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back to article Bought some uranium ore? You'll need the anal douche, then

We're obliged this chilly Monday to reader Arthur Chance for alerting us to the agreeable fact that Amazon.com is doing a nice line in discounted uranium ore. Well, the glowing testimonials speak for themselves, but what really caught our eye was the "Customers Who Bought Items Like This Also Bought" bit at the bottom: …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Is this treatment for...

    Is this treatment for nuclear piles, perhaps?

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  2. Matt Bradley
    Black Helicopters

    Litvinenko

    Now we know how the radiactive material was introduced into Alexander Litvinenko's body...

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  3. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Awww dammit..

    .. processing takes an additional 4 to 5 days.

    I'll have to put back my evil scheme for world domination back a week.

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  4. lansalot
    Coat

    Uranium ores ?

    Standing around in their underwear suggest the ladies to be more like common ores to me.

    I'll get my etc.

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  5. Anonymous Coward
    Alien

    And...

    I followed that link (OK, so its a boring day), and although the "also bought" link now lacks the French knickers, the next item beside the, umm, medical devices is "The Simpsons Movie, (widescreen edition)". Not to mention the "Fresh whole rabbit" and the UFO O2 detector... You have to wonder.

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  6. Timothy Slade
    Happy

    @lansalot

    very funny: CaWS (Cracked a wee smile)

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  7. Cliff

    Bikini Atoll

    Is that the answer that connects them all?

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  8. Timothy Slade
    Alien

    Uranium

    useful for cleaning uranus...?

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  9. Daniel B.
    Boffin

    1.2 Gigawatts!

    Ah, so Doc Brown was right! 22 years into the future, and you can already buy nuclear fuel!

    Anyway ... it would still take Marty a week to get his DeLorean running again ...

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  10. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Aha!

    So that's how the Iranians enrich their uranium.

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  11. censored

    Eh?

    I don't get it? Why does Amazon.com sell a variety of anal douches? I always knew our septic cousins were a little strange...

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  12. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    Am I the only person who finds this disturbing?

    I'm waiting for a science-bod to post reasons on why this is nothing for us to worry about.

    Anyone?

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  13. Nexox Enigma

    u238

    Uranium 238 is hardly radioactive at all and isn't nearly unstable enough to produce a sustained chain reaction. This is probably what they've got left over after they pull the fissionable U235 out of it. Stock ore comes with about 0.77% U235, you need 3% for most fission reactors, and something like 95% before it is considered weapons grade. As far as I know just about anyone can buy U3O8 (Uranium Oxide) ore for about $30/lb, but that isn't terribly useful unless you've got an impressive enrichment setup in your basement.

    Would make for a neat paperweight though...

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  14. Stratman

    Fear not

    The uranium on offer is U238, which is only an emitter of weak alpha particles. The stuff that goes "Bang!" is U235, which is found in naturally extracted uranium but comprises less than 1% . That's why the Middle East camel jockeys are busy churning out centrifuges.

    If the label on the jar is accurate and it contains just U238 then what they are selling is Depleted Uranium, popular in military circles for making very dense penetrators. Which could, I suppose, explain why "People who bought ............

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  15. Bad Beaver
    Paris Hilton

    @ censored

    Uhm, but the uranium doesn't bother you?

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  16. SnowHawk
    Joke

    The other customer

    The other customer must have been Ahmedinijad.

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  17. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    What is this???

    Further down the page is the "Customers who viewed this item also viewed..." section which has something interesting on page 9/9.

    SPECIAL ORDER DEPT. 30 MISC.

    For $227,272,727.27 ???

    I'll take 4 of those......

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  18. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Prepare to be probed!

    <-- wrong finger, but you get the idea ...

    Try searching Amazon for "UFO detector" -- you also get rectal syringes.

    It's only the polite thing to do, if you are expecting to get anally probed.

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  19. Sampler
    Happy

    Arthur Chance?

    Is he a good friend of Ivor Biggun and Hugh Jass by any coincidence?

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  20. Franklin

    But wait! It gets worse!

    Amazon customers who bought armored land tanks ALSO bought anal douches!

    http://www.amazon.com/JL421-Badonkadonk-Land-Cruiser-Tank/dp/B00067F1CE/ref=pd_sbs_misc_title_1

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  21. Jason Harvey

    And if you need more radioactive sources...

    http://www.imagesco.com/geiger/radioactive-sources.html

    go to the source of all the interesting linking.

    not near as humorous as the Amazon links though.

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  22. david Silver badge

    lovely color, but...

    It makes a lovely colour in paint or as a glaze (as does lead), but like lead or any other heavy metal, it is very poisonous.

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  23. Mark Aggleton

    Shrek

    I see customers also bought Shrek 3 DVD which could explain his(?) colour.

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