back to article BOFH: Workplace accidents = 0

"Excellent," the new Boss burbles as the PFY updates the 'days since last workplace accident' sign (put there since the last IT decimation). "Ten days since the last accident." "I think you'll find that's a binary number," the PFY says. "Still... 10 days," the Boss counters to much rolling of eyes. "And that's only because …

COMMENTS

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  1. Chris
    Heart

    LOL what a place to work

    Dammm I need to find a job as assistant to the BofH alongside with the PFY these guys have it well...

    They don't pay tax and anyone who wants to dob them in "mysteriously" leaves without a trace,,,,

    Well Done Simon you made up for the not so brilliant episode last week!

    Cheers mate!

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    New BOFH?

    Hey! What happened to Simon?

  3. uncle sjohie
    Paris Hilton

    Aaaah

    Allways nice to have the quiet support of higher management.... :-)

  4. Duncan Robertson
    Jobs Horns

    The Bastard's back - but not in his usual form...

    Quality! It almost suggests that users learn... Ha! That'll be the day!

  5. Jason Rivers
    Thumb Up

    a soft spot...

    so it would appear the CEO *DOES* Have a soft sport for Simon and his PFY afterall!

    this one made my laugh to the extent of some of my sandwich ending up on my monitor. Keep it up Simon!

  6. Dave Burns

    Another Quality Episode!

    Well made up for the one last week! Great to see the CEO getting his hands dirty!

  7. Michael Born
    Pirate

    Ahhh...good to see that Simon...

    Still has his Homicidal tendencies, and they can't be removed by the ravages of time!!

    It really is good to see the BOFH at the helm of another 'inexplicable' accident (even if he didn't cause it), but at least we know that, if it came to the crunch, HIS name would be where the CEO is now (could also mean some form of blackmail for increase the "operating budget", methinks!)

    I would have started the monitors running the moment the boss had walked out, keeping a "technical" eye on things, but can't win 'em all, eh?

    Great weekend to all the people in BOFH land

    Your friendly neighborhood Printer Engineer From Hell!

  8. Rosuav

    Still, 10 days...

    I'm just glad it didn't go 10 more days, because the Boss would have become suspicious if the board said 100 already...

  9. Dan Collett
    Thumb Up

    Awesome, Awesome, Awesome.....

    As always........Although one cant help but miss the satisfaction that comes from high voltage Kzzzzeeerrrrrttt!

    Oh the good ol' days!

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    only one thing to say...

    BoFH, we salute you!

    I can't get by without my weekly fix, and this one was absolutely genius. I may have to go back and read the archives for the 20th time :D

  11. JP Strauss
    Alert

    The CEO is the PFY's uncle...

    if I recall way back when he was first appointed.

  12. Jason Works
    Black Helicopters

    Don't make me do it .... Damn you all to HELL

    Don't make me do it....Damn you all to HELL. Now i am gonna have to go back and re-read all of the past BOFH

    Now i have a full day ahead of me .....

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Title

    Didn't they leave the company the PFY's uncle was the CEO at? I thought Simon got fired and the PFY followed him by testing gravity with his uncle's laptop.

  14. Jeff Wojciechowski
    Boffin

    Its just not FRIDAY without BOFH!

    Thanks again for making my Friday complete! Makes up for the dodgy quiz last week....well almost!

  15. Peter

    Oh god...

    Funny... but geez... if such a company really existed, a war zone would probably be safer to work in.

  16. Don Marquis

    True to form

    Ha! A clear example of horizontal and vertical integration of corporate responsibilities. Not all managerium is dense, apparently.... The CEO must be made from a hitherto unknown isotope.

  17. Graham
    Dead Vulture

    @Peter

    ...but not in the IT department... unless you were the boss, a consultant, an external technician (unless equally evil), a salesman (unless in the pub) or anyone except the heroes.

    Hmm, see your point!

  18. Andy
    Thumb Up

    :-D

    Does make sense, even the dumbest (l)user knows the jam they`d get into if the IRS finds out about their moonlighting and other shady dealings.

  19. Chris Fleming
    Pirate

    Ahhh!!!

    Beware of the...

    That is the sign on Simons farm gate.

  20. Matt Thornton

    Ouch

    Good episode... minus the Terry Waite bit!!

  21. Matthew Stoltenberg

    Not nephew

    They quit that place around the time of the y2k bug if I recall..

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  23. Steve
    Coat

    Class, sheer class

    When surrounded by idiots and time is dragging by like a dog after a vindaloo on the carpet of life, BOFH never fails to put things into perspective.

    And his metaphors are much better than mine....

    Keep it up - I wish I could....

    I'll get my coat....

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    'days since last workplace accident'

    really needs to be updated with

    "Todays workplace accident rate".

    Just keep the same font style and colour and only those who actually bother to read the signs will note the slight change in wording. Would produce some nice non-zero numbers.

    I really do wonder what the running rates are. Lost work-days, limbs, personnel and trespassers. (ie salesmen, auditors, engineers and other unwelcome personages)

    Heh - Might just have the bored but affable graphic artists here bash one up between time wasting alterations to already approved paste-ups .... ^_^

  25. Phillip Rhodes
    Unhappy

    Wait a bloody minute

    Are you lot saying that this isn't how businesses in the UK really operate?!?

    Damn, time to put this visa application through the shredder I suppose... I was all set to move just to see this wonderful working environment!

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