information spreadsheets have been gathered together, analysed and 'manipulated' in Microsoft Access 1992 version and the results have been given back to 'Head Office'.. this may explain why people in Fiji, Timbuktu and Saturns 3rd moon have all received a surprise box of mince pies and CSC staff are all getting excited for nothing...

    All is not lost tho.. as the xmas indians have been backing up the distribution lists for next year so save the exercise being repeated.... so not to worry... as backing up data is what they do best.....

    or do they...


  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Manor Offices

    Some of us take great offence at being called fat! Anyway the one known as "The Pieman" left last year.

  21. Anonymous Coward


    The Fat postmen in chesterfield are balloting for strike action as they all got two mince pies last year and the merger of the Leeds office means these have been shared. The Fat postmen are not happy, more pies please

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    now i regret it

    I left CSC and never even got EVR. Now I find out they are handing out free mince pies....Gutted. Wish I'd stayed

  23. Anonymous Coward

    Have you checked ?

    Has any one checked the sell by date?

  24. Anonymous Coward

    Sell by date?

    Do you mean the mince pies/chocolates or CSC itself?

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    personal touch

    Well, I was shagging the missis, when the doorbell rang, bugger.

    Went downstairs and the postwoman gave me this red jiffy bag. I know I should have realised where it was from but it didn't register at first.

    So I opened it and it was a bloody carton of lindt chocolates and a birthday card from one of the managers, can't remember who it was, there are bloody loads of em.

    I thought, that's a nice personal touch, NOT.

    Why could't they just hand em out at work.

    Mind you, I must say they were very nice :)

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Merry Christmas to ME!!!

    well i didn't get a mince pie or a box of chocolates.....but i did get a crate of becks, obviously i'm more important than the rest of you :-)

  27. archie lukas

    NhS reward scheme


    The NHS:

    Well we got nothing, most of us are working over the festive period too, but wait!

    I got free skin disease from all the cleaning and chemical/cheap latex gloves and terminated my career this year and no chance of compensation!

    Huzzah !!!

    God bless us one and all

    (Tiny Tim)

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Merry Christmas to ME!!!

    and now a bottle of champers....sensing a disturbing theme. Combined with the grow your own venus fly trap kit I got as well i'm thinking xmas may be interesting in my office

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    CSC's gift to the North American workers

    ..... that's right.... we got nothing..... except the glorious "Hey, at least you didn't lose your job!" manager comments.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Free Mince Pies and Chocolates??

    It's only 4 months since I left and already they are handing out gifts to staff >:-(

    Never mind, I shall console myself with the 10's of thousands of pounds they gave me to piss off :-)

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