back to article England flops shafted by enormous todger

Opera singing Brit Tony Henry has become a Croatian hero for mispronouncing a line in the country's national anthem before its team consigned a lamentable England to the dustbin of footballing history on Wednesday night. The ditty is "written in the old Croat style", the Telegraph explains, and instead of singing Mila kuda si …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Dave Silver badge
    Happy

    Obvious to say it....

    ...but I suppose that would be classified as a c**k up then

  2. Will
    Coat

    taxi for one

    obviously made a bit of a dick of himself

  3. Richard Steiner
    Joke

    Flops? Todger? Wot? Speak English, please. :-)

    The American kind, of course. Since we outnumber you limey laddies, we ought to be able to define things from our side of the pond, right? :-)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Soooo.......

    ...to win at football requires a man singing about the size of his penis beforehand..

    I can see why we aren't doing well at the game.

  5. Risky

    If follows

    Well if the England team can't be bothered to check up and realise that their the Croats were better than them, then gettign the anthem right was going to be tricky.

    Now what was the other one, oh yes:

    "God help our hopless team,................"

  6. Neil
    Coat

    Does this mean

    That Scott Carson (and/or McLaren) wasn't the biggest prick of the night?

  7. Michael
    Coat

    Obvious correction

    a MASSIVE cock up

  8. Jonathan Whiteley
    Coat

    RE:Obvious to say it....

    I'd say it was a huge cock up.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Hmm

    No need to ask about where the PH angle is then?

  10. Frank Haney
    Paris Hilton

    I'm Sure...

    I'm sure there must be a Paris Hilton angle to this story.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    confusion

    ... obviously he'd not learnt the croat anthem, but the scroat anthem...

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Foot in mouth

    Sounds like a cock and bull story to me..

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Richard Steiner

    THIS. IS. ENGLAND!

    *makes reference to football played without padding and how american 'football' players wouldn't stand a chance in a professional rugby game*

    Colour not color, rumour not rumor, football not soccer, aluminium not aluminum, oh and humour not humor ;)

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    They are speaking english

    As much as I hate American English, flop and todger are British.

    Shorted Oxford English Dictionary online search returns.

    todger

    • noun Brit. vulgar slang a man’s penis.

    — ORIGIN of unknown origin.

    flop

    • verb (flopped, flopping) 1 hang or swing loosely. 2 sit or lie down heavily and clumsily. 3 informal fail totally.

    • noun 1 a heavy and clumsy fall. 2 informal a total failure.

    — ORIGIN variant of FLAP.

    It however 'WOT' is not english (TXT?) or at least not in the context you meant.

    wot

    singular present of WIT2.

    Back to school?

  15. call me scruffy
    Joke

    Re: English Please

    You see, English is a bit like Microsoft, there are many more users of English than the English themselves, but the English get to call the shots.

    If you don't like this, please, feel free to learn Finnish, but you'll have to accept that not may English words work in that language, or may do things you weren't expecting.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Hmm...

    I think this guy is just making a mountain out of a mole hill...

    Got the coat, Taxi?

  17. Lloyd
    Flame

    Oi Coward

    "aluminium not aluminum" is incorrect, Sir Humphry Davy originally proposed the name alumium for the element, which was undiscovered at the time. He later changed the spelling to aluminum and it soon changed again to aluminium, so technically it should be called alumium as that was the initial naming but any of the 3 would do.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Hmm ...

    Not sure why I'm posting, I didn't really have a comment to make.

    I'll get me croat.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    English as she is spoke

    a supposed conversation between the Queen mother and a worker in a shipyard

    "Are you copper bottoming 'em my man?

    no I'm aluminiuming 'em mum"

    Try saying that with a mouthful of crisps!

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I for one...

    ... welcome our new mountain sized penises overlords.

  21. Rob
    Mars

    football?

    there was a football match on was there? -and we lost you say?

    "tries to give a damn and fails"

    (i choose the icon that looks a bit like a football/tit)

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Engrish?

    "Flops? Todger? Wot? Speak English, please. :-) The American kind, of course. Since we outnumber you limey laddies, we ought to be able to define things from our side of the pond, right? :-)"

    Well there are more English speakers in China than in the US, so by that logic we should go with their ranguage conventions.

  23. laird cummings
    Coat

    One wonders...

    Just how many likely young Croat lasses came 'round to see if Tony's boast had any basis...

  24. Luther Blissett

    @I for one welcome our new mountain sized penises overlords.

    So we have a Ms Coward in our midst. Would you like to meet your new overlord now?

    However much I like fried overlord, I think I'll stand this one out.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Pricky man!

    Q: Whom do you call a man with 11 pricks?

    A; McLaren !

    I am so glad England are out. Surely we shall be spared force feeding Football frenzy by the media when/till the day arrives. Phew. What a respite.

    As for Limp, Wimp, Todgers, bothers who?

    PS: Can El Reg also please stop any references to I-phone, their sales/lack of, etc etc. I am getting allergic to the very mention of the term?

  26. Dave Murray Silver badge
    Joke

    Greetings from Scotland

    I was in Tesco earlier today buying OXO cubes. They had Chicken, Lamb, Vegetable and England. "What's the England one?" I asked the assistant. "That's a new one we've just launched" she replied. "It's a laughing stock!"

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Greetings from Croatia!

    First, I'd like to comment on the translation of "Mila kura si planina". It is here translated into "My penis is a mountain". Actually, it is impossible to translate it, because it doesn't make any sense in Croatian. :-) "Kura" would translate into something like "treatment", but not in the medical sense. Now, a similar word, "kurac", is penis in croatian slang. That would be "dick, prick, cock..." in English.

    Second, I'd like to tell you a joke we have here in Croatia:

    What is the difference between England and Lewis Hamilton?

    Lewis Hamilton still has his McLaren. :-)

  28. Nano nano

    Greetings from Putin

    ... Whereas "kurok" in Russian means "cock" as in to cock a gun, so there must be some connection ...

  29. John
    Flame

    Football and, er, cocks???

    I thought football (soccer) was a girls game?

  30. Alex Barwick
    Happy

    Talking of Girls Games

    At least the England Ladies are doing better than the mens England team, perhaps we should have fielded them against Croatia we might have won, no perhaps not the Croaians may have got the wrong idea especialy the cock up in the National Anthem and it would have ended up as a a good mass Porno game

This topic is closed for new posts.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2020