Mum sends stripper to teenage son's school

A Nottinghamshire lad had a "birthday to remember" after a stripper turned up at his school, burst into his drama class and proceeded to flaunt herself like a two-buck hussy as shocked teacher and students looked on. According to the Telegraph, the clothes-shedding strumpet was dispatched to Nottingham's Arnold Hill School and …

[Anonymous Coward]

Everyone would have been

arrested and jailed here in the US, to save the school from having to explain how she got in.

[Del Merritt]

Gorilla my dreams...

... confused with "Girl with butt creams..."

[Anthony Sims]

damn!

Thats not fair, that stuff never happened when I went to that school!!

[Anonymous Coward]

at least...

.. the poor kid wasn't asked to rub whipped cream on the rear end of a guy in a gorilla suit..

[GrahamT]

Gorillagram vs strippergram

I feel sorry for the guy on his stag night that got the gorilla.

[Ash]

Insane...

I'd have got her number.

What?

[Spleen]

whipping boy

"No one could believe it. Next she ordered him to get on all fours, led him around the classroom and hit him 16 times - once for each year - on the bottom with her whip."

In Scotland she'd have been arrested for child abuse.

[Darren Burrows]

Stripper?

What I'm wondering is if the Gorilla was supposed to strip and they sent the wrong kind of stripper in error, rather than the wrong kind of act altogether.

[John]

Re: Everyone would have been

I think you are most likely right there, or worse.

Check out this story from yesterday in the good old US of A.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21661718/

Girl, 13, gets detention for hugging two friends :O

i sure as hell would have paid a lot more attention in class if there was semi naked ladies asking to have cream rubbed on their butts. Gets a big thumbs up from me.

[Anonymous Coward]

Had to be asked...

When does one 'come of age' in the UK???

Oh look at the time, got to run...

[Anonymous Coward]

Where are...

the pictures??

[Mike Moyle]

Unclear on the concept...

"No one could believe it. Next she ordered him to get on all fours, led him around the classroom and hit him 16 times - once for each year - on the bottom with her whip.

"And in case you're wondering what kind of parent would subject their offspring to this kind of humiliation, the mother in question told the school she'd actually ordered a gorilla "through an agency", but got the cream-loving dog-handler instead. "

...Clearly Mother had heard Junior talking about "spanking the monkey" and just got a bit confused... Could happen to anyone, really...

[Julian]

Makes a change...

from the normal "imagine you're a tree rustling in the breeze" drama class you normally get.

[Dan]

bet the kid

is really beating himself off about it

[Peter Knapp]

Had to be asked Pt2

Pictures???!

You can't tell me that class wasn't full of mobiles snapping away!

[Spleen]

@AC

Fair question actually, because the age of consent in Britain is 16. It's also when you can smoke - or it used to be, the Raj are postponing it to 18 now, along with alcohol. You can also get married with your parents' consent.

Generally if you were talking about "coming of age" it would be 18, being the day when you can have your first legal piss-up.

[Joe]

The aftermath

"It apparently was enough for the honoured guest of this show, since he "ran out of the classroom while the stripper calmly packed her bag and left"."

Anyone who suggests that he ran to a toilet cubicle to rub one out while her image was still fresh in his mind is a filthy rumour-mongrel of the lowest order and I condemn them thoroughly.

[David Webb]

Ran outta the classroom....

So where did he run off too? As a 16 year old boy probably into the mens to sort out the things that pop up!

[Vaughan Trevor Jones]

School will never be the same again

I have to know, the teacher stood there watching for ages. Until the boy was supposed to rub cream on the stripper. Didn't she notice the woman moving around in her underwear????

Wish I had that at school

[Kev K]

It never happened

if I cant see any pics or vid, then it never happened

[Troy Peterson]

Thats some good shit

Somebody must have been on some seriously potent butthash (ttp://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/11/06/jenkem_warning/) to mistake a stripper for a gorilla .

[Anonymous Coward]

@ John "Re: Everyone would have been"

re: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21661718/

"she and her husband told their daughter to go ahead and serve her detentions

because the only other option was a day of suspension for each skipped detention."

Good Old US of A - what a policy. Just keep hugging and not turning up for detentions, see how many stack up before you leave school...

[Anthony Chambers]

Stripper V Gorilla

"And in case you're wondering what kind of parent would subject their offspring to this kind of humiliation, the mother in question told the school she'd actually ordered a gorilla"

I'm wondering what kind of parent would send a gorilla to school for their 16th birthday, what a bitch!

[Luther Blissett]

Coming of age in UK

It is legal for me (or you) to sodomize a 16 year old in the UK, but illegal to give them a cigarette afterwards (18 up only). It's a mad mad mad world.

Perhaps the rationale for this is that it is quite plausible to think of being accosted by a gang of 16 year olds outside a shop and being coerced into buying them cigarettes, whereas it is not plausible to think of being accosted by said same group and being coerced into buggering them senseless.

However, such ruminations seem to lose all sense in view of some mothers. (I wonder if Martians are so stupid).

[Silas Humphreys]

some age-of-consent-ish pedantry...

You can still legally smoke at 16. You just can't legally buy your coffin nails until you hit 18. No, I don't understand it either.

You can also buy your own beer, wine, cider or perry as part of a meal order at age 16 (having been allowed to drink the stuff since 5, under parental supervision; and "Two pints of wifebeater and a bowl of chips" doesn't count).

From 18, anything legally allowed is yours.

[Graham Jordan]

Dang

Just down the road from where I live that. The one time im not hanging around with a bag of sweets and something interesting happens..

[John Imrie]

Ciggies

I was under the impression it was legal to buy them under the age of 16, just not legal to sell them to anyone under that age.

[Nick Ryan]

Re: Dang

Bad show - but if you were there maybe you'd have needed strawberries instead of sweets...

[Daniel B.]

Age of consent...

Ah, at least you get everything at age 18 in the UK. The US screwed up some stuff by letting tobacco at 18, but alcohol at 21. Thus even if "coming-of-age" is at 18, you still are barred of most "cool" places because they have a strict 21+ policy. Idiots. </rant>

Anyway ... that birthday party beats the stripper-shaped cake once proposed for a friends' 20th birthday ... whoa!

[Anonymous Coward]

IT Angle

The obvious stealth IT angle is that at this day and age, someone is bound to have wiped out a camera phone and filmed the whole ordeal the moment the lady with the whip turned on the music.

So where is the mandatory youtubage?

We should be told.

[John A Blackley]

@Graham Jordan

Best post of the day, Graham.

[Matthew Smith]

From 18, anything legally allowed is yours.

Except for that essential for a fulfilled life, the HGV licence

[Matt Horrocks]

@John Imrie

"I was under the impression it was legal to buy them under the age of 16, just not legal to sell them to anyone under that age."

Recently (starting either this month or last - I forget which) they changed it to being illegal to sell them to anyone under the age of 18 - although as with alcohol, I don't *think* it is illegal to *buy* whatever your age, just illegal to sell it to someone under 18.

[Jason Togneri]

Age of consent

In the UK there is no "age of whatever", because the legal systems vary. What may be 16 in Scotland is 18 in England and Wales, and can be 21 in Northern Ireland. Many things, however, are national, such as voting, alcohol and films. It's a sad thing that you can get married in Scotland without parental consent at 16, and while you can then legally and morally shag the missus, you're not legally allowed to watch 18-rated soft porn. You can also join up and serve in Iraq at 16 but you're still not allowed to vote for two years, but that's another issue.

Where's the photos?

[Fozzy]

I should entire story

To be fair to the teacher, you could tell she was just stunned - and when the cream came out she told the stripper 'That's it. That's enough'."

<give me a couple of minutes and I'll be right to go again/>

[Symrstar]

The music...

is torture enough. Brittney Spears can turn something that I wished would have happened to me, into something that would scar me for life. I think the guest of honor fled because of the soundtrack.

[Nick Galloway]

Surge!?

I bet there is a surge in enrolments next year for that college!!!

[Peter van der Sluijs]

And the IT angle here is....?

OK, OK, I'm a humorless whatsit - it's a funny story but does it belong here?

[Anonymous Coward]

Sodomizing

@Luther Blissett "It is legal for me (or you) to sodomize a 16 year old in the UK, but illegal to give them a cigarette afterwards (18 up only). It's a mad mad mad world."

Sodomy is illegal in the UK under Section 61 of the Offences Against The Person Act 1861. I beleive this has never been repealed?

[Anonymous Coward]

@Peter van der Sluijs

"Whatsit" == Copper nanotube ?

[David S]

About that other story, the "girl gets detention for hugging friend" one...

Cool quote from a school representative:

"It is in poor taste, reflects poor judgment, and brings discredit to the school and to the persons involved.”

And I agree entirely with that. Unfortunately, in my case, I'd be talking about the detentions, where I believe the representative was talking about the "displays of affection".

Uptight wierdos...

[Jesse Bartholomew]

Very much like other contries of the monarchy

Canada is the same way with some butally messed up laws in regards to age.

In Canada it is Legal to:

Smoke at 16, but you Cannot buy Cigarettes until you are 19

You Can serve Alcohol at 18, but Cannot drink until 19

I really question the smoking one, as if it is illegal to sell/provide Cigarettes to any person under 19 under penalty of up to a $50,000 Fine and Jail but it is perfectly legal for a 16 year old to smoke, how are they legally getting the cigarettes?

[Anonymous Coward]

@Peter van der Sluijs

It is a boot note!!

Some IT people realise that there might be just a little bit more to life than just IT. Others just get the industry its reputation....

[Josh]

Age...

In the US, you can go to war "for your country" at 18, and get your legs blown off, and get stuck in a chair. Then, if you come back and get drunk because your life is now in shambles, and wheel around town like any self respecting wheel-chair-bound-alcoholic, you can be arrested for under-age consumption and driving under the influence.

[Anonymous Coward]

And All Because?

In my day the sex education class was given by the biology teacher who demonstrated a bunsen burner being shoved into a hole in the sink cover. How much more interesting those particular lessons might have been with the Paris Hilton lookalike taking part.....