back to article Roll up, roll up for the Reg Readers' Ball

We here at El Reg have much love for our vociferous, knowledgeable, occasionally somewhat foam-flecked forum posters - even if they/you don't absolutely always love us. It's not our way in general to show affection, or indeed any other emotion - we are British, after all - but we think it may be time to put some substance …

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  1. ukgnome

    Well done El Reg

    but your user base isn't just within the ring of doom. So if you could just email me the pint instead please.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: ... 'email me the pint instead'

      Me too, please.

      1. Euripides Pants

        Re: ... 'email me the pint instead'

        I'm Old Skool, could you fax mine?

    2. Psyx

      Re: Well done El Reg

      Great idea.

      Although I can't help thinking that more than a week of notice would be good...

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Re: Well done El Reg

        And me!

    3. big_D Silver badge

      Re: Well done El Reg

      Yep, it is a bit of a jaunt from the middle of Germany to Vulture Central... Otherwise I'd pop by.

      Prost!

      1. Robin

        Re: Well done El Reg

        "Yep, it is a bit of a jaunt from the middle of Germany to Vulture Central... Otherwise I'd pop by.

        Prost!"

        Same here from southern Spain.

        Salud!

        p.s. How about a map of where Reg readers are? I reckon we'd get global coverage.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Well done El Reg

          A bit difficult to be there on a week day, I'll probably drink a Belgian beer then.

      2. Daniel von Asmuth

        Re: Well done El Reg

        'fraid I cannot book a jet plane on such short notice, so I propose a virtual toast!

    4. ElReg!comments!Pierre

      Re: email me the pint

      Time for El Reg to get with the times and deploy the latest technology, as pioneered by the Froggies:

      http://www.usbwine.com/

    5. Nick Kew

      Re: Well done El Reg

      You can send mine over IRC: the Virtual Bar.

      Some of us use the 'net to liberate us from the shackles of geography (not to mention London, with its slumlords and packed commutes). If you can't have a pint over irc or email I'll have to assume you have yet to catch up with the 1990s.

    6. Bob Vistakin
      Devil

      Re: Well done El Reg

      A virtual one for me too. Even if I could make it to the smoke, I'd prefer that to the warm pissed-in dishwater known throughout the world as London beer :-)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well done El Reg

        @ Bob Vistakin.

        We seldom agree but on that point, yeah. Conceded...

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well done El Reg

        Presumably you are thinking of London, Ohio.

    7. Allan George Dyer Silver badge
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: Well done El Reg

      In face, email me more than one... I can guarantee that my opinions become more interesting in a linear relationship with my beer intake... up to a certain value, when they cease altogether.

    8. Captain Scarlet Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: Well done El Reg

      The mysterons would attempt to replicate and transport the Beers but have been held up with Near Miss forms from the breakages this end.

    9. Tail Up

      Re: Well done El Reg

      Me too, El Reg, some virtual fiver for each of the Outistic Cowards will do (-:

    10. N2

      Re: Well done El Reg

      Could a pint be printed instead?

  2. Brewster's Angle Grinder Silver badge
    Flame

    And where do I click to register my disinterest? Never has the tombstone icon been more sorely missed.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Wot no doobies

      I know one thing: when cows graze in the vicinity of an oak, they always do so at 90° to the side on which moss grows. And if I knew which side the moss grows, I'd know two things.

      I know two things, then, since I know if I knew which side the moss grows I would know two things, except that I would, therefore, know three things.

      I do know that there's not a chance in Hell I'd be one of the 50. So I guess I do know three things.

      I bet I'd know more than three things if I put my mind to it, which is, really, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

      I think therefore I'll have a peppered, smoked mackerel sandwich and a coffee while I forget about being offered a pint with one hand and having it snatched away by the other.

  3. JDX Gold badge

    It's my wedding anniversary, maybe better not.

    Does El Reg have 50 commentards over drinking age? The forums suggest a large number are teenagers. Or maybe they just live with their parents.

    1. Evil Auditor
      Thumb Up

      @JDX

      Thumb up!

      On a completely unrelated note, can you legally get married before reaching drinking age? ;-)

      1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

        Re: @Evil Auditor

        This is for the UK.

        - Age of consent and marriage with parents agreement, 16.

        - Age at which you are legally allowed to drink, 18 (although there are variations in venues like restaurants where you can drink wine as long as it is served with a meal from a younger age).

        And another age related restriction

        - Age at which you are allowed to drive, 17 (unless you are a sole carer for a family member, where you can drive at 16).

        So you can get married but not be allowed to drive to the Wedding or participate in the Champagne Toast.

        1. Z80

          Re: @Evil Auditor

          *Parental consent for marriage not required in Scotland.

      2. thosrtanner

        Re: @JDX

        In the states you can marry at 18 but can't drink till 21.

        1. Irony Deficient Silver badge

          الغول

          thosrtanner, in the States, both marriage age and drinking age can vary by state/district/territory. It is the legal right to purchase or publicly possess alcohol that begins at age 21 (excepting Puerto Rico and the US Virgin Islands), not the legal right to drink it.

      3. Psyx

        Re: @JDX

        "On a completely unrelated note, can you legally get married before reaching drinking age?"

        This is certainly do-able in most of the Gulf States.

    2. Scroticus Canis
      Windows

      @JDX and drinking age

      Well, if not, all the more for me then. Hope they have parking for the mobility scooter. Shirley you don't expect be to be in a fit state to walk home afterwards.

  4. Elmer Phud
    WTF?

    It's shit!

    Standard Commentard input.

    And I'd like to say at this point something about W8.1 . . .

  5. Evil Auditor
    Pint

    Great idea!

    I won't attend though since I can't stand beer.

    Seriously, I'd be curious to see whether a bunch of commentards looks as nerdy as I'd expect ;-) but with 600 miles I'm just too far away. And I really can't stand beer.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Pint

      Re: Great idea!

      Other drinks are available. Particularly as they're going to hold this beanfeast in that thar poncy London. So you could have a small sherry instead.

      Or perhaps be more traditional and have a large gin...

  6. Denarius Silver badge
    Pint

    an excuse

    at last an excuse to go to the other end of planet that might be sufficient. Some of your writers have real flair and impressive knowledge. Pity I have courses that require my attendance. Anything planned for Antipodes in future ? Preferably not in that crowded traffic clogged hellhole Sydney.

    1. DiViDeD
      Pint

      Re: an excuse

      Excuse me, but that's MY adopted crowded traffic clogged hecklhole you''re insulting there. I''ll have you know that it's only actual Sydneysiders who're traditionally allowed to admit what a stinky, brown sky, horribly humid rathole it really is. To the rest of the world we present a united "best city in the world" front.

      As for the pissup, sorry, quiet get together, I'm happy to travel Business Class only. Please have your people arrange the ticket and limo

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bit of a long way for a pint for me; but I hope you have a splendid time and will quite possibly lift a synchronised pint in your general direction on the 12th.

  8. Moktu

    Boycott

    I'm not coming if Eadon isn't invited.

    What's that? I had a whelk's chance in a supernova of being invited anyway....

    /me grumbles off

    1. Evil Auditor
      Trollface

      Re: Boycott

      Wasn't Eadon an alter ego of one of the Reg hacks anyway?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Boycott

        How dare you cast dispersions on Mr Pott. >:)

        1. monkeyfish

          Re: Boycott

          Nah, it was Orlowski. WinPho fanboy that he is.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Boycott

            Are you suggesting that there is only 1 Windows Phone owner and not 2...

            Devastated...

            Sales are down 100% year on year that means...

  9. Micky 1
    Coat

    "Roll up, roll up for the Commentards' Ball"

    What are you talking about? Commentards don't HAVE balls.

    1. Evil Auditor
      Coat

      How true! That's why it says Ball, singular and just enough (or too much already) to reproduce.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        "How true! That's why it says Ball, singular"

        Congrats, you've just failed your classic policemans joke course, as well as basic English.

        1. Evil Auditor
          Happy

          @AC, a few minutes ago

          Never mind, neither of which I wanted to excel in. One of them, at least, I could if I felt need, but this being the comments' section, not so much.

    2. El Presidente

      "Commentards don't HAVE balls"

      Plenty of nuts though........

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "Commentards don't HAVE balls"

        "Plenty of nuts though........"

        And sometimes rather angry nuts. Will attendees have to wear labels with their pseudonyms on, and if so will the Reg have security on standby for the inevitable fisticuffs?

        1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
          Happy

          Re: "Commentards don't HAVE balls"

          Everyone could just have a label saying I'm Spartacus...

          Or wear V for Vendetta masks perhaps?

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Commentards don't HAVE balls.

      But The Reg has the biggest balls of all!

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXP4oAdTZ-s

  10. Rosie Davies

    To Paraphrase

    I would not wish to attend any ball that would have me.

    Rosie

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: To Paraphrase

      Or to turn that around a bit; those who want to come are probably the ones you don't want coming!

      I would suggest scanning the archives, choosing those with the most downvotes, putting them in a pub, and streaming the outcome.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: To Paraphrase

        Where's Matt Bryant when you really need him?

        I'll supply the cricket bats. :o)

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