back to article Fired-up eco-boffin gives it '180 per cent'

Old school football managers are often heard to confess they're "as sick as a parrot" because despite the lads "giving it 110 percent", their team has just taken a severe pasting. The problem is, 110 per cent just isn't enough of an overcrank for the modern world we live in. The proof comes in the form of environmental …


This topic is closed for new posts.


    1. Ken Hagan Gold badge

      Re: Something divided by zero is Infinity

      Yeah, I hear that a lot. It depends on the something.

      In practice, division by zero usually arises when people start with a model, like "A/B" and extrapolate. If A is definitely non-zero and non-infinite, but B tends to zero, limit(A/B) is certainly infinite. However, if both A and B tend to infinity or zero, their ratio may be defiantly finite. It might be 0, or it might be 110%, and if you know a little bit more about A and B you might be able to figure out the right answer. (Google for L'Hopital's Rule if you care.)

      Consequently, if you simply pose a problem like "0/0" or "∞/∞" then you haven't provided enough information. It's a bit like walking up to someone in the street and saying "What's the answer, then?".

  1. Remy Redert

    re: Pregnant sheep

    If you established that a pregnant sheep is a sheep which bears 1 lamb, then yes, this makes sense.

    Of course that would be silly with animals that have a high chance of giving birth to twins or triplets and you would instead say that a pregnant sheep is any sheep which bears any number of lambs. Now your pregnancy rate is down to normal again.

  2. Anonymous Coward

    now the carbon credits and manmade climate disaster claims make sense

    if their basic concept of math is this bad, how can we possibly expect them to create or interpret intricate models of a system no one yet has all the proper inputs for?

    explains the economic theories that American political leadership uses too.

  3. tommy060289

    clearly what is needed is...

    for El Reg to classify a standard Unit of measurement for effort, I suspect I may already have a formula. Since power is the RATE at which WORK IS DONE, we can simply measure it in Watts.

    However, as it appears that certain industries require their people to give more than others, what is clearly needed is a compliance factor which will be inversely proportional so that our measurement of effort works across all borders. So for example, if a footballer was expected to put in twice as much work per hour as a trolley dolly down the local supermarket, then footballers compliance factor would be '1' and the Trolley Dolly's would be '2'.

    Therefore, our formula of:

    Effort = compliance factor * Power

    then the work done by the Trolley Dolly in an hour should be half that of the football to achieve the same 'effort' rating, as this is what is expected of them.

    Now all we we need a unit for our measurement, may I suggest the BS

    1. Poor Coco

      Name of the unit...

      ...should clearly be the, "what?"

      1. mmiied


        no the unit of effort should be the F**K

        as in not giving a F**K

  4. Anonymous Coward


    I give infinity % +1....

    Top that!!!!

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Probably not the first to reply...


      I give infinity % +1....

      Top that!!!!


      Is that all?

      I give infinity % +2

      Please consider yourself topped!

      That was easy. Now I'm off to leverage my stakeholders, synergistically mind, in order to produce optimum outcomes in the near-field but with a laser-like long-term focus on the game-changers upcoming in the market event horizon.

  5. Goes to 11
    Thumb Up

    Nigel: 110%

    ........Well these go to eleven

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    My son went to the University of Pennsylvania. At a "parent orientation", we were greeted by a faculty member who told us that, even though the new students were among the brightest in the nation, he expected fully half of those who graduated would be in the bottom 50% of the class.

    Knowing more than a little math, I just smiled, but some of the other parents had really scared looks for the longest time. I think they expected everybody to graduate in the top 2%.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      yeah, well...

      ...I used to work in a copy shop. You should have seen the disappointed looks from people when I told them their copies had come out upside down.

      Amazingly, I was not fired - nor was the guy who changed the POS keyboard numpad from 123, 456, 789 to phone-style 789, 456, 123. Most cashiers weren't touch typists... So people would get charged $2.33 instead of $8.99, or $75.43 instead of $15.49.

      Good times. I was in the money, too - they screwed up payroll and were paying at time-and-a-half... All the time. Being a generally honest guy, I notified them... Twice. After the second time I decided that my responsibility to fix their accounting only went so far...

  7. Dave 15 Silver badge


    I always give a billion% on a Monday morning, nearly 5billion% by Tuesday... of course % of what would be an interesting question.

    The idiots that come up with this should just be asked that question - % of what? I don't care if they are talking 1%, 100%, 180%... % of what should be the automatic response, followed by arsehole


This topic is closed for new posts.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2021