the smut level.
Is off the scale.
You could have at least posted this on Friday.
Rooted dildo, ::snigger::
Ah, so much for a professional look at my desk...
Sex toy designer Svakom decided that a vibrator needed a camera on the end, and it also needed a Wi-Fi access point – with the utterly predictable result that the device is hackable. Pen Test Partners – these jokes just write themselves, really – took a look at the device, and the researchers probably wish they hadn’t, because …
ElReg should make a deep dive investigation into the matter, penetrating the issue to the core, & end the story with a thunderous climax revelation!
Don't let them pull the wood er wool over your eyes, don't let them fap you off with buzzword bullshite, make them give it to you straight.
Demand answers, demand full disclosure, & don't settle for anything less than full satisfaction.
I'll get my coat, it's the one with the plastic splash guard over the top...
That's the problem with the sex toys industry: you can't notify them because they understand something different under "a heads up"..
Originally I assumed they must have come up with some nifty image stabilisation if they get decent pictures from something that vibrates, probably viscous damping..
"Not really - sperm cells have a lifetime of a few days, but new ones are created all the time."
The mobile in a trouser side pocket is very close to them for most of every day - and there are many millions present in the testes at that time. So if the radiation can cause mutations then the probability is there. If the probability is low then any mutated sperm are unlikely to be the winners in the fertilisation race.
There are fewer eggs in the ovaries - but even these sex toys will get nowhere as close to them.
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*Sigh* how many times do I have to tell people that battery powered devices like this are completely incapable of generating ionizing radiation since they lack the high-voltage components to do so. You'd need to figure out some way of dumping an entire battery's energy into a burst of a few nanoseconds to get any ionizing radiation, and even then, that radiation is no where near harmful to organic matter.
Being within a meter of another human is going to generate an infinitely larger amount of ionizing radiation (Due to the natural break-down of carbon-18 into carbon-16 as part of life) than a cell phone would produce, much less something like Bluetooth.
"*Sigh* how many times do I have to tell people that battery powered devices like this are completely incapable of generating ionizing radiation "
An awful lot, I'm afraid. With the real mumetal underpants wearers, the argument that microwaves are non-ionising tends to result in some kind of woo that perhaps they make proteins or DNA vibrate in a way that causes damage. Of course you can cause thermal damage to proteins and DNA if you concentrate enough microwaves, but not with wifi. Phones can in exceptional cases cause burns - if they are in contact with skin and the battery and CPU get hot - but that's good old heat, not microwaves.
However, given the intended use of this - er - device, the biggest risk is probably an STD transmitted by inadequate sterilisation between users.
Not so much the Internet of Things, more the Internet of Thing Substitutes, with the same risks.
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I've long been a fan of Pam Ayres, haven't we all, so I feel moved to write a poem to hopefully capture how she would've commented on this story. Here we are:
I got my girl a Siime
To use under her slacks.
She used it up front,
She used it round the back.
It saved my soul
When I was feeling knacked,
I'd fire up my iPad,
And watch the attack.
One day around nine,
She put her Siime
Where the sun doesn't shine,
I was close to getting mine.
I was having a whack,
When I read in The Reg,
That the Siime could be hacked,
My composure was cracked,
So I pulled up my pants,
And put on a bet,
That most of the net,
Had seen her all wet*
(* in the shower of course)
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