Daily smut digest..
f*cking awesome article, exactly the reason I read the El Reg.. to lighten up my day and get a daily dosage of smut.
"To learn how to make computers more human, we have to f*ck them." - Stefan Lutschinger, Arse Elektronika How could El Reg fail to cover a conference with presentations like Paging Dr. Moreau: "Humanimal" Porn in the Age of Xenotransplants and Genetic Chimera on the agenda - a conference set in a San Francisco dungeon porn …
If it takes a two hansded robotic chainsaw dildo fuckmonster to pleasure a woman, how can I compete?
My willy feels smaller and smaller just thinking about it. At least if they had a chainsaw sheath for it..........maybe with built in taser capabilities to stun my prey. Captain Cyborg beware. And you thought playing "swords" would end there.
What about the technology for men? Why is it that all I get are various lubes, the Fleshlight, and if I happen to have several grand a Real Doll? Where is my mega-cuntzilla with pulsating hyperfriction walls? Seriously. And while you're at it make it tell me how sexy I am when I write regexes.
If I've understood you right and teledildonics is you're favourite new word, you're a bit late to the party. Wackypedia says the term was coined in the 1980s by some bloke called Ted Nelson. Rather more recently, Wired had the word in an article title, back in 2004.... the word's not *that* new, you need to get out of that solicitor's office more often.
Did Burke just get bored of writing articles about online gambling regulations and insist he be sent on a jolly to cover something with naked women? Or did they think "who is the most depraved individual on the payroll? I know, we'll send the lawyer."
Also, does he know what Burke actually means? Could this also be the reason he was sent?
I saw a great little video of the chainsaw being demoed by a model on the Howard Stern radio show (US shock DJ - pretty much the original one).
She appeared to enjoy it a lot - and it gave me some great hints on my technique. The main one being that my technique is irrelevant; speed, and pressure are what matter, specifically speed and pressure beyond the ken of man. Ah well, these machines don't actually make me feel significantly more inferior than BIG military or construction equipment.
Ah, here it is.
do I really need to say NSFW?
How did they ask the audience for a volunteer ??
"excuse me, would any of you ladies like to be pleasured by our robot in front of a room full of strangers ? C'mon dont be shy ?? "
i can just imagine the woman in question volunteering and the other 99 pairs of eyes looking at her in horrid fascination, maybe considering her slightly sick ??
how many actual "volunteers" were there ??
hehhe me thinks id like to meet the young lady in question ;o)