US Govt to force manditory psycological screening of all cattle to prevent future terrorist suicide cows.
A US couple had a lucky escape when a 600lb cow unexpectedly landed on the bonnet of their minivan, unsurprisingly causing "heavy damage". According to AP, Michigan-based Charles and Linda Everson were visiting the area around Lake Chelan, Washington, to celebrate their first wedding anniversary. On their way back to the hotel …
This post has been deleted by its author
OMG its the first bit for the cows that WANT to be killed/eaten! Just as Douglas Adams predicted!
The cows actually try to make their selves tasty and tender, and try to entice people in the restaurant to eat various choice bits!
Its unfortunate the first one fell off a cliff though.
Hey what's the Paris Hilton angle?!
- So did the driver needed emergency 'teatment' afterwards?
- Is this just another bullsh1t story?
- Clearly is an act of Cow-ardice.
- Was it a mad cow or was it just slightly upset
- Was it playing *hide* and seek?
- Was the driver's stomach 'churned'?
- Were his knees like butter?
- Her friends dairyed her to jump.
- He'll probably have to beef up his insurance after this.
- Can't milk this one any further ...
- Driver obviously couldn't 'steer' out of the way
- Witnesses stated they heard a 'long-horn' blast.
- Driver was said to be going 'hell-for-leather' when accident occurred.
- This happened in Ireland while ago. The surviving cows tried to pin trhe blame on the driver, but the authorities said it was a case of " the cattle calling the Pat black".
Ok, thank mercy I have a day job....
<coat over shoulder>
Just found this link :
Should have sent Lester that one if only for this gem of a quote :
“It was bred for rodeo,” Harris said. “It was not your normal cow in a field.”
No shit sherlock! :-)
And what about the last thoughts of the beast ?
Maybe, like in Douglas Addams' famous book, something like "Oh, what is this object coming at very high speed ? Big, brown. I wonder if we'll be friend." or more "hmmm, this van seems to come very fast, maybe jumping off the cliff wasn't the brighest idea ..."
Why was this cow teatering on the edge of a cliff? Was it looking to have a mooving experience or is there an udder reason? Maybe it was on the horns of a dilemma which would render the horns inoperable and hence no warning being given?
Trying to put coat on but this damn straitjacket makes finding arm holes difficult.
Saw the pics of the car from URLs in earlier comments.
Car still driveable (was the guy in shock ? why didn't he stop?)
A drop of 200ft would give a terminal velocity of around 70 mph.
I think after 600lbs of cow falling on a car at 70mph neither the cow or the car would require "euthenasing"
"Yup, Seattle weather sucks. Rains all the time. This. however, is slightly unusual."
For those without the benefit of (or wherewithal to use) google or mapquest, Manson is 300 km east of Seattle, over a mountain range, at the edge of a high desert plain. Definitely not pacific maritime/Seattle climes.
Most travellers in the area are accustomed to "danger: falling rocks" signs, which I hope will be humorously vandalized to commemorate this event.
"England Threatened By Medieval French Terror Weapon Technology, Trojan Rabbit Upgrade In the Works"
In a secret weapons test gone horribly awry, a French MIRV (Mooing Intercontinental Re-entry Vehicle) went off-course and failed to respond to the self-destruct signal from Mission Control in Le Havre. On learning that the French had violated treaty obligations by resuming development of this terror weapon, MOD vowed to counter it with a hovercraft version of the venerable Trojan Rabbit. When confronted with the damning evidence, a French military attaché threatened gas warfare "in your general direction".
Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2021