England flops shafted by enormous todger

Opera singing Brit Tony Henry has become a Croatian hero for mispronouncing a line in the country's national anthem before its team consigned a lamentable England to the dustbin of footballing history on Wednesday night. The ditty is "written in the old Croat style", the Telegraph explains, and instead of singing Mila kuda si …

[Dave]

Obvious to say it....

...but I suppose that would be classified as a c**k up then

[Will]

taxi for one

obviously made a bit of a dick of himself

[Richard Steiner]

Flops? Todger? Wot? Speak English, please. :-)

The American kind, of course. Since we outnumber you limey laddies, we ought to be able to define things from our side of the pond, right? :-)

[Anonymous Coward]

Soooo.......

...to win at football requires a man singing about the size of his penis beforehand..

I can see why we aren't doing well at the game.

[Risky]

If follows

Well if the England team can't be bothered to check up and realise that their the Croats were better than them, then gettign the anthem right was going to be tricky.

Now what was the other one, oh yes:

"God help our hopless team,................"

[Neil]

Does this mean

That Scott Carson (and/or McLaren) wasn't the biggest prick of the night?

[Michael]

Obvious correction

a MASSIVE cock up

[Jonathan Whiteley]

RE:Obvious to say it....

I'd say it was a huge cock up.

[Anonymous Coward]

Hmm

No need to ask about where the PH angle is then?

[Frank Haney]

I'm Sure...

I'm sure there must be a Paris Hilton angle to this story.

[Anonymous Coward]

confusion

... obviously he'd not learnt the croat anthem, but the scroat anthem...

[Anonymous Coward]

Foot in mouth

Sounds like a cock and bull story to me..

[Anonymous Coward]

@Richard Steiner

THIS. IS. ENGLAND!

*makes reference to football played without padding and how american 'football' players wouldn't stand a chance in a professional rugby game*

Colour not color, rumour not rumor, football not soccer, aluminium not aluminum, oh and humour not humor ;)

[Anonymous Coward]

They are speaking english

As much as I hate American English, flop and todger are British.

Shorted Oxford English Dictionary online search returns.

todger

• noun Brit. vulgar slang a man’s penis.

— ORIGIN of unknown origin.

flop

• verb (flopped, flopping) 1 hang or swing loosely. 2 sit or lie down heavily and clumsily. 3 informal fail totally.

• noun 1 a heavy and clumsy fall. 2 informal a total failure.

— ORIGIN variant of FLAP.

It however 'WOT' is not english (TXT?) or at least not in the context you meant.

wot

singular present of WIT2.

Back to school?

[call me scruffy]

Re: English Please

You see, English is a bit like Microsoft, there are many more users of English than the English themselves, but the English get to call the shots.

If you don't like this, please, feel free to learn Finnish, but you'll have to accept that not may English words work in that language, or may do things you weren't expecting.

[Anonymous Coward]

Hmm...

I think this guy is just making a mountain out of a mole hill...

Got the coat, Taxi?

[Lloyd]

Oi Coward

"aluminium not aluminum" is incorrect, Sir Humphry Davy originally proposed the name alumium for the element, which was undiscovered at the time. He later changed the spelling to aluminum and it soon changed again to aluminium, so technically it should be called alumium as that was the initial naming but any of the 3 would do.

[Anonymous Coward]

Hmm ...

Not sure why I'm posting, I didn't really have a comment to make.

I'll get me croat.

[Anonymous Coward]

English as she is spoke

a supposed conversation between the Queen mother and a worker in a shipyard

"Are you copper bottoming 'em my man?

no I'm aluminiuming 'em mum"

Try saying that with a mouthful of crisps!

[Anonymous Coward]

I for one...

... welcome our new mountain sized penises overlords.

[Rob]

football?

there was a football match on was there? -and we lost you say?

"tries to give a damn and fails"

(i choose the icon that looks a bit like a football/tit)

[Anonymous Coward]

Engrish?

"Flops? Todger? Wot? Speak English, please. :-) The American kind, of course. Since we outnumber you limey laddies, we ought to be able to define things from our side of the pond, right? :-)"

Well there are more English speakers in China than in the US, so by that logic we should go with their ranguage conventions.

[laird cummings]

One wonders...

Just how many likely young Croat lasses came 'round to see if Tony's boast had any basis...

[Luther Blissett]

@I for one welcome our new mountain sized penises overlords.

So we have a Ms Coward in our midst. Would you like to meet your new overlord now?

However much I like fried overlord, I think I'll stand this one out.

[Anonymous Coward]

Pricky man!

Q: Whom do you call a man with 11 pricks?

A; McLaren !

I am so glad England are out. Surely we shall be spared force feeding Football frenzy by the media when/till the day arrives. Phew. What a respite.

As for Limp, Wimp, Todgers, bothers who?

PS: Can El Reg also please stop any references to I-phone, their sales/lack of, etc etc. I am getting allergic to the very mention of the term?

[Dave Murray]

Greetings from Scotland

I was in Tesco earlier today buying OXO cubes. They had Chicken, Lamb, Vegetable and England. "What's the England one?" I asked the assistant. "That's a new one we've just launched" she replied. "It's a laughing stock!"

[Anonymous Coward]

Greetings from Croatia!

First, I'd like to comment on the translation of "Mila kura si planina". It is here translated into "My penis is a mountain". Actually, it is impossible to translate it, because it doesn't make any sense in Croatian. :-) "Kura" would translate into something like "treatment", but not in the medical sense. Now, a similar word, "kurac", is penis in croatian slang. That would be "dick, prick, cock..." in English.

Second, I'd like to tell you a joke we have here in Croatia:

What is the difference between England and Lewis Hamilton?

Lewis Hamilton still has his McLaren. :-)

[Nano nano]

Greetings from Putin

... Whereas "kurok" in Russian means "cock" as in to cock a gun, so there must be some connection ...

[John]

Football and, er, cocks???

I thought football (soccer) was a girls game?

[Alex Barwick]

Talking of Girls Games

At least the England Ladies are doing better than the mens England team, perhaps we should have fielded them against Croatia we might have won, no perhaps not the Croaians may have got the wrong idea especialy the cock up in the National Anthem and it would have ended up as a a good mass Porno game