back to article BOFH: Friday madness

It's a Friday afternoon and the clock has stopped. All the clocks have stopped. It's been 2:15pm for the past two hours, I'm sure of it. "COME OOOOONNN!" the PFY whines. "It's no use," I say. "The seconds hand is moving but the minutes hand has just stopped!" "I want the pub," the PFY gasps. "I NEED the pub!" "Me too," I …


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  1. Stuart johnson

    that makes three of us!

    Oh how I wish there were even a pub across the road to look enviously at! Just four cream walls and screaming children running around M. Control looking for ways to break in! Give me strength...or send me home early! Pleeeeeeeeeeease!

  2. Trygve Henriksen
    Thumb Up

    Even worse...

    You got home from a looong(3 days) and boring course late last night, and really needs some shut-eye, but all kinds of drones keep poking their head into mission control...


    I still have a server and some printer drivers to install, but... There's just two hours left of the workday...

  3. Matt Major
    Thumb Up

    another good one

    another cracking BOFH.

    really brighten up my friday

  4. Darren Brooke

    make that four...


    is it hometime yet?

  5. Andy Blackburn

    I'm off...

    1405 here... PUB OCLOCK!

    Was actually meant to leave 2.3 minutes ago, but got stuck waiting for the pain I knew would come... and it did :)

    Got me coat...

  6. Anonymous Coward

    jacket + door

    ..there's a pint or three of Nethergate 'Wise Monkeys' waiting, that's if the Landlord hasn't finished the barrel (leave some for the great unwashed please, Shane!).

    I wonder how many potential/actual BOFHs and PFYs in London would fancy meeting up for cogitation and victuals? No, scrap that, just got an image.....


  7. Frank van Wensveen

    Too true!

    If there was ever any doubt that the BOFH has his grubby roots in hard everyday reality, this is it! I've got pricelists on a website to update (except it's not a price list, it's a puzzle) and I need to sort out some damn alignment problem in a style sheet that should have been taken out and burned three years ago. Oh, and with two hours to go until the weekend starts I'm expected to code up the framework for another website that has been in the works for three weeks now but for some strange reason only started to move this Friday afternoon and apparently has to be delivered by Monday morning. I wonder by whom, but it won't be me, mate.

    Sigh. Even Windows' Solitaire is beginning to look good. It's time I got out of here!!!!

  8. Rachel

    Oh great


    I am in Texas here..

    I am just certain that after reading this it is now going to stay 7:25 am all day....

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up


    Its 13:37, The boss is on holiday.... I'm off to the pub :D (thanks you for teaching us the ways of BoFH'dem)!!

  10. Ferry Boat

    God, I'm bored

    There is no beer icon and I was going to spend the afternoon making an ASCII one but these silly comments are proportionally spaced. Now what am I supposed to do.

  11. AMA07
    IT Angle

    It's too early

    Rachel, it's made it up to 8:08 in this part of Texas.

    Ah, the good old trusty cattle prod.

  12. Adam Reiniger
    Paris Hilton

    What.. would Jesus do?

    Well, I can't see a Jesus icon, but Paris is close enough to one, plus she has the question mark..

    So the question is... What... would Paris do?

    Not long to go in the workday, nothing to do... what would she do in a situation like that?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    Beer Icon

    I second the recommendation for a BEER Icon, c'mon this is a IT news website (and Paris Hilton fan site)

    Currently making lots of unnecessary changes to a DLL that won't be needed and won't work because it looks productive (and could make a plausible case for doing) whilst ACTUALLY reading the Register.

    IT Rulez. (that is the Hip way of saying rules isn't it ????)

  14. Rob

    I'm slightly better off...

    ... as my clock seems frozen on 2:19 so I'm 4mins closer to heaven.

    Disappointed that this BOFH doesn't at least run to 3 or 4 pages, I've now gotta find something else to read for the rest of the afternoon.

  15. Keith Williams

    talking about icons

    where's the manfrommars's icon

  16. Dave Bennett

    Work swap?

    It's now 14:32 (still) and I have 3 1/2 hours to go until the start of the weekend and thus my last minute holiday to the Maldives!

    Profit analysis stops time. Anyone want to swap a bit of work with me? Perhaps one of you out there works for a professional TF2 gaming outfit? Maybe? Hmm?



  17. Anonymous Coward

    Beer icon

    I'll third the request for a beer icon, but also would like some form of nostalgia icon... like I remember the last time I got to go to the pub!

    Oh, the rush of pointless things to do today... and people expect things to actually get done!

    Don't forget to turn the lights off and close the door on the way out.

    I'll use the invisible man being fondled icon, because I really need to get my coat and get out of here!

  18. Anonymous Coward

    Add another one

    Working in education atm, got some christmas fair going on so no teachers are interested in giving me work! Well at least ill get a mince pie (first one of this season) before being let loose on the weekend, kid free too (thanks mam:) DVR's here i come. (double vodka redbull) beer is gasy

  19. Anonymous Coward

    @ What.. would Jesus do?

    You do realise you used the words "Paris" and "workday" in close conjunction!! An oxymoron, surely?

    (Nudged it's way to 15:45 here, but I'm sure that last 5 minutes lasted an hour!!)

  20. Anonymous Coward


    I'm here till 10pm, shush, all of you :)

  21. Darkside


    Where are they, on Mars? An outside pub table's just become free of what, flooding?

    In the South-East it's a windy murky half-dark afternoon, everything's damp and it's only just not raining, even the smokers aren't bothering.

    THE PUBS SUCK in fact I can feel the suction from here - luckily the eastward pull of the Goblin's balanced by the westward drag of the Nag's Head.

    If we can't have a beer icon will they let us bring our own? Like those avatars on supplier forums?

  22. BossHog

    It's 16:54

    16:54 - come on baby, you can do it! A cold pint of London Porter awaits!

  23. Christine Yates
    Dead Vulture

    It could be worse...

    Darkside, at least you're not here in Wales. I never thought I would say this, but I miss the South-East.

    Please excuse while I dry off under the covers with a bottle of Magners. Or two. Or three..

  24. Joseph Zygnerski

    Why, oh why?

    Only 12:55 in NY. Almost half the day to go before I head to the pub.

  25. Anonymous Coward

    13:25 and alls in the well ......

    13:25 and the day is dragging on as I wince at the glare coming from the lone window. Its grey brown outside and just a nip of coolness at only a seasonable -2 C

    No beer her withing a few minutes walk or even drive ( I don't count that blue'n'yellow furniture place as somewhere to get a decent beer)

    Oh joy of joys.... I have just been handed a project to write up before the end of the day that is not going to be happening till mid January but they need the document by Monday morning for review and all that ...... *sigh*

    I hope my Strongbow is still in the fridge at home else its a Moosehead for me.

    (yup need a generic Beer icon)

  26. Anonymous Coward

    Could be worse

    My day started at 6am, its 13:38 now and won't end until....22:00 so only another 9 hours to go

  27. Phillip Rhodes

    2:58 in North Carolina

    it's 2:58 pm here in NC... and I'm pretty sure the clock is stopped. If I had a cattle prod handy I'd almost be ready to use it on myself just to break the monotony of this bloody slow afternoon.

  28. Anonymous Coward

    3:30 in Green Bay

    So, not only did the Packers lose, but I'm stuck here until 5:00. On Friday afternoons, does IT drop into some kind of time warp/alternate universe where time stands still? Everyone else in this place manages to sneak out, but not me. Oh, no! A printer might jam at 4:57!!! The Pottery Barn website might not load!!! Even eBay is starting to lose its appeal.

  29. Anonymous Coward


    I've been running around like a chicken with my head cut off all day. It's 16:50 and I've just NOW had a chance to read the BOFH...

  30. tim
    Black Helicopters

    why wait to 14:45?

    'ere lads, 'ave a shufty at a lucky lad! me bosses are of the 'pinion that fridays are splendid for all god's creatures. and our day ends at NOON accordingly. so, whilst kicking and knocking back for some time , i finally view the reg only to find m'self privileged for once to work in a maze-like works cobbled together in a '20's manufactory where my bosses are odd, but nice.

    sympathies to the rest of you for this and any friday... i'll be the one at the pub with a comfy buzz, and one of the best seats!

    oh , and i do "rise of the machines" work too!

  31. Alistair Wall
    IT Angle

    The solution

    Ensure all the clocks in the office are synchronised to UTC, then install your own time server.

  32. Anonymous Coward


    I'm reading this on Saturday morning, so I've still got most of the weekend left and I've got next week off. So to all of you reading this on Monday morning....... ha ha ha ha ha enjoy your work suckers!!!

    (and I've got an xmas party to look forward to on Thursday in glorious Battersea)


  33. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    I Love My Company

    My company has a sure way to get around all of the people wanting to go to a pub!

    They installed a beer tap and at 2pm on fridays the barrel of Miller is hooked up and the fridge is filled with wine... Help yourselfs lads!

    and everyone leaves at 56pm pissed as a fart!!!!

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The Pub

    Friday was the "end of year/xmas" dinner ... so we got out at 15:00!!!

    Lots of beer, lots of tequila. by 20:00 the "free" beer, tequila and most of anything with alcohol was gone!

  35. rhidian

    And Monday comes around again...

    Still, GMT -minus 13 means that by the time GMT people are starting work I've finished and am beer time :D

    Plus the weathers great in Auckland NZ ;p

    Great BOFH, C.P. For the win

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Oh! me dear.

    And to think, I was ready to believe all this until I saw the choics of Magners

  37. alyn

    Miller!!! thats not beer

    Anonymous Coward - everyone was writing about beer. since when has Miller ever produced anything resembling beer?

  38. Anonymous Coward

    drinking whisky

    I don't(can't) drink beer only whisky or whiskey - will I still be able to use the beer icon if we get one?

    Oh yes, it's our Christmas party tomorrow. Free booze AND all the girls from the regional offices!!

    Yes that is my dirty mac thankyou.

  39. Dex
    Thumb Down

    PUB :D

    Roll on the weekend and why is it whenever you look at the time it drags more

  40. Martin Jones
    IT Angle


    Nope, paint me pink and call me daft, but I don't get the CP ending of this one.

    Anyone explain please?

  41. Dean Wheatley


    I spy with my little eye something beginning with C (attle) P (rod)" KZZZRRT!

    I, for one, will be enjoying a hearty session n our christmas meal from about 1pm.....and nop doubt waking up in a ditch somtime tomorrow...

    Have fun and remember drink sensibly or you might spill some :)

  42. Christine Yates

    And what's wrong with Magners?

    Say now or forever hold your peace. If you decide to say now, be prepared to meet a cattle prod tomorrow.

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