back to article BOFH: It's Friday, it's time to RTFM

BOFH logo telephone with devil's horns "Just wanting to know if you've got the answers to the RFIs on our RFP – as we need them ASAP," the Boss says, practicing his acronyms. "The RFIs for the RFP?" the PFY says. "You never said you needed them PDQ. I emailed the vendor for clarification but they were either AFK or AWOL so I …

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  1. Potemkine! Silver badge

    Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

    Just asking.

    == Bring us Dabbsy back! ==

    1. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
      Unhappy

      Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

      From what I gathered, there was a parting of the ways a month or so ago.

      But you can still get your fix at his site - https://autosaveisforwimps.substack.com/

      I wholeheartedly agree with your sentiments though, the weekend preparation isn't the same without our fix of something for it.

      Bring him back!

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

        "But you can still get your fix at his site - https://autosaveisforwimps.substack.com/ "

        And having been over there a couple weeks back, it looked like there may be a post every few weeks or even months. But since he's no longer submitting to El Reg, he seems to be doing exactly the same style on a weekly basis now. Actually more so in terms of style. The double entendres are back, which seemed to be lacking ion recent El Reg submissions.

        He also explains in the comments on this weeks article why and what went on with El Reg, ie not much.

      2. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

        Now you know

        Straight from the horse's mouth for those who want to know, and may agree to disagree and suggest a wrong is easily righted in the light of the evidence that there is definitely a greater unknown good out there fully appreciative of the greater alternative AI and IT side for El Reg to uncover and cover.

        SFTW started out as a little bit of fun thought up by my friend Bob Dormon who was in charge of reviews and weekend features at The Reg at the time; we had previously been freelance colleagues at MacUser magazine. That it lasted a decade surprised nobody more than me. The Reg felt it was time to move on. There's nothing sinister about that. I don't think it was a fabulously well-read column: very few readers shared it on social media (many thanks to the handful that did on a regular basis!), and I imagine it was difficult to sell ad space on it. .... Alistair Dabbs https://autosaveisforwimps.substack.com/p/she-was-so-many-things-to-so-many/comments

        1. imanidiot Silver badge

          Re: Now you know

          shares on social media seem like a super tone deaf way of measuring engagement on a site like El Reg that seems to attract a rather "anti-social (media)" crowd. Looking at the comments in the Regs own comment system seems like a much more accurate metric and in that regard in terms of reader engagement I think SFTWS was one of the top columns after the BOFH.

          El Reg seems to have lost it's irreverent, rebellious touch over the years and it feels like it's trying to walk the straight and narrow of being just another tech publication. Which imho makes it lose all added value as that makes it just yet another tech publication.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Now you know

            The new cooperate overlord, is from California. unfortunately all they actually care about is social media. makes sense why its the new metric. its stupid. but I understand why its happening.

    2. oiseau Silver badge
      WTF?

      Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

      Hello:

      == Bring us Dabbsy back! ==

      Yes.

      WTF is he?

      Why is his regular column not being published?

      Why hasn't ElReg said nothing?

      Not at all happy with this ...

      O.

      1. Spanners Silver badge
        Go

        Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

        Let's see if this works...

        He can be seen at https://autosaveisforwimps.substack.com/

        Another link for my lunchbreak reading.

        1. ConsumedByFire

          Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

          One less reason to read ElReg if Dabbsy has gone.

          How long is it til the mgmnt part ways with BOFH one wonders. Anything that gets too popular seems to get dropped it seems :-(

          1. Blackjack Silver badge

            Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

            BOFH is one of the most read things on this site.

            That being said, this dose of BOFH was extremely tame. No one died, the Boss didn't get taken away by paramedics, and no one lost money.

        2. ConsumedByFire
          Pint

          Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

          As for the this weeks BOFH ... Too many TLAs :-)

          1. ConsumedByFire

            Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

            Seems like ElReg may have too many PHBs.

            Whats going on guys? We're a loyal readership but we seem to find out about personnel changes by the grapevine rather than by editorials. Sort your selves out or I need to update my favourites.

            And how about an editorial? A broadsheet daily has one . .

            1. ConsumedByFire

              Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

              I notice also . . . hmmmm . . . . how to express this.

              So the branding used to be "The Register - Biting the Hand that feeds IT". I can't see the Biting the hand bit anyomore. Whats going on PHBs in ElReg world. Have you sold out?

              Have you sold out?

              1. EnviableOne Silver badge

                Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

                Its more nibbling on the crumbs IT feeds it. now

                ElReg used to pick justifiable holes in everyone and have a reasonable amount of scepticism, rather than swallowing down marketing speak.

          2. Will Godfrey Silver badge
            Happy

            Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

            A fair few FLAs too.

            Sorry I'm Iate, I was doing something a bit... errr out there.

            Meeting friends IRL.

            1. jonathan keith
              Headmaster

              Re: Where is my beloved "SFTW" chronicle?

              "FLAs"? My understanding is that the correct technical terminology is "ETLAs"...

    3. This post has been deleted by its author

  2. Nick Ryan Silver badge

    Change the acronyms and that's my office.

    So many needless acronyms and all one has to turn away for a moment and the damn things go forth and multiply.

    1. Terry 6 Silver badge

      Years back my then boss returned from a meeting with the big guns in the Town Hall. Nervously told us we couldn't say, let alone write in an email, the word "Thousand" any more. We had to say "K". Sometimes the fuckwittery reaches legendary levels.

      1. ttlanhil

        Did someone miss hear "thou sand" and think they were being called a beach?

        1. Flightmode
          Pint

          Occasionally, you see someone make a comment so elaborate and exquisite in its simplicity that you just want to look inside their brain to see what made it happen. You've made my day. Magnificent. Thank you.

      2. Ozan

        I used K for thousand and M for million in emails for years. One day big boss asked me about them (While everybody used it, he asked me because he sure hated my guts). I explained K for kilo and M is for mega and they come from SI units.

        1. Death Boffin

          When M doesn't mean what you think it means

          That works until you run into someone who uses M to mean thousand. It is MMXXII after all.

          1. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
            Joke

            Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

            Yes, but what have the Romans ever done for us?

          2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

            Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

            "That works until you run into someone who uses M to mean thousand."

            Have you met our new Secretary of State for business, energy and industrial strategy?

            1. BebopWeBop
              Trollface

              Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

              bad luck. He's not ours

          3. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

            when I was younger, years were counted from the date a new sovereign accessed his throne, so we are in year I.

            1. O RLY

              Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

              Sure, that makes sense. The North Koreans still use a date system based on the birth of Kim Il Sung.

              https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juche_calendar

              https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juche_calendar

            2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

              Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

              "years were counted from the date a new sovereign accessed his throne"

              That was certainly how a lot of legal documents were dated so you need to know on what date in the year the accession fell. An entire published volume of the Wakefield Manorial Rolls has a classic off-by-one error, presumably by misinterpreting that.

          4. PRR Bronze badge

            Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

            > uses M to mean thousand. It is MMXXII after all.

            Yes, and US electronics schematics used M=1000 all through the 1930s; WE and a couple music-amplifier companies well into the 1950s. Some of that gear is well beloved in Hi-Fi or guitar-amp crowds. Post-1950 eyes look at those plans and the first reaction is "That's all wrong!"

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

              Didn't they also used to use "m" for microfarads for a while? ISTR some funky old schematics that were off by three orders if magnitude.

              1. NITS

                Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

                Back in the Day, at least in West Pondia, 1 mfd was a microfarad, 1 mmfd was a picofarad (pronounced "mickey-mike"). The unit of conductance was the mho. Tuning dials were calibrated in kilocycles and megacycles. And schematics had wires hopping over each other so as not to look connected.

              2. Charlie Clark Silver badge
                Coat

                Re: When M doesn't mean what you think it means

                m for mill (10^-3) and µ for micro (10^-6). But context is everything… Mines the one with a box of 10M Farad capacitors in the pocket!

        2. Justin Case
          Windows

          SI units say K is for Kelvin, k is for kilo.

          Uppercase for units based on people's names.

          Uppercase for prefixes M and above, lowercase for prefixes k and below.

          So, you were in fact mishtaken and not half as clever as you think!

          1. This post has been deleted by its author

          2. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
            Boffin

            Be careful - you're comparing units and multipliers there.

            Kelvin is a unit, but kilo is a multiplier (1000x).

            In SI units, 1000K could be written as 1kK for example - although I admit that does look weird.

            "Kilo" in common parlance is shorthand for kilogram (as in "a kilo of spuds" for example) - kilo is the multiplier but gram is the unit.

            k is something of an oddity overall though, as it doesn't have a fractional equivalent (such as m being x1/1000th and M being x1000 for example) to require the case distinction.

            1. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
              Pint

              M as x1000000 rather, not x1000

              That'll teach me for typing it on my phone and missing the 10 minute editing time-out.

              Is it time for these yet? ------>

            2. TRT Silver badge

              mK.

              Drugs are bad.

            3. Charlie Clark Silver badge

              Just sit back and admire "km" and think of all the things it could stand for!

              1. tezboyes

                KMFDM and their alt MDFMK

            4. tezboyes

              And on occasion K = 1024, k = 1000.

          3. Strahd Ivarius Silver badge

            what about L for liter?

            1. FrogsAndChips

              I've always used l for liter, but both l and L are valid. It's not an SI unit so the convention doesn't apply.

              1. Colonel Mad

                I use one of those to spark a fag.

      3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        "Sometimes the fuckwittery reaches legendary levels."

        I remember a friend who worked at a university telling me about a memo that went round banning people from introducing their wives as "my wife" at faculty "do's" because "my" implies "ownership".

        1. Norman Nescio Silver badge

          I remember a friend who worked at a university telling me about a memo that went round banning people from introducing their wives as "my wife" at faculty "do's" because "my" implies "ownership".

          Presumably this met with approval from the kind of person who routinely refers to their female spouse as 'the wife'.

        2. Charlie Clark Silver badge

          SWMBO would kill me on sight if I failed to admit ownership! Of course, we really know who owns whom!

    2. Evil Auditor Silver badge

      I once worked for a company that replicated their acronyms in job ads. Not even I, as an employee, understood this manure.

    3. Horst U Rodeinon
      Unhappy

      ACRONYM is NOT an acronym

      Several decades ago, I went to work at a US military contractor. One of their documents was an acronym decoder which contained, I kid you not,

      "ACRONYM - Abbreviated Coded Rendition Of Name Yielding Meaning."

      I have never been able to delete that twaddle from memory.

      1. Totally not a Cylon Silver badge
        Alert

        Re: ACRONYM is NOT an acronym

        Ahhh, the fabled bacronym; pick a word and then force the title of something to fit....

        Normally found lurking in DC waiting to ambush an unsuspecting 'carbon based lifeform'

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