back to article Top US boffin plans jizz-based LEDs

One of America's top light-emitting-diode boffins plans to develop improved LEDs made from sperm. Salmon sperm, to be precise - for now at any rate. According to a tongue-in-cheek University of Cincinnati release dated last week, Prof Andrew Steckl is quite forthright about his plans. "Biological materials have many …


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  1. Kevin Campbell


    given the content of the article (well done, BTW), must Mr. Page get his OWN coat?

  2. Michael Sheils


    I think you managed to hit every single sperm based reference in this story, brilliant.

  3. Charlie Clark Silver badge


    Given that declines in fish fertility have been traced to the pseudo-oestrogens in modern plastics it is a little ironic that we'll soon be using their sperm in new plastics. What are possible effects of disposing of worn-out cream-screens?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Power Surges

    Imagine a power surge like from Monsters Inc. when the new Playboy issues are released; or at least a slight power increase one week out of the month.

  5. amanfromMars Silver badge

    An Invitation to Party to the Erotic Core ......ITs Centre.

    A Veritable PerlyGatesPython Beta Classic, Lewis/El Reg.

    Wanna Lead We'll Follow?

    Which is a Quantum BetaTest for British IntelAIgents too....... Special Forces of CyberIntelAIgents and their Earthbound Control Facilities.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Given the number of bad jokes and puns in that article... Why are you only sorry for the last one?

  7. Blain Hamon

    Not all references...

    No mention if the air force is providing all the seed capitol or not.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    You forgot another one

    They're going to be making money hand-over-fist...

  9. Andy Crofts


    Thanks! I stand erect to your writing, Sir!


  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Top Notch!

    Well done, sir!

  11. Sam

    sorry in advance

    Two tired out salmon pause in a pool halfway up the waterfalls, and one says to the other; "Why don't we just stop here and have a wank?"

    The wax jacket, thanks, it's Autumn y'know..

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And if it's a success...

    Who knows what sort of off-shoot projects will come from this?

  13. BitTwister


    come come, now...


  14. Jason

    Economic miracle

    Cue new industry for teenage boys. Popularity of paper routes plummets

  15. Olly Molyneux

    at least now..

    ... the salmon will have something do to after they've caught their flies.


  16. Barry Carr


    A fantastic new word to add to the English lexicon. Congrats to its originator

  17. Mark Roome

    Where is the obligatory comments ...

    I have restrained myself for a number of days, but I cannot anymore!

    Surely it would be better to use whale sperm? I sure it would go a whole lot further.

  18. Daniel Bennett


    I wonder how long delivery is ;)

    *Gets jacket and breifly walks out before re entering to start again*

    I wonder how fast arrival is?

    *Get jacket and stays out*

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