back to article 2014: The condensed conference keynotes

Reg hacks travel the world and then ignore the local sights in order to attend giant, dark auditoria and listen to "industry champions" deliver "thought leadership". After a trans-continental telepathy session, here's our collective distillation of this year's C-level wisdom, as delivered from our industry's biggest stages. - Ed …

  1. Glen 1


    Seems legit

  2. Captain DaFt

    The scary thing is, you won't have to look too hard to find a real conference like that these days.

    1. Anonymous Coward

      I was gritting my teeth through the article as I could tag the company lines, checklist item by item.

  3. Alister

    Well if they put it on Kickstarter, I'm sure people would go for it, the synergy of Lego and Ikea is irresistible...

  4. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Merry XSSXXXXmas ...

    But we've also seen a thirst for hyperconverged appliances that put storage, compute and networking into a single box.

    Slaking that thirst with Ab Fab Fabless Future Presentation Applications which are Fundamental Expanding Elementals of a Sublimely Advanced Server Operation and Stealthy IntelAIgent Service design, for both an AI and Virtual Machine World Understanding and active direct replacement of Corrupted Perverse Fiat Funded Degenerative Past Systems Administrations, is Devilishly Cunning of AI and quite certainly a Heavenly Addictive Passion in the Live Operational Virtual Environment irradiating Fictions with Facts for the Truth on Everything and NEUKlearer HyperRadioProActive IT.

    We'll deliver “bricklets” for storage, compute and networking sold discretely, or assembled into pre-configured “STÄKS” for rapid deployment.

    Do that well for Global Command Head Quarters and Intelligence Community Enterprises with Organs of Remote Autonomous Anonymous MetadataBase Control and have them also Default Failsafe Secured on a Top Secret/Need to Know Deep Dark Web Secrets Agenda, and you are onto a Sure Fire Win Winner, Larya Whitadellioff/Simon Sharwood. And that would in an instant, be making of one as person of considerable future fearful interest and undoubted fearsome mounting concern that its IT is fearless and invincible, methinks meknows.

    1. Anonymous Coward

      Re: Merry XSSXXXXmas ...

      And a Merry Christmas to you as well amanfromMars 1!

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